My life is run by my health issues

[Catmag]

So it's 05:00 and I'm still awake. I hate how my life is dictated by my health. I know that many of us are on theone or more sites on HealthUnlocked. I am on Pain Concern, Action on Depression & National Migraine Centre.

So here's what I hate.

I hate:

having to ask for help

not being able to make plans

having to explain why I need help or can't go out

how my meds make me feel

that sometimes the best I can do is just get out of bed

that my logical mind has gone off & left behind an emotional mess

that my sense of humour has abandoned me

when doctors say "I don't like the word coping"

that I am not the person I was

Dishes.

I'm sure many of you can relate. And at least through these forums I (we) know we're not alone. Thanks for being there.

Hope everyone has as good a day as possible....I'll no doubt sleep through most of it now!

Cheers, Catherine.

[Mandy6513]

Hi honey, here is what i read from your post

Your independent

Your willing to learn new techniques and coping tools

Your willing to learn better communication skills

Your aware of how your body feels

Your willing to take it a step at a time

Your aware that you do have the ability to make right choices

Your aware you need to laugh more

Your willing to take more control of your life

Your willing to make an even better you

YOUR FUUNY :)...I make my daughter do the dishes x

[Catmag in reply to Mandy6513]

Thanks Mandy.

I should know by now that 05:00 is a bad time to write a post. Every seems doom & gloom, especially on no sleep.

Thanks for the encouragement.

Cheers, Catherine.

[Mandy6513 in reply to Catmag]

At 5am we feel like there is nobody else alive..I get out of bed no matter what time it is rather than let those thoughts grab me, i will even come down stairs and put a funny film on , you will be surprised how well you feel after watching a film that make you laugh

..Day by day honey x

[Kjb1980]

Hi Catherine I'm sorry your feeling like that but your post has really made me feel better as in "great it's not just me" I have all those thoughts and it frustrates the hell out of me. So after a few weeks I decide to say " I need help" I feel so tired, I can't get out of bed, I can't because of my depression come out and so on"

I was beating myself up as I couldn't and didn't want to feel how I do and wanted to be "me" again. So that was making me more frustrated and adding a downer I didn't need. Have you got much support ?x

[Catmag in reply to Kjb1980]

Thanks. I am lucky, I do have a lot of support. It's still difficult to ask for it.

I agree though it's good to know I'm not the only one with these thoughts.

Take care. Catherine.

[Hidden]

Hello Catherine

Like you on occasions I contribute on Pain Concern, as I suffer from Chronic Pain. Also I suffer from negative thoughts as I have suffered from Chronic Pain and associated Reactive Depression. I have had this condition since about 1983 and as like you I get really fed up.

Now I am awaiting for yet more tests for dementia, although it could be my body is just slowing down and is tired as I am sixty five.

One thing I feel, have been learned every one generally expects us to get on with it and generally they can not understand why we are not strong enough to control chronic pain and feel we are weak willed.

Now I feel what is the point I have gone through all pain courses via Pain Clinic and other departments to many to remember.

Of course we do get to the point of balking when further treatment regimes are offered and this then upsets those Specialists who have little to offer and would I feel would not want to undergo their Offering. This can and does cause problems for patients who have all gone through the same tests and treatments long before.

Generally I feel the need to accept my Lot and try and remain positive, unlike you I have given up writing poems or making lists, I make the error of questioning why me or what if and understand that I have been given that cross to bare.

All I can say is be strong and accept your will is stronger than those people who are so very healthy

BOB

[Catmag in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Bob.

Appreciate the input.

Take care, Catherine.

[deejames]

Hi Catherine. How about making another list àof what you like / love , just to balance your thinking out. I find that helps me, the thinking about the positives.

Dee

[Catmag in reply to deejames]

Thanks Dee.

It was 05:00, never a good time, everyone else is asleep and it's lonely. Was venting a bit.

Cheers, Catherine.