Feeling anxious: After a lot of stops... - Mental Health Sup...

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Feeling anxious

Busylizzie65 profile image
13 Replies

After a lot of stops and starts I'm finally moving house tomorrow... and I'm horribly anxious about it and feeling quite tearful. It's been a really difficult few months and the last few weeks have been particularly stressful so I'm tired and not coping very well. Mornings are particularly hideous. Anyone got any good coping strategies to help me through the next couple of days?

Thanks, Liz

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Busylizzie65 profile image
Busylizzie65
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13 Replies
Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity

Hi may I ask ?

Why has it been a few bad months to start with.

Yes I do have some coping strategies for you,

Your feeling tearful ?

Because ur leaving ur original home ?

More anxious and depressed symptoms come out at xmas and moving house.

There is more stress because of expectations for what if your house isn't good enough omg what colour do you paint it,can you really afford it,have you had blow ups with ur partner ?

Send me a pm of you wanna chat in private at what's happened in the last few months of you like.

I'm around most of the day.iqt not see it for a few mins

Be positive it's not really that bad 😁

Busylizzie65 profile image
Busylizzie65 in reply toTiggerakafidgity

I suffer from chronic depression and don't cope well with change so I guess I'm scared of leaving my "safe" home (although my head knows I've definitely made the right decision). And the last few months have been hard because I've had a couple of horrible depression flare ups and the house move has been particularly problematic. So I'm already under par and don't have any energy to deal with the next few days!

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity in reply toBusylizzie65

Ok so you've just said in brackets you know your mind has made the right decision yer.

So now you need to inforce this thinking which is very positive to begin with.

Sitting down with a piece of paper and writing a list of things that your POSITIVE BRAIN is thinking.

Now here is the good bit.

Now what ur gonna do is burn this piece of paper after you have written your list. Omg please don't burn ur old home.i declare I have no involvement in how you burn your paper ok lol.

Burning the paper means no one else can see what ur thinking so the idea is that you are totally honest with ur self.

So now do the same again but don't burn it.

Now,next to each positive write what makes that happen,try write 1-3 answers.

.now read each answer once you've finished and you should have an ah ha moment and change your mind in to even more positive thinking.

I do this on a wipe board. But I do clouds next to each answer with 1-3 answers then I'll take those three answers from each line and so the effect goes on until you get the root of the cause.only then can you deal with the problem/issues properly.

Sorry bit long winded. Doesn't take much energy but I know when your brain won't even let you pick up a pen or even turn the tv remote on

I hope this helps but Rome wasn't built in a day.

So push ur self to be more positive.

As hey new house new beginning.

Go out get some colour charts

DMM218 profile image
DMM218 in reply toBusylizzie65

I always walk round the old house when it's empty and say thanks in my head. I tell myself I no longer need this home. It's a way of separating yourself from the physical place. I also think that I'm leaving a place that taught me something, leaving that negative energy and moving on to a blank space which can be positive.

Bit hippy chick but hey it might help. Sometimes we rush from one thing to another without a disconnect and we keep getting pulled from where we should be.

Photogeek profile image
Photogeek

Hi Liz I went back to your orginalpost to see your back Story, otherwise I wouldn't know what the problem is.

Now two things strike me, when we are Depressed we worry a lot more than other people, and we get anxious much more easily. If you feel your Depression is not getting better then I would discuss it your Dr . Antidepressants can help but they are not a magic bullet and we need to help ourselves by doing lots of things to help ourselves feel better. Eating a good nutritious diet most of the time, taking excercise and doing some things we enjoy , a hobby or reading a good book, taking a pampering bath, painting our nails, these little things and stuff like this help me a lot and I know now that antidepressants get you back on the pitch as it were, but after that it's up to me to make an effort.

Try and see your move as positive as you are downsizing and this alone will help your budget etc and that should help. Moving is stressful but you will get there.

The job thing is a different kettle of fish, I would think that you would be better going to a part time job first, as it's a big jump from self employed to a full time job ( when you suffer from Depression).

These are just a few thoughts and they may help as I can see you are very anxious.

Good luck with move.

Hannah.

Busylizzie65 profile image
Busylizzie65 in reply toPhotogeek

Thanks Hannah

I've shelved the job idea so that's one worry less. And I've only got one more day of misery - tomorrow's moving day - before I can relax a liitle and start to enjoy the next stage in my life. So I do know things will get better, it's just hard getting there right now.

Photogeek profile image
Photogeek in reply toBusylizzie65

Lizzy wishing you the best of luck tomorrow and I will be thinking of you. Let us know how it goes. Good luck and ,ind yourself.

Hannah

DMM218 profile image
DMM218

Hey, I've read the other posts and they make good points. Moving house is stressful and difficult. Why?

Because you are physically moving so much stuff. Even if you have removal people. You have gone through everything you own. I bet that brought up memories feelings etc.

So without knowing it you have a major 6 week period of physical, emotional and mental work.

Add to that the emotional connection to your home, your safe place, then the fear of the unknown as it's a new start. Well that's enough to blow anyone's emotions to pot.

It's really difficult especially if already got mental illness.

Be prepared for the feelings to hit and overwhelm you. Don't try to block it out or soldier on but stop and listen to your emotions accept them and get up and move on.

Perhaps if you have time try some guided meditation or relaxing techniques. There may be stuff on you tube. Lie down and give your 30mins listening and relaxing. If you can still your mind before the moving very good.

Finally the move will be done in a day. It's only a short time. Settling into house will take longer but little bit at a time. It's important not to rush and overture your self.

Take care and hope you enjoy new home soon.

Hi it's very stressful moving home but it will soon be over. Concentrate on how you will feel once you are in and this should help.

When I move home I get the kettle, telly, and bed organised then trot off to the pub to get blotto. Then I start dealing with the rest of it the next day. It works.

DMM218 profile image
DMM218 in reply to

Yeah and a history of walking back to old home! I can see you know trying to get keys into the lock whilst singing some Robbie Williams to yourself! Only joking - a few drinks to celebrate move and wind down very useful.

in reply toDMM218

It is. I find I can then let go of the stresses and strains of the move and get it all out of my system. :)

Having said that I last moved 21 years ago and it was so stressfull I decided never to move again!

DMM218 profile image
DMM218 in reply to

I've moved quite a lot and it never was a problem but last move last year that floored me. Although I had a bad year so maybe was cherry on top of stress sundae

We found it was the best way to never return to our old address

Our new home was a trial as we purchased two places together and adapted them for my disability. Now my old home is a distant memory as are all the problems associated with it.

A new door has opened in your life, enjoy the newness and forget all old problems you may have had before the move. Enjoy the clean, new start and enjoy a new clean break and associated DIY to make your home a part of you and family.

BOB

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