After feeling as high as a kite at the thought of getting back into work again!!
Today, I feel really low...I don't know why this has just come on me but when I went for my job interview on 28 February 2018. (it was with a Call Centre, something I have never done before but was really looking forward to starting!), two weeks ago and was then told the day after that I was successful and had been offered a job and that the starting date was going to be 28 March 2018, I was ecstatic. The lady who interviewed me said the start date had changed and I would now be starting in April but she could not confirm the actual date in April, and I just accepted this because I was happy that I had got a job offer and this was going to be permanant... For some reason today I thought I'm going to call and find out if they have got any definite starting dates yet (after being told someone would call me). So I called and was able to speak to the lady who was there at the interview who said they still did not have a definite date yet but she was going to e-mail everyone (4 of us got positions) next week with an update.
I asked her if there were still jobs available and she said "Oh yes, definitely" I said I hoped she didnt think I was being a pest and she said Not at all, I was to call her anytime and that she was glad I had called? But she couldnt really tell me anything.
I dont know if it is just me being over-anxious or impatient but this time yesterday I was really excited about starting a new job but today I dont know if I am just kidding myself on and that at the end up there is not going to be a job for me. Just feeling really sad and confused today. Opposite of how I was feeling yesterday.
I have not had any alcohol since last year and the way I am feeling right now (disappointed to say the least - I dont want to have to go back to looking for another job, not when I thought I had one??), I would welcome some wine but I know this is not the right thing to do!!
Help!!
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En1234
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Thanks for your post. I am so sorry that you are feeling so disappointed. It seems to me that you did really well and it is just a matter of time before they let you know more about your starting date.
You have been so positive about getting this job, that is really good. Try to bear with the situation.
Do you have a friend or family member that you can talk to about this. It really can help to share these feelings.
You have also done very well staying away from alcohol. Perhaps you could tell us more about this situation and what has happened for you? Have you got any support with this situation?
You may want to have a talk with your doctor to see if they can help more.
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It is maybe the case that I am being anxious. She did say that she would contact us to let us know when in April we would be starting and it IS only 13 March..... For now I need to give her the benefit of the doubt and trust she will come back to me with some good news soon!!
I have not touched any alcohol today as I know it is not the answer. I just had a good cry. I always feel a bit better after a good cry. I will just have to bide my time. I will mark a date in my calendar for about the second week in April. If I have not heard anything by then, then I will give her another call (I don't think this would be unreasonable..??) and if she still is not able to give me a start date then I will just get my head down and start looking for something else...
No, I didn't have a drink...I know it is not the answer. Problems are problems and they can be dealt with but dealing with a problem and a hangover is a problem ten times bigger....
I am probably just being a bit over anxious today. I want so much to be able to say "I start my new job on...(date)" but I don't have THAT date yet...
She did say she would contact the four of us (only 4 of us got a job offer) by e-mail next week to give us an update but I just thought she would have been able to give me more of a heads up today. It is not yet April so there is still time for a positive outcome.
I said in an earlier post I will mark the second week in April in my calendar and if I have not heard anything by then, then I will call again (think that is time enough to wait) and if she still cant provide me with a starting date then I will just forget about that one and look for something else....again!!
Its really funny because I wasn't feeling like this last night (far from it).. I just don't know where this is coming from today. Totally out of the blue..??
LOL!! That's funny because sometimes my friend will tell me that I always look for problems where there are none (and I wonder if that is what I was doing today - and I hope it is...) but on the other hand I tend to get gut feelings about things (and normally my gut feelings are always spot on - but in this case I really do hope I'm wrong!!)...
I think what happened is that today I went for lunch with an old friend who told me I looked great and I told her I felt great, told her all about this new job I was going to get and all in all I had one of the best days I've had in ages!! Then, it was like all of a sudden I had this thought that something rotten is going to happen...it has to?? I never get this much good luck?? .... I'm never allowed to be this happy..??...So that's when I started thinking, "I'll bet I don't get this job - this will be the downside to my happiness" and of course, phoning this lady and not hearing what I WANTED to hear has just confirmed that things are not going to work out, yet 2 hours earlier I was the happiest person on the planet???
Words like yours are always a comfort. I will hang on. Was out with another friend today who agrees that I am just over-anxious...When life constantly throws shit at you, you start to think that that is what you deserve. Good news hopefully will come soon....
