As much as it hurts, I have my first appointment with a psychologist tomorrow. It upsets me so much that I am being sent there. It feels as though nobody believes I am hurting. I have no idea what my appointment will entail. I have attended many first appointments before, but I have never returned. I REALLY dislike talking and I have anxiety going out alone.
With a Psychologist, a Physiotherapist and Anti-depressants, I should be relieved to have help, but I just want a magic wand to make it go away. I really don't want to be digging through my past with a stranger. I just want... my life back.
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gemarella
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i agree with you !! as i was sent to one ..was put as you will see the 'best' brain specialist for the state you have got in ! so i went and had 2 sessions and still could not get my head around it all then i fell unwell inbetween as he said i should think about more sessions..
I went back to Dr's yesterday and they have told me that i really need to go back to help me cope as there is no magic to help and i have to try and ... cannot think of a word hahah so i have agreed to go back !
so i think that gemarella should atleast we can compare notes hehe how the sessions are going .. i think i do need help and as they said i definately do not need physicatrica treatment (nothing wrong with that either ) but it is because i am trying to run my work and staff and i keep being knocked down with physical pain and weakness and just cannot deal with it at all much now. its as if i have to sit on my bum all the time because i struggle to stand long enough
but i love your reply i have to say and it has put me at ease too THANKYOU xxxxxxxx
Bless you. I have come to know your situation over the past months.
I can understand your sadness as you have to make changes and have no option about some of those changes. You also have a unique opportunity/challenge in trying to make your business work for you as you take a lesser active role.
I had the struggle in having to give up my job. Being single and independent it was so difficult. I wanted psychological support but my doctor refused as he thought I understood my situation and had little to gain. I wish that I could have convinced him otherwise. By the time I stopped fighting my employers and let them sack me I had been having small strokes from the stress.
Now 7 years on and I have moved to an adapted property. Use an electric wheelchair and with direct payments assistance I employ an assistant for 24 hours a week. Not the life I planned, but a life worth living and full of all these new understanding friends. My fibro family!
Just last month sold my old house and now I am looking for a business that I can invest in so I will not end up back on benefits in a few years time!
Wishing you the best joy in your challenges. Fi xx
Hi gemerella - don't feel bad about being referred to a psychologist. Having the opportunity to see a psychologist with really help you. It doesn't mean they don't believe you at aIl. The challenge of living with a long term illness is as much an emotional trauma as a physical one - more so in many cases. I completely empathise with the desire to have your life back - I feel the same. But having some support from a private counsellor in CBT to help me manage my physical and emotional pain that FMS devastated my life with, I spoke to the Consultant Psychologist to get some more specialist and longer term help. Some areas of the NHS take FMS seriously - unfortunately my PCT do not - and you cannot get specialist psychological support in my county.
My experience of psychological support is that you are guided through the emotions that you feel able to share. The more you share, the more they can help. They really are not about trawling through your childhood etc. It is about the here and now. Your current circumstances and how can you accept living with the long term illness. It is a great thing that they have recognised and offered you support in this way. Your last 2 sentences, express a real strong emotion that they can help you with. There are so many people on here that will have shared your feelings at some point - it is a part of the grieving process. You are (as I am too) grieving for the life you no longer have - the life that FMS has taken away from you. I have found the guidance and support of real help in processing my emotions. (have a look at my recent blogs) It was a difficult thing to do - but now I have 'put it out there' I can deal better with my emotions because I am aware of them. The main thing I was relieved about the counsellor and psychologist were that they knew and understood how difficult FMS is to live with. They were familiar with it and knew that there are multiple hurdles and they are never ending. It is just that they can help you, help yourself to get over those hurdles. Good Luck.
Dont feel bad it can help. I am doing it along with meds n phis. No magic wand will make it go but you can help just accept the help. I have now realised i am going throigh a grieving process for my old life/body and know i have to accept to move forward.
Its hard but you can work with it and get best results. Xxxx
I wish you luck I have been seen by a councillor years ago.... As much use as a chocolate teapot... Then a year ago when were in the process of moving home putting my mother in a home I had a small breakdown and was referred to a mental health nurse ... Who just said once you have moved you will feel fine...... Yes to degree she was right less stress ... But my neighbour said the same thing ... And I didn't have to travel to get the same advice but was never given any positive coping strategies when I feel I am spiralling out of control.... No contact number just given a cheery smile which is hard to return when you are leaving the place in tears with guilt and pain.. Enough of my negativity
Good luck and if you get any good hints and tips for coping please let us know
Hugs VG x
hey hun its really to look after yre needs and as above have said to make sure you adapt to this new person and its not coz they dont believe you.
also there is no shame in it you no.you hold yre head up high okay x
I CAN completely sympathise with your circumstance,I too have been referred for the 3rd time to psychologists,I also have bad feelings about trawling through my past,and get anxious and panicky about being out on my own. Please persevere though,if not for yourself then for others,to show them that people can move forward. It could also help your coping with FM.
At one stage or other most of us have to go through this at the end of the day it is also to try and get you to get a positive thinking hmmmm. Please do not worry too much. Remember the ilnness itself also makes us feel guilty as we feel others do not understand.
I do hope you get a pleasant surprise, I know how you feel. I used to be able to happily communicate with professionals and showed eagerness to get to the bottom of the issues that were causing my illness. Now I am tired and quiet.
Sometimes someone comes up with a gem of an idea or thought to make the pain more bearable, so its worth a try.
