Just been to Farmers Market
Meant to ask for apple crumble my brain came out with something mumbled
I apologised explained I was not feeling too well
Soon be a recluse because I hardly speak to anyone in case wrong thing comes out
Its OK cognitive therapist telling me to take a deep breath and think before I speak doesn't work
I used to have a guy come into my florists shop for flowers for his wife, he'd had a stroke that affected his speech, we got by with a lot of sign language on his part and laughter too, even though it was frustrating for him. He couldn't say or remember his wife's name so he'd bring that on a piece of paper, he kept it in his wallet all the time, try writing things down and using that as reminders.
I can't manage without copious lists for everything, but I don't beat myself up about it it's the way it is now, don't be hard on yourself xxxxx Janet
Yes I know that feeling, it's hard to go out there an just chat. But that is th best cure.go chat about everything an nothing. It gets a little easier bu I still need my written reminders. It's all well and good of getting over feeling like a complete mumpty every time you open our mouth, but hen the reason of bein able to chat is important.
Don't give up trying!
My hubby used to get frustrated when he could not bring to mind the word for something - so I got him to describe it to me instead which seems to work when the deep breath and thinking doesn't bring the word to mind. I accept this takes more confidence when you are out and it is people that you don't know. Have you tried just saying I am sorry I have had a brain injury and sometimes I cannot find the word I need.........then describe it or wait until the word comes.
You might find that people are more tolerant than you think and if you just tell them up front what the problem is they will try to help. If you have regular shops that you go to that helps even more as they can get to know you and will give you time and if you want it help.
Try not to be too afraid of making mistakes - easier said than done I know
x
Do you have one of the Headway Brain Injury Survivor cards? I keep one with me at all times so if I get all confuddled I can show it...if I actually remember I have it of course.
I often gets my words mixed up or say nonsense words...sometimes I have no idea I have done it and sometimes the look on the other person's face gives it away. If I'm lucky the word I used is close enough for them to know what I mean, if its not then that is tough because I will have forgotten what I was trying to say anyway so I just laugh it off. It took me a while to get to the stage where I can do that and to be honest I have no idea how it came about but I'm guessing I realised there was little point in wasting precious brain power getting upset about something I could do nothing about...Of course the memory issues help a lot with that because minutes after it happens I will have forgotten it anyway.
A little humour goes a long way and if you can find a way to laugh it off (even though it does not feel ion the least bit funny when it happens) you will find others will laugh WITH you (not at you)
I don't have the visual images to be able to describe the thing I wanted to say so trying to picture it does not work for me, but I have heard many people say it is a helpful strategy.
I know the immediate reaction is to avoid the situations where this might happen but in fact the more you confront them the easier it gets over time. hang in there...
How do you get one
If you just send a private message to Headwayuk asking for one they'll post it to you. 
Hi cat3 how do I send a private message to headway to ask for one of those cards . Sorry for being a bit thick xx
Hi muzzy. Just click on the envelope at top of the page and then on 'new conversation'. In the box which appears, type in headwayuk and then ask for the card in the main text area. Then click on 'Send'.
Cat xx
Or, as Spartan suggests, you could phone them free on 0808 800 2244 (9am-5pm mon-fri) x
You cannot give up just because things come out wrong. This is why the new you will soon emerge, having re learnt how to communicate again. The Headway card is a good idea. In the meantime, relax, everything will sort itself out in time.
I NEARLY ALWAYS START CONVERSATIONS IN BAN
ABOVE REPLY SENT ITSELF BEFORE I'D FINISHED IT, CAME UP WITH AN ERROR MESSAGE THEN SENT IT. IT WASN'T ME THIS TIME.
ANYWAY, I USUALLY START CONVERSATIONS IN BANKS & OTHER IMPORTANT PLACES WITH I'VE GOT A BRAIN INJURY PLEASE BEAR WITH ME. THEY EITHER RECOIL IN HORROR OR ARE JUST UNDERSTANDING. EITHER WAY THEY USUALLY HELP ME MORE & MAKE SURE I UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M DOING.
I HAVE NO EMBARRASSMENT WITH TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT MY BRAIN INJURY I'D BE MORE EMBARRASSED TO HAVE THEM THINK I'M A BLITHERING IDIOT. IF THEY'RE BEING RUDE OR MEAN IT SOON SHUTS THEM UP.
DEFINITELY A GOOD IDEA.
I agree absolutely Zeblet. I recently took my laptop into John Lewis with a fault and couldn't grasp, quickly enough, their techno-talk. So I said "Please bear with me, I'm reasonably intelligent but, since a brain haemorrhage, it just takes me a little longer to process information".
They treated me with patience and respect and wrote everything down so I could refer to it should my memory fail me later.
And their attitude changed from 'Oh God not another dumbo' to 'Wow, haven't you done well ?"
Cat, that is a brilliant phrase! Maybe Headway could offer that on a card too? So nice to hear about the level of customer service as well.
I often find that when my other half mixes up her words I know exactly what she really means anyway. The trouble is that in public, other people then think we are from another planet... which can be a great source of amusement to us afterwards..
For anyone who has not seen one, the brain injury survivor card is plastic like a credit card and it says...(laid out as below in blue on white background)
"I AM A SURVIVOR OF
A BRAIN INJURY
I may have problems with
my memory, speech
or actions.
Your help and patience
would be appreciated"
and on the back It has the Headway logo, Headway details and space for you to add your name and address and phone number. I used that space to put my name and added "In emergency call ..."my husbands name and phone number
I got my card from my local Headway group
Thanks
Hi, I am the same and when I got my Headway card it meant I no longer fled places in tears when the words wouldn't come out. Used lots. Everyone should b given one when they leave hospital. K
Oh blimey, yes I was out with B few weeks ago and we asked for coffee in a cafe. It was a fancy shop with a whole range of different coffees. B had already had one and so when she approached the counter she asked for the coffee "with the dental thing". The waitress looked confused but then tried to be really helpful, she was patient and gentle. Interesting to note your comment about not having visual images iforget, I hadn't considered that before in relation to B.
Thanks again its nice to know I am not alone I normally feel stupid when I come out with something I would not have said in a million years
I am looking forward to getting a Headway Card
Done it again part 3
Ooops I did it again
I DONE IT 💪
It happened again
