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Am I being unreasonable?

Hi everyone. I’m after some advice. I work for a company who every 12 weeks make me cover another branch on a Saturday on top of my normal full time hours. I have psoriatic arthritis and ankylosis spondylitis and they are querying lupus. I was told to go to my manager if I found I was struggling and she was supposedly meant to contact the other manager to say I needed to be able to sit, take rest breaks and not have to go upstairs. Previous times I’ve been made to stand for 5 hours so I asked the manager to remind them I need to be able to sit. I go there last week and they originally said I was going into the standing role. I stood up for myself and said no I needed to go where I could sit as I was already mid flare up. After 10 minutes I had to give up that postion which I thought was temporary. Next think I know I’m being told to log on upstairs, which I said would cause me pain but was told I had to. I then had to go up and down the stairs 18 times to serve customers. This absolutely wiped me out. So fast forward to Wednesday where I tell my manager I need to discuss Saturdays and proceed to tell her what happened and that I’m not prepared to do them anymore as my situation isn’t considered. I get told not to be melodramatic and just remind her that next time she needs to call ahead. I told her there won’t be a next time which she told me I have no choice as it is part of a contract which didn’t exist when I started. I told her I’d get a dr note and I’d get occupational health involved and was told I’d still have to go as they’d make sure there was a loophole. Am I being unreasonable refusing to do it as this isn’t the 1st issue and I always end up screwed for 2 weeks after. Thanks in advance xx

7 Replies

No way!!!!

They should make reasonable adjustedments under the disability discrimination act. If u were in a wheelchair they wouldn’t make u do these things! Is there a lift??

You are not being unreasonable and they need to be more helpful. I would go to occ health and I’d get a letter from ur gp to say that reasonable adjustments need to be made in order for u to work

As for being melodramatic 😡😡🤬🤬🤬 how dare they!! They need to live 1 day in our shoes and then see what it’s like and see how well they cope!

I’d get ur contract out and find where it stipulates this as they may just be trying to pull a fast one thinking u won’t check.

Don’t be doing anything u are not happy with and that makes u worse it’s just not worth it. They wouldn’t do it if it was them.

Well done for standing up for yourself it’s very hard to do. I’d definitely get yourself under occ health then they don’t have a leg to stand on!

Good luck and stick with it!


Hello Sara1609

As Sara_A says, you may be able to claim protection under the Equality Act, in which case, your employer must make "reasonable adjustments" to help you cope with your role. The LupusUK employers guide tells you more - take a look at pages 8 and onwards to see what that might mean in practice. lupusuk.org.uk/wp-content/u...

Meantime, speak to your union (I hope you've got one!), who should be able to offer help to you - including attending any meetings you have with your employer, to make sure you don't get unfairly treated or pressurised x


just adding to what good advise you have had so far from Sara & whisperit. I gave my line manager & H.R. a copy of the booklet produced by Lupus UK for this reason, to make employers more aware of our illness & guidance on disability legislation. My employers found this very helpful before discussing what they do to support me & I saw occupational health who also was there to support both myself and give guidance to what my line manager should do to support me... It is difficult, in my job I am expected to do some duties that I was fitter for when I started and they know that the illness has & is still developing. You do need a separate meeting to discuss this & not do when your expected to work with customers... Good luck... ML

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They are breaking the Disability Discrimination Act if they don't make "reasonable adjustments" and it sounds like they are not doing so. If you have a Trade Union, get them onside. The Lupus UK booklet will help, as will the imput of an occupational therapist. If I were in your shoes I'd mention the DDA first. Tends to make them sweat when they understand it, especially if they call a disability "melodramatic". I hope they do accomodate you.


Thank you everyone. It’s nice to know others actually understand what I’m going through. I’m going to talk to my manager again and then arrange a drs note and an occupational health re assessment. Xx


Defo! U have to look out for urself nobody else will!

I’ve just cut my hours down even further part time (from 15 to 12 h a wk!) and feel bit like a failure for it but I need to accept that’s how it’s got to be as my quality of life was suffering and then my families too.

Feel I should be able to work more but it was just making me worse working a full day and a half day. Luckily I do work in the medical profession and my line manager is very good and will stand up for me above and beyond. They literally had to beg me to do something as I was gonna end up going off sick for a few wks otherwise.


Hi Sarahd1609,

I am sorry to hear that you are in this position. Your manager's attitude and behaviour is completely unacceptable. Does your company have an HR department that you could speak to?

It may be worth speaking with Citizens Advice to see whether they can offer any guidance regarding your contract and your legal rights. citizensadvice.org.uk/work/...

We have a couple of booklets about lupus and employment which may also be of interest. You can read/download them at lupusuk.org.uk/working-with... or if you'd like physical copies posted to you, please just send me a private message or email paul@lupusuk.org.uk with your name and address.

Keep us updated with how you get on.


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