People Who Lie About Rape Are Scum.

[Ibbi]

I have been through sexual molestation when I was 14 years old ,and when I see those stories of people who lie about it ,it makes people like me who actually have gone through it look like liars. The worst part is that I have no idea of what to do about it. I have no idea how to fix it.

[kenster1]

it happened to my friend and he spent 6 months in prison for nothing.

[Hidden]

How old are you now.

I can relate to how you feel, however I do not know if you had reported the crime at the time.

It may be you should get this addressed with a course of CBT. Your GP and CPN may be able to suggest how to address this problem, It may be all down to time, and how long the Assault took place

BOB

[Ibbi in reply to Hidden]

I'm 23 years old.

[Ibbi in reply to Hidden]

I didn't report the crime.

[Hidden in reply to Ibbi]

It was a shame you had not reported the crime. Did your Parents know the person who assaulted you ?. Generally after time passes the Rapist moves on with their life. Sad to say the assaulted find themselves living with the result of those years failing to actually move on, a lack of trust can cause serious relationship, to form as both parties in a relationship question the cause and effect the attack has caused. Parity between parties and their love for eachother can become problematic.

You need help to move on and if still possible the attacker needs to be brought to justice. This can help you to trust and form meaningful relationships.

I would advise you talk to your GP and see if a course of CBT would help in moving you on. You need to trust so you can accept what happened and move on, allowing you to find a possible partner and move together with that important trust and understanding

BOB

[Ibbi in reply to Hidden]

They don't. It was a guy who was a friend of mine at the time. I don't like to talk about it.

[hypercat54]

Hi if you look at the stats on rape you see it's a very tiny percentage of people who actually lie about it. You hear a lot about it coz it is news and because the media always like to blow things up depending on their political attitudes. They do the same things with subjects like single parents, ie they are all teenage girls getting pregnant to get a council house when in fact these are the vast minority. Unfortunately people believe all this because they choose too so any single parent (like my sisters whose husband had an affair and left her) are categorised as a scrounger and taking advantage of the system.

Back to rape this is exactly what happens here. If you read the stats you will find that around 9 in 10 rapes go unreported coz women are worried about being believed, and having to go to court to be interrogated. I would much rather concentrate on helping the 9 out of 10 to report than worry about the odd one who lies.

I am very sorry for your attack though. I do understand coz I have been through that myself. x

[Ibbi in reply to hypercat54]

Do you know the what the weird is. It has to be the guy who moelested me has a girlfriend today.

[kenster1]

despite the years that's gone by you should still report his crime and push for justice.its already robbed you of a few years don't let it rob you of any more.

[Ibbi in reply to kenster1]

Kenster I don't really have any evidence ,it's his word against mine. I don't think it's worth it.

[Diamonddaisy]

Sad to read this. I'm 60 and was 10 when I was assaulted, in school by the priest attached to the school. I didn't speak up till I was 40 because my husbands nephew abused my 3yrs old. I have a criminal record now for assaulting a minor as he was 13. So lost my nursing career over that. I also got raped be a teacher at 15 and took an overdose.

Didn't say anything as my parents would of said I was telling lies, they were both strong church goers and dad was a teacher, I knew I'd be the one in trouble. Got told after what happened to my daughter that I could oersue this but my main concern was supporting my little girl.

It is really really difficult to speak up. So I understand exactly what you feel. It's affected my relationships ever since. But. I'm still going regardless of what's happened but I hate people who lie about it too. It's the worst lie ever I. My mind.

Sending you love and strength x

[Hidden]

On reading above, it would seem you have little way to get back at this person. Given that it would seem you need help to address those negative feelings you have. You need to address and deal with the problem

Your GP should be able to help you move on with a course of CBT. You need to move on and look for a way to collect your thoughts and move on in a positive fashion CBT should help you consider the future you deserve

BOB

[Hidden]

Hi Ibbi,

I understand. Pm me if u ever want to talk.

[Ibbi in reply to Hidden]

Thanks.

[Hidden in reply to Ibbi]

You bet. Happy New Year!

[Hidden]

It happened to a friend of mine, he had to leave the town he was living in and live in a bail hostel 100 miles away for around a year. He was found not guilty very easily. But it's a horrible thing for a woman to do admittedly. There are many rapes that go unreported but that's another story