First of all I am so happy you found my words comforting.. your wellcome my friend, then yeah I am totally agree with you, when life doesnt want to take easy on you, you start thinking that maybe I deserve this mess and I am not a useful existent.. I am just a burden, me myself am in a very difficult period at the moment so I think I can understand your heart feelings, by the way there is always hope and I hope the good events will come to you soon, keep in touch and be brave
My friend called me this morning to see how I was. She said she was a bit worried about me last night (apparently I was miserable, and that's not like me!)
My problem just now is that because I am not working at the minute, I seem to have too much time on my hands (even though I spend a lot of time walking, reading, tending to ironing, washing etc and I must have the cleanest house in Scotland for the time I spend cleaning, it leaves me with a lot of time to spend just "thinking" and probably thinking of the worst case scenario most of the time). Sometimes I am planning my day hour by hour so that by the time I go to bed I can say I have at least DONE something. Sundays were never a good day for me anyway but being in this position I find them ten times more depressing.
I'm sorry, here I am being miserable again.
Please know that I know I am not the only one with problems, if you fancy a chat or just want to let off a bit of steam, you know where I am..XX
How are you today? Sorry for late response, my dad is in hospital and this subject takes a lot of our time and energy so if you receive late it is becuase of what I said above but I will reply definitely, it is good that your friend called you just to check how you were.. and hey I am sure you are not miserable, believe me you are not like that. At the moment I dont have any job too and I thoroughly get what you are saying about those massive free but devastating times!
I got your point you must have the cleanest house at the time you do the cleaning stuff because it keeps you busy and keeps the bad thoughts away for a while.. Yup weekly holidays are the worst around, in my country they are fridays and I hate them too because on fridays sunset I think the bad ways possible just like what your scenarios are all about.
En1234 I dont know your first name but you should know you werent miserable I never saw it that way.
Of course you are not the only one with problems plus definitely I am in.. I would like to have chats with you.. I need it specially at the moment, and I am here too.
Xxx
Bye for now
Ps: I know my english is not good and proper like yours
Hello there! My own name by the way is "Theresa"...
I hope you are OK today and that your dad is OK as well. My friend's mother was taken into a Care Home too recently and she is heartbroken. She goes to visit her and because she has dementia, she hardly recognises my friend anymore. It is so sad when one of your parents becomes ill. They say life goes round in a circle. When we are babies our parents are the ones who look after us but as our parents get older, we have to start looking after them (sometimes like babies).
I have been out walking a lot lately over the last couple of days as the weather has been so lovely here. Yesterday the sky was very blue, there was not a cloud to be seen at all and the sun was warm, it was actually more like a summer's day than Spring. Today was just as good except there were a few more clouds in the sky.
I took a few photos of the mountains with my camera because it was so clear. I am very lucky in that I have the most beautiful view where I stay. Some of the mountains across the water still have snow on them and some of them don't look as though the snow has actually touched them. Very weird.
All in all these simple things made me feel very happy and very content. (And it was all free!!)
Hope you are well today. Sending you a massive big hug!!..
What a nice name do you have and in the meantime my name is Ehsan
Today I am in hospital beside my dad, he is getting better step by step and of course not so quickly because of his age, Last night I wasnt feeling well but U had to rest properly for today, we are going to stay all day beside my dad for a few days. Here we are in the second day of first month of the spring season, currently we are spending the new year holidays, we call it Nowrouz. Nothing more for now, keep looking at small, simple and as you said free things to be happy and positive.
I want you to pray for my dad to gain his health soon again.
I am pleased your dad is getting a bit better. Sometimes it is better to recover slowly. My mum goes to Chapel a lot and is always lighting candles for me and other family members. I will ask her to light a candle for your dad too. I don't go to Church or Chapel but say my own prayers. I will send up a wee prayer for you and your dad!!
(Remember you have to look after yourself too).
I am going to Tesco to buy my herbal tea. I don't know if you like herbal tea but anything with Ginger in it is good for you. I like Ginger herbal tea.
I have not heard anything yet from the jobs I have applied for but I think it may still be early days.
First and foremost I have to thank you a lot.. I am really really gratefull for your heart warming message, for your prayers and your mom candle.. I thank you both. But Theresa I am not feeling good today, actually today was a terrible one, I was in hospital.. taking care of my dad and we suffered both a lot! That was a really really bad day for me and for my dad too, I dont know how to explain it but the main issue today was all about his urethral catheter which it wasnt go easy for us. Theresa I want to bring up what I feel right now, sorry but that is how I feel, I feel extremely exhausted, desperate, under pressure and angry, today I said I dont really have much fuel in my tank to continue anymore, I have encountered with some harsh and very difficult days in my recent life and I think maybe I cant take it anymore, I am somehow without any real motivation at the moment except my mom who I am sure she would ger hurt the most if something happens to me, you know I am really on the edge, maybe we will talk about it more when you had enough time and longing to hear..
