Christmas is SO stressful!

[sliverofsilver]

Hi, you might know me, but if not, then hi! Well, even if you know me already, hi.

I have had enough. Just... agh! Christmas has always meant gifts and celebration and family time and Christmas dinner for my family. Gifts, celebration, family time, that's absolutely fine, that's great. I enjoy all that. But Christmas dinner? My family are BIG Christmas fans, so we've already started having things like roast chicken, potatoes and Yorkshire pudding for lunch. It's terrible! Why so? I'm anorexic. I mean, I can eat it, but I can't yet consistently eat meat. Every time I say that I don't think I'll be able to manage the meat of the meal, my dad is understanding, he's great, and he'll negotiate some source of protein as a substitute. However, my mother looks like she's about to cry and that her heart's going to break, and acts furious at me. I can't help it, I really can't. And I apologise over and over again, but she still will not calm down. Even when I'm shaking and crying at the table from just looking at the meat, she's still not happy. I just don't know what to do. She said she'd hate for me to become a vegetarian since it'd mean a lot more work for her, and the last thing I want to do is make her more stressed when she has two children, one of which is 8 and already getting bullied, and the other of which is me, who has OCD, depression, anorexia and anxiety. She's already got loads on her plate without having to deal with me. I haven't felt suicidal for a while, but if this doesn't improve soon, I may feel like that once again. Any advice or words of comfort? I mean, at this point, even just a smiley face would make me happy.

[Hidden]

Hello welcome back

We do not really like Christmas, in the past to get away from it all we used to go on holiday abroad and when we returned everyone had fallen out and we seemed to get a very nice welcome on our return. Now we stay in the UK, however we have just returned from a week away in total peace and silence. Tomorrow we will get our Christmas food etc then close the doors for two and a half weeks, only going out for Pax and His Walks, we are expecting bad weather so we hope to remain in silence.

I am saying not to go abroad all I am saying sometimes we need peace and Christmas is the time for that.

Also I cannot remember how old you are however one way around the problem is move out in your own place boyfriend etc, then you can decide how You wish to spend the festive season. To be honest your Mam sounds really nice, so you could go home on Christmas Eve then return on Boxing Day, so you would not need to suffer the lead up to Christmas at home with family, only the three nights.

We stopped giving presents now I have no family to worry about so Christmas to me is being in front of the fire watching TV and any books purchased over the last three months.

Christmas generally can be as you want to make it, however you need to consider those around you, however only you can decide how much of the celebrations you wish to join.

To be honest, Christmas for many can be hard and regrets seem to emerge if we try and remember the year before and the future. Be thankful you do have people who seem to love you, so you Eat That Turkey and be happy

Merry Christmas

BOB

[Hidden]

My son is autistic and finds Christmas difficult. He gets into panic and stress situations and has to go to calm spot. He likes the lights and finds that sensory but he does need break.

[sliverofsilver in reply to Hidden]

I like the lights and everything too, but sometimes it can get a little too much, with everyone singing and dancing loudly, so I need a break too sometimes.

[hypercat54]

Hi I never had an eating disorder but stopped eating meat when I was 16 coz I thought it was wrong. I still don't eat it all these years later. I do eat fish though. My mum kept putting meat on my plate which I refused and she did do a lot of grumbling but I stuck to it and eventually she accepted it.

Your mum hasn't got to do any extra work as you can have the normal meals everyone else has and you can have fish with it too. I have roast dinners with fish so why not? Also you can just add a bit of cheese on your meal for protein so it's not a major problem.

I would just stick to your guns and tell her you are against cruelty to animals but make sure you do eat the rest of your meal. x

[gardengnome]

Hello Silver, can your dad be a go-between so that you and your mum can communicate with each other? Rejecting food can feel to the family cook as if they personally are being rejected,, I would guess that your mum also finds it frightening whenever she sees signs of your eating disorder...on a practical level can you prepare a vegetarian delicacy yourself, (perhaps something that others could share)