I agree strongly with the answers you have received it will help lots more than you think go with it I received psychologists help for 12mnths
Hi gemma I was horrified when I was sent for this sort of help at the beginning. After all its physical pain I deal with daily. How could it possibly help to talk about it ! I found understanding the process of physical AND emotional pain really helpful. One of the major processes affected ny this illness is our stress response which does translate onto physical pain. I can feel my neck and shoulders tense....my shoulders rise up... And then they spasm.
Diet also plays a huge part in this and finding out what toxins are affecting your body....AND starting to detox is also a major part of this. Pills are added toxins, magic ones or not lol. Acceptance is key. Psychology can really help with that xxx good luck with it x
Hi I dont write on these blogs often but get a great deal of comfort by reading them, i am very lucky to have a job as a receptionist just 8 hours a week,i work for a team of psychologists , and if it wasn't for them i would still not be diagnosed with fibro as they are so aware of this horrid condition they pressed me to see gp and then a rheumatologist as i was always in pain and feeling awful.as soon as i was diagnosed they offered me so much support and if i have one of my bad days they swap a day when i am better, we now have a psychologist who specialises in helping people with acute pain and fms sufferers and there are a lot of people like us who come to see her for a period of time to help them come to terms with there illness.So please do not get too anxous or worried about going to see a psychologist you maybe very suprised at how much support you are given and that they are fully upto date with fms. and care about your well being. so good luck today, i will be thinking of you.
I so wish I had read this earlier. I went to sleep upset, woke up and decided not to go. Reading your comments makes me feel so relieved and I understand now how she could help me. I'll try ringing her again later to rearrange an appointment. Thank you all so much.
Dear Gemarella,They will totally understand why you cancelled and will be only to happy to see you another day. after you have seen her you will probably feel as if a weight has been lifted from your shoulders and you can deal with your fms differently. good luck
Hi there as allll have said above it is to Help you deal with this and all your going through!
I said exactly the same things and thought the same as if not believed!
I saw the Neurologist who refered me to a brain specialust( clinical neurophyscologist) because of the state i had got into and not been noticed a long time ago through alll that has happend in my life time, its not to dig up the past but to help the present and future.
I still need to sort the rest of my sessions as i had 2 and not gone back as i was told to think about having them, i thought in my head fine your there to support but your not going to cure me!! Been so busy with wrk and training girls to do the job i love dearly that belongs to me as wrk for myself, so was heart breaking to start getting frustrated.
We all cope or learn to cope and deal with things in different ways.
That happened to me when I was first diagnosed and it was even said by a nurse it was all in my head well at that I went on a moan up explaining I used to love my job that I can't now do and love walks ect and even doubted myself but I went and it did help its helps you as the others say you have a different body and with that it takes time to adapt if any help on may the 5 th 2009 there was a debate in parliment over fibromyalgia but also recognised that it now is a serious condition hang in there sweetheart you won't feel this way forever just give yourself timexxx
presumably you will have had your psychology by now, hope it went well. If you get a good therapist it can really help & no, it doesn't mean you are going mad!
In August my GP (obviously fed up listening to me moaning) decided that i may also have CFS and should see a psycotherapist or psycologist cant remember which. Anyway was at the Drs 2 weeks ago and saw the other GP in the practise who told me there was no funding for this ????. So i cant give any advice on your appt. but dont not go because you are worried about it. Maybe consider yourself lucky to have the chance and come back and share any advice you have been given. I have also never been sent to a Fibro Dr or clinic. Am i missing out?
I hate talking, too - I'm great in writing, but rubbish in person. But CBT was pretty good for me, because you weren't forced to talk a lot; it's more about thinking. Hope today goes/has gone well! xx
As a psychologist I want to calm your fears. Your feelings are completely normal and it will help both you and the doctor if you are completely honest and tell her that being referred to her represents defeat. If she's like me, she's met hundreds of angry patients who didn't want to see her and thought the purpose of the appointment was for her to convince you that you needed 5 years of therapy to resolve some deep seated anger issues that were causing your FMG Your doctor will have a better understanding of how to help you if you are upfront about what your expectations are, what you do and don't feel comfortable with and what treatment you have already had.
Best practice in treatment of fibromyalgia recognizes the need to treat pain per the patient's report as to where the pain is located, the type of pain experienced, duration, time of day and intensity. Research shows that healthcare providers underestimate patients' experience of pain and that the most accurate measure of pain is a patient's report. Psychologists who specialize in pain management do not believe the pain is imaginary, or "all in the patient's mind." They are trained in adjuvant techniques to provide pain management apart from medications.
Perhaps the psychologist will be able to recommend other medical professionals who are more knowledgeable in treating your problem.
I have also visited physicians who were unable to find the cause of my symptoms. There is always the suggestion that if labs and scans fail to produce an answer; the problem is one of psychogenic origin. In my case, as a person who had never once smoked; no one had thought to look at my lungs. Years later, when a CT scan was done, it was found that I was one of the 8-10% of patients to have lung cancer who had no history of tobacco or marijuana use. Don't write off any type of clinician just because you haven't had experience with what they do. You might be pleasantly surprised by the ways you'll feel better. One note of caution; all psychologists are not the same (as with individuals in all professions). We all have different specializations and, of course, different personalitites. If the person you've been referred to isn't experienced in helping people with your history; be sure to ask her (or him) to refer you to someone who is. I hope this has helped or will help someone else who has been sent to see a psychologist and is apprehensive about what is going to happen. We are here to help you feel better. You can always call us before your appointment to talk for a few minutes. Lots of patients want to touch base-- just hear what our voices sound like. If your doctor didn't refer you; you probably would have wanted to speak to me about your problem and ask how I could help you before committing to an appointment. Please call and tell the receptionist that you're a new patient and would like to talk to the doctor for a minute or two when she's available before your appointment. That way you'll feel like you've already connected.
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