I thank you again and I am gladly here waiting for your response
I am so sorry to hear you are not coping very well today. I hope that maybe tomorrow will be a better day and that it will bring you some peace. That's really all we want isn't it, just some peace.
Have you got your own GP that you see? I think if you need to (and I think you do need to), you should make an urgent appointment and tell him/her everything you have just told me. They will know best what do you for you. Having to look after your dad must be very stressful. As much as you love him it is taking its toll on you. Do you have any brothers or sisters or any other family members on either your mum or your dad's side that can help you?
Try and take some time out just for YOU. You may think you are being selfish but you are NOT. You need to spoil yourself and need to build up both your physical and mental strength. Even if it something simple like lying in a nice bubble bath or reading a good book for a couple of hours or just going for a long walk to clear your head (I find this one especially helps me - getting some head space is good). I am sure the doctors and nurses are doing what they can for your dad but just remember you are not Superhuman and can only do so much.
Remember try and get some time to yourself, and especially try and get a good sleep. When you don't get a good sleep you can see things differently to how you would normally if you HAD a good night's sleep, so this is really important too.
Keep me posted on how you and your dad are getting on...........
Sorry if my last response made you unhappy.. Yeah I am struggling to cope with the late events in my life especially my dad illness, today I was in hospital and tomorrow I will be here too, my dad is getting well according to what doctors say.. But very slowly and this tensive process( about 12 days already and 10 more days in hospital and sth about 2 months in addition to recover his guts and mind in home made me sad, unhappy, impatient and tired; I know he is my dad and I owe him a lot but afterall I am not good right now.
Yup the thing is very stressful.. Thank you for understanding me, you know I live with my dad and somehow we are connected to each other now so exactlly it is taking its toll on me plus I have a brother, sister and even her husband are beside us, also my dad's grand son and before anyone my mom is backing all of us with all she got..
I havent seen any GP upto now and dont worry about me I'm just fine at the moment by the way I am fighting yet.
Actually this holiday I have planned a trip for myself but due to the well explained issue I posponed everything and put my dad's problem in the first priority, but anyway I am trying to take my time too and give myself the needed rest and recovery.
As you said the sleep is very vital to anybody and I am a little bit behind regarding this.
Theresa thank you for being here and giving me strength plus hearing my problems, I would like to hear anything from your side too..
Don't you worry about anything and you certainly did not make me unhappy..If I can be your shoulder to cry on, then you cry away or if it is just an ear and someone to listen, then you talk away for as long was you want to ok?
Its good that you have got other family support but dont be too hard on yourself. Remember in order for you to be strong for someone else you first have to look after yourself, so although your dad is unwell, the person you need to look after first and foremost is you.....If you are not well in yourself then you will be in no position to look after your dad. (Im sorry if that sounds harsh, but this was advice that was given to me before and it is very true, you need to be healthy for both yourself and your dad)...plus he has nurses and hospital staff looking after him as well as you. Who is looking after you?? Thats why you need to try and have a wee "Time Out" now and again and not feel guilty for doing so!! (If I was nearer to you I would take you out for a good old chat over a Hot Chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows, Yummy!!...so why not take yourself out, or with another friend for this!!....Just to forget about the world for a wee while).
I have still not heard anything about the starting date for my "new" job next month so I have decided to continue my job search and see if I can find something else until I hear back from them but apart from that I am fine!!
Please feel free to contact me anytime. Always here!!
Thank you for your nice words, I am trying to get well with this also paying attention to myself too.
You are really helping by listening to me and definitely I need a shoulder to cry on..
I got your message.. I have to be more friendly and helpful toward myself.. this is so true.
Theresa why life has to be this much harsh and difficult sometimes?
For the past 2 and a half years I have gone through a very difficult time full of different bad events.
I need a rest
Hope you finally will find the suitable job, tell me when you have one
Ps: I would love to have a good old chat with you plus all those yummy stuff in the background.. For the time being I dont really have much time to go out and when I am not in hospital I prefer getting rest and get ready for the next day to be in hospital again.
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For some reason today I thought I'm going to call and find out if they have got any definite starting dates yet (after being told someone would call me). So I called and was able to speak to the lady who was there at the interview who said they still did not have a definite date yet but she was going to e-mail everyone (4 of us got positions) next week with an update.
because on fridays sunset I think the bad ways possible just like what your scenarios are all about. 
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