I feel like Ive been pushed/ slipped frighteningly close to the edge. Im being treated for a blood clotting disorder; and have severe tinnitus; brain lesions and cysts, vanishing vision, legs which keep turning purple, swollen hands etc etc.
And this Friday Im going to find out if I have scleroderma as well (which is on average fatal within a couple of years of diagnosis though many folk with it can live a good long time.).
Each time I think I have started to get to grips with what has happned, it gets worse or another condition gets added. And am (maybe not surprisingly) in the throws of severe depresion, anxiety and OCD.
I want to find a wa y back but have been avoiding friends because ... well Im not really sure why. I draw up lists of what to do (eg exercise) and then feel too depresesd to do these things. So thought if I post here a few things i plan to do then I might feel more motivated to do them. Though not sure why.
so here is my list. and will then post iif I have done them.
30 mins exercise a day, meditation once a day, 4 fruit and veg and fish and nuts each day, 8 glasses of water, contact (email or phone) a friend every day, and dont get stressed with follk (however infuriating they are). And do soemthing fun every day even if it doesnt feel fiun for now.
maybe others want to post their lists?