Nightmares, Flashbacks and Suicidality

[becominghuman]

I have been struggling with nightmares. Daily flashbacks and suicidal thoughts and urges since May 2020. The cause was workplace exploitation and mobbing.

I was hospitalised for suicidal thoughts and urges in early June. After my discharge, I was given medication, the indication to seek regular treatment, move in with a relative, find a new job, and create a stress management plan as well as work on a daily stress management activities. I was also advised to work on MBSR and coping mechanisms for stress management.

I’m having trouble completing all these for the following reasons -

- Family opposition

- Low energy throughout the day.

I need some help here to complete my post-treatment activities from you all. Please give me motivation and support.

[TheBooG]

Stress management activities I have been doing push-ups and other exercises.

I also write or speak into my journal when I’m having thoughts that are not making me feel good.

I try to reach out to people and tell them why I’m grateful for them in my life.

I’m the same way with low energy and I still try to do those things, it helps a little.

[becominghuman in reply to TheBooG]

These sound like useful strategies. I’ve done speaking journals before. Same goes with the people in my life. Good on you for trying to use these! 🌈

[ScubaD]

That sounds like a lot to handle in one go!! Take your time, choose what is important to you and keeps you safe. Believe in your ability to get through one day at a time. PTSD is with you but do not let it define you. Take good care of your self, take rest when you need to, those who think they know what you should do or be but have no experience of ptsd can be listened to but follow your instincts and do what is in Your best interest. You are recovering, it takes time and patience from others and from You. Take care, a fellow human being.

[becominghuman in reply to ScubaD]

Thanks, that helps me rethink it a bit. My sense of self is definitely a little damaged because of the symptoms I’ve been dealing with. Now, I want to be able to work on self care as well.

[greenrainbow]

Sounds like difficult situation. Do you have a psychologist already? I’d start with finding a good one and making sure you two have a connection. Also, try to spoil yourself. Sending you a virtual hug!

[becominghuman in reply to greenrainbow]

Thanks Green! 🌈 I’ve been looking for one but my family has been opposing it. How would you suggest I spoil myself?

[greenrainbow in reply to becominghuman]

Honestly you should try despite yourself family. If you had some virus who would stop you from going to the doctor? It’s the same thing with mental illnesses which are equally bad and deadly. As for spoiling yourself: eat your favorite food, watch a movie, read a book, go shopping, go for sports or a walk... I try to do at least three things like this a day. I ended up with a huge collection of new clothes and other things in addition to a full fridge but I feel way better. In this way I am trying to create this mindset of putting myself first and enjoying my time instead of feeling miserable.

[becominghuman in reply to greenrainbow]

Thanks, Green Rainbow, for your support ❤️

[Beingindependent Volunteer]

Well it’s really hard to go through what you’re going through but just know that many of us feel the same way

but I do is I look at the clock and I tell myself OK I’m gonna get up in two minutes and I make myself get up

and then once I get up then I eat breakfast then I look at my phone and look at the sites and I email my friends every day because not only does it help her but it also helps me just kind of get out how I’m feeling

and then I’m not really in the mood but I know that I need to go for a walk so makes me feel better when I do that and I can always work in the garden pull weeds and then I make myself a really short list the night before and things I’m going to do and I’m also looking for a job too

I applied for a job and I got a reject letter when I realize I’ve never gotten one as before cause I’m usually always gotten a job that I applied for

so things take time so you know to realize what you’ve come through in your life you know to be proud of yourself that’s really important

and every day is a new day and you just i’m sorry that your family causes a lot of problems I personally very much separated from them because really can’t change people and that’s very frustrating and you just really have to be the best person you can be and you can’t expect really anything from them

they’re supposed to love you and if they don’t show that love well just realize that you’re in the right and you have to just live your life and enjoy it and you know your life doesn’t depend on what they think of you

you just have to choose what’s best for you and that’s really what life is about

so I hope that you find your encouragement

I like to listen to a song that makes me want to dance or just is very uplifting and positive

sometimes I watch a video online that’s a motivational video give me some pep in my step

I just kind of see different things as sort of a launching pad to get me from one place to the other like I have calendars that say something very motivational and so I do that

I make a very short list of things that I can accomplish and it’s really about taking little steps here in there and just know that you really are amazing as you are

and that you can do anything and that when you look for a job you’re not only applying for a job that the people like you but you also want to find a place where you want to work or you’ll enjoy working there

so they’re interviewing you but you’re also interviewing them

so I hope that you have a really good day and you find what makes you happy and know that everyone struggles and everything is difficult sometimes but you just try to find out what works in the day

take care

[becominghuman in reply to Beingindependent]

Thank you, Being Independent for your insight. ❤️