Fresh start - fresh f**k up

I'm sorry for swearing but I'm actually too p***ed off at the moment to try and reword everything. Me and the hubby just moved from nr London to Aberdeen Scotland. The flat is lovely and I like it. The landlord however didn't order the furniture until late so we've nowhere to put anything. So we are living out of boxes.

On top of that, we had savings for this and granted we were over indulgent on restaurants - expensive sheets - fresh fruit and veg. I checked my balance online and saw I had 200 more than I thought I should have... So I spent it. Only to then discover - my DLA had come in early. That 200 is supposed to be toward the rent. Matt (hubby) has sorted it but means we have no cash for the next 3 weeks until he gets paid. I am so stressed and keep beating myself up over it. I'm so stupid - I new that money wasn't mine - if you get me.

Now the straw that broke the camels back. I forgot to take my freaking epilium last night - my mood stabiliser - and as sure the sun rising in the morning - I've been really low all day. Brilliant. Any tips to help dig myself out?

Yours gratefully

Fibrof****d :-P

[ EDITED BY ADMIN - swear words asterisked out ]

17 Replies

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  • Three suggestions for your dilema

    Is there anything you have bought that you haven't unpacked and can take back for a refund?

    Find out if there is a food bank in the city - you can go there if you get desperate.

    Can you borrow off a credit card, a relative or a friend?

    Good luck on the move - I adore Scotland, I'm sure you'll love living in Aberdeen.

    Julie xx

  • I don't think we should be suggesting borrowing off a credit card, this will lead to more problems and isn't going to help the situation at all. Any form of borrowing needs paying back and the interest the financial concerns charge on credit cards would escalate the problem.

    Please don't borrow from a credit card Sam, preferably don't borrow at all. This won't straighten the problems out. Please take care.

  • As your landlord didn't supply the furniture,can't you pay slightly less rent? It might be enough for a meal?

  • Hi

    Yes take anything back that is packed that you really don't need.

    I am not sure if the credit card is a good idea as you will just end up in more debt.

    I am sure you can make some really delicious meals out of very little I know we do.

    Speak the bank and see if they will give you a little overdraft, say £100. Enough to get by and explain your dilemma to the landlord if he is approachable as after all you probably bought more stuff due to him not ordering furniture in time.

    Do you have relatives who would have you over for a meal?

    Don't fret too much you will be surprised how you do cope and how quickly those 3 weeks pass.

    Try and keep up beat and think of it as an adventure and not a disaster.

    Big Piggie hugs xxxxx

  • hi I understand how you are feeling and I hope you can get something sorted sorry I cannot be more help take care love beth x

  • Hi fibrosam are you not able to return some of the extra items that you bought? (if you still have the receipts) Do you not have some relatives you could borrow a small amount from? Or as Pinkypig says maybe ask the bank for a small overdraft (i am sure that as you have just moved they will understand that you need extra money at this time). Don't get yourself upset about it because it will only make your FM worse -- just accept that we all make mistakes at times (especially with the fibrofog!) and "move on". Anyway welcome to Aberdeen (I moved up here 6 years ago -- I am 16 miles outside Aberdeen) The people are very friendly which has helped me as my nearest relatives are 360 miles away. The only downside is the cold weather in winter (not much warm weather in the summer either!) There is also a FM Support group in Aberdeen if you are interested in joining. The city itself is quite small and not too overpowering (I certainly wouldn't be able to cope with London). If you want any help with "things in Aberdeen" just message me on here and I will try and help. Good luck in your new home :) xx

  • The replies on this page just goes to prove that none of us are alone, we can get support from each other and even though we have never met we all know there is someone who will listen when we need it. Even if you don't take the advise offered you know that you have friends who understand.

    soft gentle hugs and butterfly kisses

    xx

  • Bless you! Don't tell yourself off or be annoyed with you. You need to be your own best friend at this time. Try and relax your mind if you can, know it's not easy, then follow through with the helpful comments on this site. Feel you will get through, keep going and do your best to sort it out. You can do it. Love and light to you.

