bladder removal

[angie26]

my husband has had his bladder and prostrate removed, his op was nearly 5 weeks ago. He was a walker and golfer and always outdoors, today he is a shadow of his former self. lost so much weight, not eating well as everything he says tastes like cardboard, I’m getting increasingly concerned about his mental state and his ability to cope with his now state of dealing with his stoma, he’s an intelligent man but I don’t think he imagined the time involved to get himself ready for the day and spends a lot of time still in bed. Any help appreciated

[Jimpa]

Your husband sounds a whole lot like me eight years ago. My story: bladder cancer diagnosed in March of 2016. Tumor removed, followed by six rounds of chemotherapy which my body didn’t handle well. Bladder and prostate removed in August of 2016. This was followed by two years of immunotherapy treatment (35 sessions of Keytruda) which worked great for me. I have been cancer free for six years now. My first six months after surgery were difficult. I also lost a lot of weight and most things did not taste good. What my wife and I realized was when I discovered a few things I could eat, I eat a whole bunch of that. For me it was BLTs and hotdogs. Existed on that until my appetite improved. Don’t worry about eating the same stuff all the time. The important thing is too eat! Also like your husband, I had difficulty adjusting to my stoma. Took me quite a while to find the right pouching system. For me, the company was ConvaTec. Once I found the correct pouching, things got a whole lot better. I change my pouches twice a week and haven’t had any problems for five years. I play golf twice a week all year around (we live in Las Vegas) and walk a lot. I am 78 years old. I think I was suffering some depression for the first six months but things gradually got much better. Tell your husband to hang in there. Things will get better. If there’s anything I can do to help, don’t hesitate to ask. My name is Jim.

[angie26 in reply to Jimpa]

Thank you for your reply it sounds like my husband is going through a similar post op experience like yourself. He’s so depressed, I can’t raise him from bed very early, sleeping is a problem and sleeping pills don’t seem to make a difference. I have been trying everything to get him to eat but nothing tastes like food to him! the only thing he eats well is sweets but he’s diabetic. My husband and I had a trip to Las Vegas a present from my son who lives in San Francisco lovely memories, sadly living in the UK we don’t get the lovely weather that you do.

[Allyp69]

So sorry to read this..not sure how old your husband is but a big op will take time to recover from. Is there a group of similar people who can encourage and advise your husband? My husband has had bladder and prostate cancer and is 80 now. Go back to consultant and ask for support?

[angie26 in reply to Allyp69]

My husband is 77 he has fortnightly visits to stoma nurse which is 40 miles away, he has a redness around his stoma which they say is an allergy to the bag, he’s on his 5th bag now, the nurses say it’s improving now. He’s told he must get up and get out in the fresh air and walk but he just can’t find the will to do it. I’m his only carer and I’m on oxygen , I have osteoporosis with painful fractures and a heart condition so I do as much as I can but it’s not easy especially when he has no get up and go!