Staying inside to avoid triggers in public

[88cev88]

I’m triggered by a certain type of jewelry and when I’m in public I never know when I will see someone wearing it. So I often avoid leaving the house. How do I get past this? My therapist is refusing to do exposure therapy because she says I’m not stable enough. I agree I’m not stable, but I don’t know how to cope with going out in the meantime.

[Nathalie99 Partner]

Hi 88cev88,

Thank you for sharing about your situation.

I was unable to go outside due to severe ptsd and had exposure therapy because that was the only one on offer so I took it. It was a mixed experience.

It is so sad that most people needing therapy are not in a stable place - otherwise they wouldn't need therapy.

For me, personally, I had to try to reduce pressure on going out otherwise the stress was too much. I would tell myself I don't have to go out if it's too much. I would go out on days when I was feeling a bit stronger and start only a few metres first, then out of the building then around the building and back etc.

Shopping was almost the worst scenario so it took longer to be able to do that.

I needed a trauma therapy which wasn't going to retraumatize me worse.

[SavingGrace Administrator]

Hi 88cev88,

Jewellery connects me to my PTSD also (and no doubt, in a slightly different way)... but I don't have the answer, yet I wanted to share this with you: that you're not alone in the feeling that this connection with an object creates.

As a young child I was known for adorning myself with play jewellery. Now, I barely touch it.

I can empathise that there is a suitable time to expose and deal with the emotions. I also agree with Nathalie, that life calls on us to meet daily issues and demands.

Thankfully, there are some answers for those worse-case scenario days: such as getting a food delivery ordered to our doorstep, if we are lucky?! I have four grocery shops I rotate on going to... don't ask me why, but I do so..... i guess it alleviates any sense of potential triggering in relation to my PTSD.... so i just go with my flow.

I also have used another analogy before, which I'd like to share here: using green spaces as stepping stones. First wilder, rural places, then more public spaces - open air.... and then, gradually moving myself closer towards spaces or areas where I would feel threatened or suffocated in previous occasions.

So, yes, like Nathalie suggests: tentative steps forward doing only what we can or wish to accomplish. Making no demands on ourselves - and always offering a back-out plan.

It can feel odd, making such boundaries - and yet, it is just doing what is safe and logical at the end of the day, because PTSD can play irrationally on our senses...

I would suggest trying wearing a wide brimmed hat, or darkened sunglasses - something that can protect the 3rd eye from those immediate & sudden impacts caused due to visual glances/cues. When I want or need to hide, yet need to be in public, I use such accessories....