    Karen x

  • At least you've got a realy understanding partner,iv checked my bank account this morn and I'm £300 pound short in wages,I daren't even tell my partner!we haven't got on for a few weeks which Is getting me down,wish I could speak to him,gonna go into work in min see what's happened!xx

  • Hi. Ive become obsessed with checking my bank account over the last few years becoz Ive been screwed over by DWP too many times and landed myself in deep poop because of their mistakes/ neglect, or they dont tell you vital info, which results in overpayment (which Ive spent). So now if theres anything unaccounted for....CHECK IT OUT before the spending spree,lol. Hope you get on ok.xx

  • i don't know about that word you used to describe your dilemma,a little bit immature and reckless i thought,but in saying that perhaps a good samaritan may feel sorry for you and send some cash.GOOD LUCK!.

  • Hey guys first im not being trite But this too will pass and thats how i live my life now .I know what its like to have no money but its surprising what you can do without .A WARNING keep checking bank accounts becaus ehub had money taken from WONGA two ammounts and we have never had anything to do with them ,looking on internet there are many such accounts of people being done xx

  • We all make mistakes especially checking bank statements i look and think we have money then everything comes out all together. It's life just make the best use of any money you have and shop for the cheapest bargains you can. I buy porridge oats in a big bag and a big bag of pasta to bulk out food. Hope you settle in your new flat soon and enjoy living in Aberdeen. x

  • Do you have a penny jar...we usually have quite a large ammount in ours once we sit counting it and there was over £150 in there last time we cashed up... Even if you only scrape £50 together that would see you through if you were really careful and bought budget. Also as suggested is there anything you can return for a refund....Failing that introduce yourselves to all the neighbours in the hope they will invite you for supper....

  • I have also been there without money. It is difficult, but gets easier.

    Baked beans and cheese on toast is one of the most nutritious and cheapest meals.

    Chicken and peas mixed with rice and a little sweetcorn relish is also cheap and tasty.

    Fresh fruit and veg is still available cheap if you find a grocer who has a few near-gone items which he could give you a bag of cheaply if you ask.

    These are all things I did when I was skint. Suprisingly I was at my fittest then as no luxuries, and had to walk everywhere (tho not a good option with fibro if too much of a distance however).

    Good luck - oh, and please don't forget to take your tablets - that should be a priority in the next few weeks when you need them most :-) Hugs

    Glenys

  • As Glenys so rightly says Sam, it is possible to cut many corners and save money. I was a single mum for a few years with three children, we lived on baked beans on toast, sometimes with cheese on top, sometimes with a poached egg on top. The children were healthy, seldom got the usual coughs and colds at school and I was well too. I bought oranges, apples, bananas and veg from the local market at low prices. We also had a jacket potato with tinned tuna, also onion on top. All healthy suggestions full of nourishment and nutrition and it doesn't cost much for all these things. I bought porridge oats for our breakfast, really cheap for a huge bag, made up with half milk and water = quick microwaved healthy breakfast.

    Put a little money aside when you can manage it for incoming bills too, this avoids things piling up. I bought stamps for bills when I could afford it and paid utilities through payment books a bit at a time. (I rang the council, gas, electric and water companies and explained my situation). It takes more effort to plan everything, but you could save money managing things like this for a while until you were straightened out a bit.

    Pasta is another wonderful food which adds bulk and nutrition at the same time. You can add anything to it, leftovers, tuna, cold meat, any veg, chicken or any other meat you may have. Minced beef is great with pasta or spaghetti.

    Hope some of these ideas help you Sam. I am sure other members will post more ideas for you to help. Take care and I hope things look up for you very soon. Take care.

  • Hoping things are a little mor possitive for you this week and that you have managed to claw back some cash to get you through x

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