A question derealization: For many years... - Living with Anxiety

Living with Anxiety

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A question derealization

8 Replies

For many years now, and on what seems to be on a perpetual basis, I have been experiencing DR daily from the time I wake up until the time I sleep. I have social anxiety and ADHD (and probably a lot more abnormalties). I don't experience panic attacks on a daily basis, but I do, rarely. I do not understand what stress is, for I am ignorant when it comes to my sentiments, but I do know most of human interactions I must partake make me feel humiliated and/or insecure, and that is mostly with family, which are the people I feel most comfortable with. Of course, anxiety is involved with that irrational reaction. It seems like a APD symptom, but enough with my ramblings. What I want to ask if it is possible for someone to experience DR on what seems to be a perpetual basis?Every day, every second, reality looks unreal. And I wonder if this constant feeling of DR can make me more and more indifferent? I know anxiety induces DR, but I experience so much anxiety I can't believe I experience THAT MUCH, and it isn't like the anxiety is overwhelming, because it isn't. I hope someone can answer this.

8 Replies
MrMannering profile image
MrMannering

Hi I don't know if I can relate to it ongoing every day, especially these days. However when I first started to suffer from Anxiety, and mine is health related. I remember that for a long time I always felt like I was walking in a dream world. Not only did I feel detached I also didn't care about anything other than how I was feeling. I still get that to this day and in fact today is what I call a bad day somewhat self induced from starting an exercise program yesterday. However I used to say I feel like I float through every day. Whilst I get "bad days" I found that getting involved in something like a hobby or a personal project really helped me to not focus on the issue so much. Of course there are days where said project is put on hold while I'll sit and brace myself for death. Currently they are few and far between for me now.

Do you have something to concentrate on for yourself? I don't mean work or a job but something that you can spend your own time getting involved in. Something where at some point you have said to yourself "I wish I could XYZ"

in reply toMrMannering

I see, how bad is it when you experience DR? Or when you notice it? With mine, it is hard not to notice and, no, I don't have anything I would really like to do. Everything seems like too much work. I rather stay home to play video games, read my books, and talk to people online.

I just want to know if it's normal to experience DR 24/7, literally, and not experience panic attacks all the time. Perhaps I am stressed and don't know that, and my constant anxiety adds on to it, thus leading to a constant DR. Thank you for your answer, Mr. Mannering.

MrMannering profile image
MrMannering in reply to

OK are you saying you don't realise your DR?

When I had it bad the only way I could describe it was that if I turned my head fast my eyes would take a little longer to catch up. In amongst the strange floaty feeling. Do you leave the house to work? Reason I ask was that I would work at a desk staring at my PC then come home and stare at a PC or TV then on the weekend I would have these plans but end up doing none of them and stare at a TV or PC then back to work at a desk on Monday to repeat process. I found that it develops a form of cabin fever despite I was leaving the house to go to work didn't seem to count. Of course cabin fever can make DR appear or worse if you have it. My wife would always walk the dog everyday and when I was working at home and available I started to go with her. Fresh air, different scenery and no pressure did it the world of good. If you don't have a dog drop some headphones on and go for a walk. Sounds terribly boring I know but it may help.

in reply toMrMannering

No, I notice it. I notice it too often, if anything. Yes, I go to work, and at work I end up dissociating myself to the point of being unable to talk, unless I make an effort. I used to go for walks every single day, I even changed the routes countless times, that didn't help me in the slightest. My derealization is not induced by staring at a monitor the majority of the time. It's just there. Lingering about... stalking me.

in reply toMrMannering

I can relate to how you didn't care about anything besides what it is you're feeling. It sucks.

Dexter1 profile image
Dexter1

You should see a psychiatrist regarding this.

in reply toDexter1

I suppose you are right. Thanks, I guess.

mdburg profile image
mdburg

I can totally relate to the derealization that you are experiencing. It's terrible, isn't it? It seems like I have it all the time every day. I just feel weird like, who am I anymore. I wake up feeling out-of-body or this-isnt-me. It's almost like my spirit self and my physical self are disconnected. My thoughts race and i have a terrible time getting to sleep. I have social anxiety too, i feel dizzy and not-all-there, like i could pass out at any moment, sometimes wondering if others can even see me, its really bizarre. But I know I can't just stay home all the time and hide in my house, I want to be my old self again.  I try to have hobbies and look forward to things, maybe I am extremely lonely or afraid of the future (being alone), or maybe it's a physical problem (not enough vitamins or something). I recently quit drinking alcohol thinking maybe that's why I get anxiety and derealization so bad. Its too early to tell yet, its only been 5 days. I am trying to eat really healthy. Maybe I need more exercise, maybe I need some friends. I dont know what i need, i guess. I have an alcoholic husband, and two teenage daughters from my ex who is an alcoholic as well. My 5 year old son with my current husband is really all I've got on a day to day basis. We never get to go anywhere exciting as a family, we pretty much hang out at our local brewery, fun life huh? Maybe that's why I have anxiety and derealization, because my life is so different than it used to be. I feel stuck. I'm trying to find a common denominator with any one else who can relate, maybe the cell phone/I pad is bad for my eyes and that's what makes me dizzy or foggy head. I don't know. Anyway you're not alone and it's comforting to know others feel this way too. I just wish we could figure out why it's happening. 

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