Why Sir you call me a pendant! I shall have my satisfaction! M&S Cream buns at dawn! Cream mind none of your piano chocolats!
Thank you, but Im feeling a bit sorry for myself, somewhat between a rock and hard place, I have chosen to ignore issues sweep them under the carpet and rant on about irrelevant stuff instead.
You are the BEST Hannah! You always make everyone feel better. I just make them feel like maybe they are sane after all, they spend enough time with me...lol.
Why is it that running away always presents itself too me as the BEST EVER idea...lol. Maybe I really am Reginald Iolanthe Perrin re-incarnated after all, nope Im not as smart as him
I told my psychiatrist that I avoid big things (run from them), & focus on trivia. He said that was because the problem solving part of my brain was hard at work looking to fix the big stuff, so I could only manage trivia!
How do you like them apples? I think I'm the mad one here!
Take care & don't be so hard on yourself. Catherine.
I loooove that saying ...'How do you like them apples? ' , reminds me of Billy Crystal who is sooo funny. I may have to nick it!
Great what a fabulous idea your psychiatrist sounds tops.
Maybe we should have a top 10 list of the most bonkers..lol.
You and could fight out the number one spot with pink Gladioli ! One of us can be Morrisey and the other one Alan Bennet. Did you ever see that documentary where they said Morrissey only uses and fax and one of the few people he faxes is Alan Bennet...lol.
I dont have a fax young Katie but I do have two empty tins of baked beans and a piece of string! Are you in
You'll have to speak up a bit dearie, it's aye windy up here!
I hadn't seen the response string to your original (I mean that in both senses of the word) what a hoot you lot were having & I missed all the fun.
Since Bob is in charge of music, can I be the choir mistress please? I promise not to be too Jean Brodie with you all, but the altos and sopranos need to stay in their own groups! Girls, girls pay attention.
As for top 10 mad? What criteria are we using? Oh sorry, pheasants probably don't have criteria. Should we decide based on bird seed brand?
Thanks for all the banter & laughter fair cheered me up.
Criteria now there a word that could easily turn into Critters.
I dont know what makes a person truly Bonkers, the Victorians believed you could tell if someone was bonkers by the shape of their head and or what they looked like. This may require a new post young Catherine .....I SAY I SAY .... THIS MAY REQUIRE A NEW POST ( dont forget to batten down the hatches with all that wind!).
X
Hello Caroline,
Sorry you are so upset it must be something in the water or should I say wind. ????
Last night with a storm up here a one hundred foot tree crashed down over fence and garage, we were lucky that there was little damage and the farmer came and took the strain although the weight nearly overturned trying to move the thing out of the garden.
So am I offered one of those lovely cream cakes, both of us need tea and sympathy.??
Living in the country, BAH HUMBUG !!!!
BOB
Hello Caroline,
Sorry you are so upset it must be something in the water or should I say wind. ????
Last night with a storm up here a one hundred foot tree crashed down over fence and garage, we were lucky that there was little damage and the farmer came and took the strain although the weight nearly overturned trying to move the thing out of the garden.
So am I offered one of those lovely cream cakes, both of us need tea and sympathy.??
Ha Ha you made me laugh out loud...Im probably the Phartridge.
Anyone know how to post photos up here. If you didnt see the Metro today there were some very funny cartoons in reply to the French assassinations, very witty. Terrible tragedy but what a wonderful reply.
For example the tag line on one was a terrorist standing over the body of an cartoonist saying "He drew first"...lol.
And my personal favourite a number of Kilagnikofs (or how ever you spell them) pointed at a pencil!
Amanda....I do hope your doing your homework All joking aside hope all is well in the ole mind work.
All well here lovely........ Glass of red, Sherlock on the box, mindfulness schmindfulness......... homework awaiting as had mother probs to deal with. I was very manipulative/diplomatic - depending on your point of view......... Big hug to you (((((()))))) x
That sounds like the beginning of a traditional ole folk song Bob!
By jove youve got it....
There was a young farmer , who capture a tree I dont why he captured a tree, the was an ole farmer who ate a cream pie, I dont why he ate a cream pie, while wealding a saw....daaaddddardydaaa.....oh an chasing a Pheasant!
