I feel so hopeless right now. Maybe because it’s 5 am and I haven’t gone to sleep yet. I just don’t want tomorrow to be a thing, and if I sleep the next thing I know it will be and I’ll have to suck it up and live through it. Thing is though I don’t really want to do that. I quite like it in the hours when everyone else has gone to bed, and the moments when I’m by myself, because then it makes sense that I feel lonely. Has anyone ever had such conflicting feelings that they leave you almost disabled in between? Like wanting nothing more than to be alone but helplessly longing for someone to just come and give you a hug? So now I’m just lying here having eaten myself sick, unable to move and without the will to sleep or to stay awake...idrk
If anyone wants to message please do, kind of wanted to talk to someone
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I was just writing in my journal how I know tomorrow is going to go. I don’t want to go to sleep because I don’t want it to be tomorrow; but I also want to go to sleep because I have such bad anxiety at night and I don’t want to feel this way either. Nighttime is scary for me. Wondering thoughts that usually cause fear.
I relate to feeling lonely but wanting to be alone. And I relate to wanting to be around people but I’d rather be alone. It’s a twisted cycle that a lot of people relate to. I’m sorry you are feeling this way. I relate and understand my dear 💜
What are the conflicting feelings, you can change your day, you can programme it to be what you want, most of us on here don’t sleep, and we all understand, imagine you have a ball of light in front of you, abd put in the ball of light, your day, even if it’s just, a stranger saying hello, xxx
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