My old god complex

[shaynokb]

First of all, hello, after a long time, hope everyone has a good day, today I will tell you about my god complex and I want to explain it and chat with you. I see myself as higher in perception than most people, that is, among the people I know, this is because the people around me always look at life positively and try to enjoy life. Because to me, this life is empty and gray and dark, after all, it has an end and I don't understand why they sometimes take even such simple problems as a problem. We are grains of dust in the universe and I have accepted that life is pessimistic and that's why I get angry. I hope I can explain myself to other people. Anyway, let me continue, my main problem is 1 I started university 5 months ago, I literally feel like a god in high school, I was great, as if I was constantly under the influence of a drug, entertainment, everything, of course, this pessimism was eating me up, but I was enjoying it, I was social, but now I can't even talk. I have had an eye contact problem with people for many years, but my problem of not being able to talk has emerged. Now my voice is literally falling apart, I can't chat, I constantly feel like people are watching me and criticizing me, how can I get over my fear of meeting these people and making eye contact? Is there a name given to my general psychology?

[Amiwrong]

Hi. So you went from inflated ego, to severe social anxiety? What was in between? Did anything happen to make this change? Was it gradual over time, or did something happen? Did someone say something?

Perhaps you used to mask, to overcompensate to hide deep rooted insecurities? Coping from trauma?

I am just throwing thoughts out to you, but I don’t truly know what the issue could be. I do know that my partner saw himself like this, very similar to you it sounds like. I kept telling him that underneath all that there’s insecurities that he is not accepting. He denied that even though to be human is to be insecure. He’s getting better with time, and with me putting him in his place lol.

Oh, and I did rule out narcissism, he didn’t fit the criteria.