I never knew you were musical Bob. I think we should hand over the making of songs to you! What a talent you have
Don't ask me WHY she has taken to wearing Victorian skirts she has a mind like a steal trap!
Actually I just watched 'Albert Nobbs' (don't watch it its depressing!) and thats all scullery maids and like.
Amanda the only reason you'd be discussing stuff like that is because YOU'D be the lady of the house. I would be the scruffy urchin.... "spare £200 m'lady for a cuppa char", (What, I didn't say I was cheap!)...lol. AND I can sign me name
Tell me something oh fisher of minds.... apart from Anti-depressants is there a pill you can take that would have the same effect as a (good) therapy session but in less time. Maybe blue or yellow in colour like a Smartie. And once one had taken one, would one be cured of any vestige of depression or unhappiness.
No I am not taking about major pain killers, opium or LSD...lol
I know what you're going to say punching pillows or hugging kittens....arrrgggg
Amanda I do hope you wash your hands before you fillet about in brains, I hope they teach you BOTH cleanliness and Godliness at school
I am often told to mind my scalpel at school but that's another story...ha ha
Oh if only t'were that simple I would be a millionaire Rodney! I keep a very clean establishment I'll have 'e know and there's none's more God-fearin' than I as my use of apostrophes and apostles clearly show......... ahhhh..... you and your scalpel ....... I was wondering when we'd get round to THAT incident x
So no pills eh, can you bang your clients on the head with a mallet in the way you used to bang old TV's on the top to get them working?
Just a thought.
As for apostrophes, I know where they go but most of the time I cant be bothered to get them out of the draw or speech marks but as you know I always have time for apostrophise!!! Every one likes a Trophy!
Today I was told at school as of now I must watch my P & Q's in essays, no more sherking on spelling, speak marks or grandma.....sooo mean, Im dyslexic for heaven's sake its what Im supposed to do!!
I blame Dr Johnston, why could he just stick to making baby oil and the like...grrr
My head hurts.............. ! Tis nearly the witching hour so me and my analytical brain must have a break from this interlude of merriment and mirth. Hang on in there my lovely....... and in the words of St Julian of Norwich.............errrrr.......... oh whatevvah................. catch ya very soon xx
Kevin as you know the Twilight Zone and I are good bedfellows, even I dont understand whats going on. All I know is I have create this mess and I have to clean it up...lol.
Gone are the days when you could use untraceable poison, change your name and open a hat shop in another country. It is a time of new solutions Im afraid and try though I might I have hit a stumbling block...lol.
Hope your good days out weigh the bad young Kevin. May your God go with you and as the Irish say may the road rise to meet you
you know what stumbling blocks are? there the ones that need more of a kick to move i hope you get it all sorted out.
i came to realise that my god wouldnt have put these onsticles in my way if he didnt think i could cope. it might not be everyones solution, but sometimes it helps me cope more. take care you funny lady. i hope all goes well x
Dress Dress I did say Victorian 'Dress'... though how you cope with all those petticoats getting on and off bus's? But defend your right to be a purist
Bus? I am a posh victorian lady and would certainly never use a bus! Only Hackney cabs if you don't mind or even shank's pony. Bev xx
Hiya Caroline the mad! What's up chuck? You can tell aunty Bev you know
Am watching film about Wyat Earp - it's fascinating. Did you know he died in 1929? He loved watching cowboy films at the cinema. Then I got to googling Doc Holliday. He was a cousin by marriage to Margaret Mitchell the author of Gone with the Wind. Bet you didn't know that!
Wonder if doc is related to Billie Holliday? Now that's a thought.
No I didnt know that but did you know that Valerie Kilmer was not at all sexy or even much of an actor to my mind UNTIL saw him play Doc Holiday in Wyat Earp! I love it when he says "I'll be your daisy"....phew is it hot in here...lol.
Im okay thanks, I have a big day a head, wont say why but if you could will your good thoughts and good luck towards me that would help heaps
Did you see Bev...Amanda was talking about you! (Wasskle) read up...or was it MEEEE....No never me Im squeaky ...lol.
LOVE YOU BEV....LOVE YOU!
