Feel Worthless & Suicidal- Heartbroken

Hi guys! so i am a 20 something year old. Two years ago i met a charming Dr online and we had a long distance relationship since. We had never met in person as he was always working abroad. I know that i should not have let it get to two years but i guess our lives were such that opportunity didn't present it self for us to factor in the time for a personal meeting. We would always video call and talk over the phone WhatsApp every day through out the day. On many occasions he 'ended' it saying he was not interested and blocking me only to come back and apologise. So a month ago he told me to end it because we were completely opposite (we both knew this & he said opposites attract). He said he came from a silver spoon back ground and that he was a spoilt brat, stating that i was somewhat dysfunctional that this wasn't my fault (like that's meant to help, no idea what he meant by dysfunctional)... that he was in his cousins house for the week and that his cousin was going to hook him up with someone and that she's 'fit'. To which my soul went cold. When i questioned this he said he didn't feel the need to tell me, only then saying he is in fact extending his medical training contract and needed to concentrate and told me to not question him and to maintain self respect, because i was asking him why his turned so cold all over a sudden. I told him fine and that he made me happy in the two years (he helped me with a lot of medical stuff) to which he just put up a thumbs up emoji. Two years all summed up with an emoji.. no words nothing. Then he changed his number.

His words are bashing around my head which guy says no to a girl because she isn't from a silver spoon background. I have worked so hard to get where i am (qualifying to be a lawyer) my family isn't educated like his all doctors, but it has made me left feeling like crap. I shared many things with this Dr but i feel i wasn't good enough for him. I placed my happiness in him don't ask me why..i just did I adored him. He knew this.

Last week i planned to hang myself but the thought of my mother stopped me. I have always been told by guys that i am not enough for their families that i wont fit into their casts or families. Its words that are killing me. I have lost so much self confidence, been put on anti depressant and getting CBT therapy soon. How can a doctor with 'values' talk like that to someone.

I know i sound like any other heartbroken girl but i really feel so unworthy

[DMM218]

What an absolute fool of a man. He has treated you terribly. I am appalled at his behavior. I don't care what caste or class or group or family or job he has - nothing about any of that gives him the right to play with your emotions and cast you of with such spite and cruelty.

This man has no respect for women. It's not just you he has offended but the entire sex. Women are equal with amazing talents and abilities, not a plaything, not a sex object.

This man will make a terrible husband unless he finds a woman as vain and shallow as he is.

Darling girl this mans behavior is nothing about you except he knows in his heart that you are too good for him. His attempts to destroy your lovely personality shows that. He is scared of you because you are everything he is not. Hardworking, kind, humble, intelligent, good.

He is a thief wearing a rich mans cloak.

If I was his mother I would be so ashamed of him.

A real man respects and honors women. He treats everyone the same with courtesy and politeness. It's not for show but a genuine wish to treat people well.

Lose no more tears on this rich but poor charlatan. Nothing is true about him. He is a mask and only thinks of himself and material things.

Pity him. He has no maturity and will remain a child all his life.

You will meet someone worthy. I do not think you have done anything wrong except been your lovely self with s gentle, open heart.

Learn from this. Waste no more time on it. Look for signs of inner goodness and kindness in a man. Trust me, he has shown you all that is false.

Let me know how you are doing. Heartbreak is terrible but do not blame yourself for his lies and deceits. No matter what do not speak to him again. This is his true face and it's ugly. X

[DMM218 in reply to DMM218]

If feeling suicidal just message me and we will talk. You are young, heartbreak happens but heals with time. Think of all the criticism you have endured and know they only reflect the prejudice of the speaker and not your charms. Believe me, you are worth so much more. Make it your purpose to live a good life with maturity and respect for all. The sight of you happy in a true marriage will make these bad suitors sick of what they lost.

You have done so well qualifying as a lawyer. Take pride in yourself.

[DMM218 in reply to DMM218]

Btw from quick glimpse of photo you are beautiful too!

[Hidden in reply to DMM218]

aww thank you x

[Hidden]

He also told me to go look for a divorcee because apparently i am getting too old

[Hidden]

Thank you DMM128 your words are so comforting. I feel so broken, thank you i will keep in touch, i have not yet qualified as a lawyer i am in the process. I will read your post when i am feeling my worst x

[DMM218 in reply to Hidden]

Please do or message me or post. I was a lawyer from poor background so I know how tough it is. At 20, you are still young, divorcee no way that's where dr fake charm will end up.

Being a gentleman isn't dependent on social class - I've met many rich poor etc. Dr man is truly a monster he'd never make you happy.

If you read Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen it shows these idiots preyed on good girls even in the 18th century! If not got novel - Ang Lees film of the book is spot on. Watch it x

[MAS_Nurse]

Hello Haj 1, I am sorry you are having such a difficult time. Your self confidence will improve with time. The antidepressants and CBT will help with this. You have done so well and have achieved so much. Do keep posting on the forum to talk to others who understand. Best wishes.

[Hidden]

Hi I am wondering if he really is a doctor, and if he is married? Who knows online? I agree with the others - you are well rid of this horrible man. How dare he treat you like that? What a loser. You deserve much better than this and now you are free to find it. x

[Hidden]

Hiya, you deserve to be treated with respect, love, dignity and kindness and in any relationship you should feel valued - accept nothing less from anyone, ever ! Take care,

[TheGentleGiant]

Haj1, Where to start? First I must say please never ever speak to that horrible man-child ever again. It is clear that he is selfish, self centered and very immature. He never deserved you in the first place. I also agree that you are very beautiful.

My wife left me nine years ago and at that time I was suicidal but I have learned over the years that noone and I mean noone is worth taking your life over. This is just your heartbreak hurting you so deeply but time does really heal. You will learn from this. Also being in your twenties, you have your whole life ahead of you. Disregard everything that fool put in your head.

Long distance relationships are very difficult and rarely work out. You deserve someone you can spend time in person with. Don't be fooled by this so called doctor. His actions speak volumes as to his poor character. Keep posting because we care about you and you deserve true love and happiness!

[Hidden in reply to TheGentleGiant]

Thank you

[Danniikla]

No 1 who makes you feel that way is worth it. Time is a healer and going to go and cbt is a great decision. Good luck. U will be fine xxx