Really starting to think bipolar

Firstly, I can guess what most answers are going to say but firstly, I hate going to the doctors and maybe Im just over thinking.

My mood swings are out if this world. My bio father told me almost 2 years ago that he has bipolar. But hes also a huge compulsive liar and weve since cut ties. Anyway, as soon as i have a thought i can never let it go. So ive been questioning since, if i have bipolar too.

Firstly, I have s*** life syndrome. Which basically means, everything that could possibly go wrong with my life, has. (Except, i've never experience a close family death or an accident.) My family is full with mental disorders depression, anxiety, paranioa, autism, and a lot of drama. There is drug problems on my mums side (lets not dive into it)

Secondly, what leaves me to believe i have bipolar is ive always had mental illnesses. Mostly, anxiety and depression. Which was all fine until september (I had a crisis) and i felt myself going down. I quit college, but I did all of the coursework (I didnt think i was going to quit until I did). I never have jobs for very long, because one day i wake up Nd my anxiety kicks in. I wanted to go out today, so i ran a bath and then i was having suicidal thoughts. Which feel better now btw.

Anyway, there is a really big trigger that set me off but I wont say what it is. But then part of me is just telling myself im making this bipolar up and nobody would believe me. Ive tried talking to people and theyve just said 'no, i dont think you do.' Maybe im just feeling a bit depressed


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3 Replies

  • I think I have bipolar too and like you my life stinks and always goes wrong.

    Each day become a bigger hurdle and more difficult .. I know how this feels

    I keep wanting to go to the doctor and get more help as I am on mirtizapine 15mg at the moment and need more help. I guess asking for help is my easy when your ill x

  • The only answer I can suggest to your query is to Go to your Dr. No one here can tell you if you have BiPolar, so why not put yourself out of the misery of Do I ? Dont I ? stuff and get a proper diagnosis.

    Then You can begin to deal with what is rather than imagining this that and the other. Good luck anyway.


  • Please...want to or CAN do it. You CAN go to the Dr... If you want to get rid of what you have and start reaching for a 'normal' life' this is a must... You may just have extreme depression and anxiety... Both of those CAN be helped by meds. Plus, I believe what is equally important is that you ask your doctor is you can start visit with a Therapist... You can be open and honest without being judged. Most of them have 'heard it all!' :)

    It is up to you now, to take those steps to help yourself. You KNOW and everyone else knows...YOU ARE WORTH IT...So, please, be kind to yourself and help yourself. Take care and best wishes.