X
Lots and lots of good luck chuck and lots of good thoughts coming your way. Millions of them and trillions of them luck luck luck luck luck luck luck luck thoughts thoughts thoughts thoughts thoughts good good good good good Bev xxx
I don't know WHERE you all get it from - the banter and humour I mean - but wherever it came from it entertains me and has me in awe, makes me smile a bit too. x
Excellent, thats is the plan, young Beverley, Amanda, Hannah, Gemma, Sarah, Sue, Bob, Kev.....etc Are going to take the world over through abserdity. By the time the general public realise we are talking rubbish it will be too tale and we will have been elected! You of course will be in change of Bevs wide range of Victorian dresses and SKIRTS! ...Shes just kidding next she'll say she doesnt Knit all the time or think of kittens!
It's so funny because I some of my French friends support the ie ' I am Charlie' campaign and others say saying they shouldnt have run the toons in the first place and joined the ' I am not Charlie' campaign.
Either way I feel the real tragedy is the families left behind who didnt DO anything to warrant this.
Now about the Bourbons ... maybe we could give them to ole Nigel Farrage....oops did I say that out loud
Well all I can say is I went to school in body and left the brain at home.
The Maths teacher went round the classroom pointing to everyone in turn telling them the grade he predicted them to get in G.C.S.E.-------------////// Here is to some mental scaring,he got to me and said " I wouldn't bother if I was you"!
I have never been popular,any loner who used to hang around with me disappeared after our French class. Yes more mental scaring. I was born in Birmingham and now live in the wetcountry,so bare in mind the accent got in the way.
I was told to say Merci Becoup ( don't even know how it is spelt) and no matter how many times I repeated it he shook his head and said again you need to sound French any way this ran over into break time,the whole class still there and then the bell for the end of break time,well that was nearly the end of me never mind break.
I couldn't run to save my life so I had to go in what ever the P.E group that needed the numbers made up and they would rather have been one down than have me as they all booeeeeeed as I went to their group.
Never mind not to dwell I just can't count up to any more than 10, As for French well I live here,I do not need their language I have my own,as for exercise and physique I now walk with a walking stick.
Any way CarolineLondon you are a breath of fresh air,you probably don't realise but you are making some very depressed people laugh and smile.
Ha ha ha Michelle but I can beat you. From the age of 13 I was ungraded in maths and the teacher would laugh as he told me that. He was a bit of a loony though - to distract him from his teaching some pupils would get him talking about angels rather than angles and he would whitter on for ages.
My parents sent me for private maths tutoring but only went once as the teacher got impatient with me and I clammed up totally Well you would wouldn't you?
I am in the West Country too in South Devon. Where are you? (have a feeling I have asked you this before but have forgotten...)
Maths thats like 2+2=5 right.... well it seems to work like that in relationships
I had to take maths twice, I only passed second time because I was taught by an engineer. Now I could even spell Algerbra let alone tell you what it is or how it works...ha ha.
I am in Torbay and it's such a small world. When you think of the amount of people on the Forum. My 1974 part is my date of birth, I feel older as my eldest son has given me two Granddaughters in the last year.
I had the oldest little one for an hour yesterday which was lovely.
Before her sister was born on New Years Day 2015, we were never offered to take her out etc but now I think they have realised that Phoebe still needs the same attention if not more and you can imagine the work a 10 day old baby creates with just nappy changing and bottles.
We moved to Paignton from the midlands when I was 10 yrs,I found it soooo hard to make friends and I just could not fit in.
Met my Husband when I was 15 yrs so that helped me. Obviously I never thought he would be my Husband but from day one of meeting him we never went one day or night apart until I went in to have our first child.
Where are you in Devon? Was you born here?
Suppose as this has just been chat really we should PM each other.
Sorry think I got confused are you saying this is how things 'were' when you were at school because if you were born in 1974 you've long left school and I don't need to give you practical skills.
Also if you are talking about the past, show me someone who didn't hate PE with a passion and I will show you someone who is tired of life...lol (the real quote is show me someone who is tired of London and I will show you someone who is tired of life) but bastardising quotes is a hobby of mine, plagiarism isn't enough! So what you weren't good at sport don't let other people try and force their values on you. Are you going to lose your job or the prospect of the job because you cant run round the hockey field in under 30 minutes or because you don't win 3 out of 5 netball games, or you cant clear 8 long jumps in a row, who cares, file it under useless information...lol.
