Hello everyone

[paul1960]

Still here but not been running for about 3 weeks realy lost it unfortunately my wife as been diagnosed with lung cancer which as knocked us all for six so running as not been important at the moment I have tryed to run but finding it realy hard to run cant believe how hard it is when you have had abit of Time off but the wife said that I must get on with life but I feel so angry and very upset knowing what she is going through I just dont know how am going to carry on any advice would be most appreciated thank you they must be more people on here going through the same thing

[cheekychipmunks Half Marathon]

Oh Paul I’m so sorry. Was awful news, I can’t even imagine it must be like for your poor wife and family.

You must do whatever feels right. Some days you won’t feel like doing anything I’d imagine, but you must look after yourself mentally and physically and stay strong for her. so maybe running could be your way of doing that.

We’re all thinking of her and you Paul.

[roseabi Ultramarathon]

Paul I am so sorry!! Of course you need to spend time supporting your poor wife, but she is right, you must remember to look after yourself too. Perhaps when you start to get your head around things a little more you may find that running will help you. But please take your time and do come here to talk it through as often as you need.

There may well be people on this forum that can share experience with you, but there are a few dedicated communities on Health Unlocked that may be worth your while to join, this one in particular:

Lung Cancer Support: healthunlocked.com/lung-can...

Take care of you, and best wishes to you, your wife, and the rest of your family xxx

[SlowLoris]

Listen to your wife Paul. She needs to know you're ok. When you feel angry find some steep hills to run up. Works for me.

[Sandraj39 Half Marathon]

So sorry to read this Paul - my thoughts go out to you and your family. Lots of good advice has already been given but I would say, run when you are ready and when you feel you can. Do it for you. The forum that roseabi mentions may help you find some support through all this - take care.

[linda9389 Administrator Marathon]

Oh my! That's such shocking news, and so much for you all to try to get your heads around. It will take time, a lot of time. For now you need to be kind to yourself, try not to get frustrated if things that were once easy are now a major challenge. You all need time to adjust to your new situation. I'm sure running will provide solace again, and when the time comes you will know. Sending very best wishes to you and all your family as you go through this incredibly difficult time. Take good care.

[TailChaser Marathon]

So sorry Paul. Your wife is right though, keep healthy and keep running. It will help you as much mentally as it does physically (I suspect you know that anyway) and you can take it out those hills. All the best to you and your wife.

[Decker Ultramarathon]

That is really rough Paul. Hope you can eventually leverage the running to help you work through some of this when you are ready. Don’t stress about the running for now just do what you need to do for your wife and yourself.

[Irishprincess Administrator Half Marathon]

That’s very tough Paul, I’m so sorry. Lots of great advice already but make sure you both have lots of support around you, not just medical but from friends and family too. Now is the time to lean on them.

Run when you feel like it but try to keep to some kind of routine, that way you’ll feel a little in control.

[Katnap Marathon]

A short 10 minutes jog is better than no run. Take care and best wishes to you both 💞

[misswobble Marathon]

Oh Paul, I’m so sorry to hear your news I wish you all the very best and send loving, positive vibes your way 🙂. It can’t be easy for you and your family right now

Staying positive for your wife, and your own health, is necessary though so do take good care,and get out for that jog. Punch that lunch bag too! 👊

[Oldfloss Administrator]

Paul, just picked up a link on the Cancer support forum from the link roseabi gave I think...... I am so, so sorry, and cannot begin to imagine your feelings.

Take her advice, try and stay strong and support your wife by listening to what she says... knowing you are staying fit and healthy will help her too, to get through these hard times.

Sending you all thoughts and good wishes xx

[RunSkippyRun Half Marathon]

Hi Paul, sorry to hear your news. We have a similar issue only I have the cancer and my partner who has the other burdens of the situation. For me there are similar feelings to what you say your wife wants: whilst it's horrible having the diagnosis and the worry /fear what helps me a lot is carrying on and trying to be normal. It's two years now since diagnosis and I've exceeded what my first consultant said in terms of life expectancy - I'm really lucky there but it's also been a good two years in terms of us both having fun and doing stuff. There's also been a load of rubbish times of course and what's helped here has been support groups, I would also recommend Macmillan and also the Maggies centres if you have one near you. Good luck and best wishes to you both.

[Deals1 Metric Marathon]

Hi Paul. Sorry to read this.

Sending posive vibes and virtual hugs.

Your runs may help u both, as u need to look afer yourself too.

Take care

[Irish-John Marathon]

For some of us men, it's awfully hard to seek help, it can feel like a form of "self pity" or "I'm not an adult" or "Men should be tough and I'm not" - and as for seeking help and advice in a group setting, wow

However, the best advice I feel it's appropriate to offer and that I'm qualified to give because been there and done that and it saved me a world of more pain anguish desperation and heartbreak , is to try and find a Support Group for people going dealing with what you must do.

Nobody is so tough, wise, adaptable or any other 'coping mechanism trait" that they can take a hot like that in their own and remain unbroken. The pooled wisdom, support, emphaty and experience of a group however is immensely helpful and comforting.

I wish you and your good lady every good thing possible, wish I could do more. Best wishes.

[Hidden]

Hi Paul

Really sorry to hear this sad news. Anger is a very understandable response, but I am sure this is part of a process and will pass. No doubt in the coming months you will feel sad and angry and hopeful and despairing and accepting. . .

There is no right or wrong way of doing this but I hope that, in time, running will play a part in establishing some equilibrium and managing your emotions.

All the best to you and your family x