Is anyone still here?

[emms]

Feeling very alone....

[Stilltrying_]

Hi Emms, I am here for one. Gemmalouise. Weather very wet where I am. Don't be alone; there are people on here to talk to.

[Suzie40]

Hello stranger, I haven't seen you for such a long time. How are things? X

[celtic27465 in reply to Suzie40]

Hi

lucy how are you lately are you feeling better ! Ive had a set back not coping to well at the moment ! Just cant see any end to this ! David

[Suzie40 in reply to celtic27465]

Hi David!

Things still not too good with Mum, but it's too much effort to be miserable. I'm sorry about your setback. Want to talk about it? X

[celtic27465 in reply to Suzie40]

If you have the time yes

[Suzie40 in reply to celtic27465]

Plenty of time

[celtic27465 in reply to Suzie40]

Good did you seey reply

[Suzie40 in reply to celtic27465]

Just replied to uour PM x

[celtic27465 in reply to Suzie40]

My mum still in hospital shes on a care of the elderly ward now which means shes getting much better i worried myself sick and im still at the what if stage ! Im sitting watching tv but im not feeling that great i dont look forward to going to bed anymore but when i get to sleep its the only time i get any relief from how i feel ! I get short panicky feelings even during the day ! Wish i could feel better about myself ! Sorry to unload my feeling on you !

[Photogeek in reply to celtic27465]

Hi David

I think it's natural to be feeling worries and anxious

At this time

Hannah xx

[Ghanem]

Hello Emms

[21esme]

Hello Emms,

Nice to meet you. I'm here.

Sarah xx

[Golfer15]

Hi Emms, Im still here. Hope you are ok.

[Hidden]

Jimi and me are here

Never feel alone in here

[emms]

Its very lonley. Ive been stuck in here again for another 3 months......everybody wants rid of me, including myself, I feel guilty constantly for being here, and making people angry and im just so alone. I cant eat or sleep, or even move very much.

[Suzie40 in reply to emms]

Are you in hospital again? X

[emms]

No, im stuck in my house. I was fined by the hospital for cutting when I was there, as it posed a risk to other patients and staff. And other services have been withdrawn from me. It was a bit better when I went to the walking group, but now ive become stuck in here again. Not sure how to do anything and not wanting to live.

[Suzie40 in reply to emms]

You were fined by the hospital? That's madness! Why were the other services withdrawn? X

[emms]

Yes in the ward I was on cutting wasnt allowed, but I only found out in the post that I got fined. They just shouted at me at the time. Services get withdrawn if you are not getting any better, as councils are making cuts in healthcare. I feel so stupid, and lazy. My house is a mess and a bio hazard, and I cant open my curtains. I stay in bed as much as possible, I really hate myself. If I do sleep I get dreams, which makes waking up harder. Nobody knows what to do I dont think, they want me to move away but I dont know how or where to go

[Stilltrying_]

Oh Emms I am so sorry to hear all of this.

You are not stupid or lazy; you are just struggling which is a feeling many people on here can relate to ; I know I can for sure. You are never alone and people on here understand the kind of things each other are going through.X

[Photogeek]

Hi Emms

Sorry your feeling so alone.

Have things got worse? Or what's been happening.

Hannah xx

[emms]

Nothing has really changed very much, except I dont seem to be able to do anything at all, and am afraid of everyone, dont have anybody to trust, and am so angry with myself.

[emms]

I know the health services have had enough of me. Its taken over four years, and im still like this. I just dont know what to do about it.

[jubilee69]

Hi emms, I'm new on here but I'm here too x there is always someone to trust, you may feel alone but you're really not. Can you get some help sort out your home maybe? That might help you feel bit more in control?? I don't know your history so please ignore my ignorance if this a silly suggestion, it's just I work with people who struggle to maintain their homes yet feel bit better if and when they do. Maybe just a corner of a room? Again, apols if this post is naïve, no offence intended x

[Hidden]

Oh that's awful emms. They can't just withdraw services because you are not getting any better surely? That just shows you need more help than they can give you. That is so callous and wrong! It makes me mad reading what you are going through alone. I wish I lived closer so I could come and give you the biggest loveliest hug in the world. We are here for you anyway sweetheart - you have got some good friends on here. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((emms))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) xxxxxxxxxxxx

[emms]

Thank you. I just dont know what to do next.

[celtic27465]

Emms they cant just remove your help try quoting the mental health act and the human rights act and see if that helps if not your within your rights to sue them for breaching your human right to medical treatment ! Good luck and let me.know how you get on.thank you.!david

[emms]

I still get treatment - Im supposed to be taking medication, although ive become really afraid of asking anyone anything, in fear of being told off, or of being a nuisance. The pharmacy said I need to contact the surgery for more medication, but im finding that very hard on its own; they dont seem to like me at the surgery. I spent a while phoning different surgeries but they are all outside of the zone I live in, so im stuck with the one that doesnt want me. I only have one day left of zopiclone, diazepam, mirtazapine, venlafaxine, and levothyroxine. And I dont even think the thyroxine is making any difference at all. The mirtazapine makes me sleep but makes my dreams even worse and more vivid. I feel like the health services all want me to move away so they dont have to deal with it anymore