Maybe you struggles with maths because you have dyscalculia, I have that, it means we struggle with numbers not because we are thick but because to us its like swimming with one hand tied behind your back! Many people who suffer with dyscalculia are good at higher maths because it is more about patterns. We can grasp complex theories it's just our hard drive isn't running windows 8 and cant read the updated software (for software read language)...lol.
French pronunciation easy get a copy of discs of Michelle Thomas ( he used to teach languages) and taddar couldn't be clearer! Just an aside.
What happened in the past is in the past resolve to lead your life today, you can be sure they wont be worrying about what you think of them these days.
You say scars but don't see them as scars that doesn't help you, see it as something you went through and survived! Hoorah and now you can make your own rules, no crappy teachers telling you what to do. Most secondary school teachers are barking mad, anyone of whom if they were put under psychoanalysis I doubt many would pass...lol. You really dont have to believe what they say, often its just their own warped ideas.
I'm aslo dyslexic which means I have trouble with spelling, missing words out, orientation, reading, left and right you name it. But so what, I have a brain, a tongue in my head and as much right to be here in this life and f**k things up as the next person.
You have survived Michelle and are here to tell the tale, so forget them, file them under people with delusional senses of their own grandeur...fools! Including your classmates.
And remember this we are ALL actually equal because we all come in the same way through birth alone and we all leave the same way through death alone, no one s exempt. So why should anyone feel better than anyone else, we all have the same exact fate
You're doing okay Michelle, slowly try and shed the old stuff, realise a lot of the old baggage holds not truth in it. You are a resourceful, smart, talented human being, if anyone doesn't get that stuff them
BIG KISS
and thank you for your kind comments XX
'I' Of course am the only sane one...now where did I put that Giraffe you know the one with the wings, I have to get its tea on....ha ha.
Thanks for sharing that with me. I do have some ideas thing is people aren't always looking for solutions sometimes they just want to be heard.
Im glad you like my ramblings it brings me some relief at a very hard time in my life.
Ill send you a PM with some ideas and you can let me know your thoughts. Maybe you can implement the practical stuff on the days you feel a little more emotionally strong. Thats the good thing about emotions and life, its ever changing, we have good days and bad days, good moments and bad moments.
Hi,will take a look at my PM's just as soon as can and of course It would be rude not to return a PM wouldn't it and I don't do rude unless I feel the need to.
Does that sound in anyway rude itself ? I managed to put the question mark there without any help.
On a serious note I have a friend from school,who was never bright but I also did not know she was so dim and dumb!
When she sends text messages to me it normally takes a couple of hours to decipher it and then I am left in wonder what was it actually sent for.
She left school to become a lap dancer and it helped her get deposits for the four houses she rents out. Owning a villa in Spain and the bungalow she lives in is more than half hers.
See my problem I never had the body or the brain and apart from that it would have devastated my parents if I became a lap dancer and lady of the night ( they are the private dancers apparently) she had to retire from it after finding herself weighing 20 stones after the birth of her two children both 12lbs in weight.
I promised myself something and that was not to be jealous of anyone but also not to be bitter as I find myself on this Forum due to negligence at the birth of my twins and apart from disabilities it left me very depressed.
I go months and months without going out. There is no pill for every ill as they say but my doctor feels anti this and I am in a circle of taking around 70 tablets a day.
Including the anti depressants that I don't know if they work or not.
I have increased to 60 mg of Prozac each day,I may have already bored you with this already if I have done just put it down to experience and ignore me!
Anyway if you did not know I am depressed with or without the tablets do you think it's time to change my tablet or my life style?
I do enjoy talking as you may have noticed by my 200 word essays I send.
Do take care of oneself and I look forward to boring you again.
P.s I can bore you over the PM's also ,where there is a will there is a way.
I am better than any kind of sleeping tablet or my husband ignores me well
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x
I did a number on myself, didn't I?
I dont understand 
No feeling myself today
Am I actually over dramatic or is that just what I think of myself?
