Two black eyes and bruised all over

[Lindslo]

Relationships are weird. Any kind of Relationship.

I'm 20. I'm young. You're probably thinking that.

So why does it feel like I have the energy of an 80 year old.

People can drain you and you can drain them.

I'm sure it gets better or is that just what naive people say.

You go through different relationships and different phases of life and each time it feels like it chips at who you are a bit. You never forget memories. They are triggered by something or someone when you least expect it. After you remember it you either feel like the you're in a huge cocoon of warmth, or you're wishing someone would actually punch you in the f-cking gut. That memory you had actually existed at one point even though it seems like now you could reach out and touch it. I cherish them I run my fingers along them. Its bittersweet.You and that person existed.That moment existed. I am beginning to question if memories are real. Memories from my POV seem real. I step back and try to see that persons POV of the memory. Now I think maybe memories shared hold no weight for anyone because everyones POV is different. Or maybe you just never held any weight for specific peoples memories.

[MAS_Nurse]

Hello Lindslo

Thanks for your post. I am so sorry that you are having a really tricky time. You are obviously coping with a lot and speak so eloquently, that your message may hold support for others too. That is such a positive thing for you to be able to so right now.

Have you seen a doctor to get yourself checked in case of any injuries and also to talk about more support? You may also want to speak about getting yourself more protection. Do you have family and or friends that you can talk to if things are difficult for you? If things are really bad you may need to consider contacting the police who can offer you more advice about protection.

Our pinned posts and topics may hold more advice and information for you.

MIND at mind.org may also offer more support.

This is a supportive community, so our members may have more information for you.

Take care and keep in touch.

[Lindslo in reply to MAS_Nurse]

Thank you , and I'm sorry for causing alarm. I am not and have not been physically harmed.

[Hidden]

Hiya, so sorry to hear about your difficult time. Your post is poetic and also somewhat enigmatic ! I agree relationships can be weird - they can also be either positive and/or negative, healthy/unhealthy. I am genuinely concerned by your reference to 'two black eyes and bruised all over.' If this is a reference to you, then please consider seeking help as a matter of urgency. The posters on this forum are very caring, supportive and possess a wealth of experience and knowledge, so please reach out and take care of yourself, because you are uniquely important.

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

Yes I am puzzled by the two black eyes and bruised all over bit too.

[Lindslo in reply to Hidden]

Sebastian, I agree. My apologies for causing alarm. I'm not and have not been physically harmed.I titled this in reference to how I felt emotionally.

[Hidden in reply to Lindslo]

Oh ok thanks for clearing that up

[Hidden in reply to Lindslo]

Phew ! Big sigh of relief. Thank for clearing that up. Your safety, and that of all the posters here, is of vital importance.

[xxbluexx]

Hi Lindslo,

I believe I can relate to what you’re saying. To me, my life feels as though it went in definite chapters, and it seems as though, in each chapter, I was someone else. The memories I hold of those times, don’t seem like the same “me” I am today. It’s kind of hard to describe, but I know what you mean.