Lonely

[Gym1bunny]

I had a brain haemorrhage 2 years ago my life as totally changed lost my job lost friends and suffer with terrible anxiety I'm not the same person I was full of life independent now I have mixing with people talking and going out everyone I'm close to life is moving on and I feel stuck can't see anything in front of me I'm so lonely even with people around me I'm lost and sad I'm getting some help from a phycologist but I'm even struggling with that .when we where in lockdown I felt happy and safe but now things are moving forward I'm panicking about normal life ! What's wrong with me ? I was very lucky to survive my brain bleed ! But sometimes I wish I hadn't

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Hello

So sorry to hear what happened to you and so sorry you are struggling so much now even though it is not surprising you feel the way you do

After going through something like you have it is going to take a while to feel something like any where like you used to , that was a big thing to go through , if you could accept this will take time the pressure will ease and it will come more natural to feel how you used to

I totally get the feeling of you wishing sometimes you had not survived , a different thing but I got double pneumonia they had to fight to keep me going in resuscitation and then I was in intensive care and after it has made my anxiety so bad I get those thoughts it would have been better if I had just gone but we didn't and there must be a reason we are still here even though we cannot see it at the moment

It does not help now the world with this virus feels it has been turned upside down and the fear for so many it is bringing but you are not alone

I am glad you are talking to a psychologist to get the best from it be totally honest , tell them exactly what you have said in your post even the part where you feel it is not helping they should reassure you this is normal and needs time

Nothing is wrong with you except you have been through a traumatic time , a life changing time that needs time to recover from

I am glad you have found these Communities and hope in a small way knowing you are not the only person feeling the way you do will help as well as having somewhere to come and talk and know others may not have had the same experience but they do have the same feelings and thoughts

Take Care x