Witch doctors.....what doctors....ATOS doctors.....

[Ozzygirl64]

Witch Doctors...what doctors.....ATOS doctors

Oh where for art thou doctors

Please tell us where you are

Can you really see me

Climbing out the car

I just love your x-ray vision

It really serves you well

You see through concrete walls

Your reports they show it well

You claimed 40 minutes sitting

You claim 2 minutes I was standing

You claim you saw me for 63 minutes

I think your maths needs expanding

How did you make the grade

When you can't do simple sums

But does it really matter

When our decision time it comes

You said I looked respectable

I felt more like a tramp

You said I used the stairs well

Sorry mate, I used the ramp

You asked me did I have a dog

And did I take him out for walks

You could have asked my dog this one

I swear to god it talks

You have very little knowledge

Of what our illness means

We're not supposed to button

So sorry folks, no jeans

You think we should be hermits

A home visit would be nice

But no we have to travel

Then you make us pay the price

You travelled here alone by bus

That journeys ninety minutes long

You claim I had an easy trip

I am sorry but you are wrong

You see dear ATOS doctor

We find it hard to just sit still

We are all stuck with this illness

Kind of like a bitter pill

Something like a lung disease

You claim you cannot hear

Let me tell you this my friend

It fills my heart with fear

And then we have depression

We are expected to look sad

If we have a normal face

You say we're really not that bad.

And then today I had a laugh

My GP made a quip

He said if I can open the door

I am healthy and fighting fit

I knew he was taking the Michael

He knows it as do we

ATOS throw you off the sick

They get off with it scotfree

So Dear ATOS doctor

Your quals are an utter farce

And if you think we'll fail again

Then you can go and kiss my A**E

[Hidden]

Wonderful! Clever you, I think you have summed up how so many people feel after a visit to the docs at ATOS ! Jane x

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

Lol, I enjoyed doing this one. I got a like on facebook apparently for the other one. I am noton facebook myself, not my cup of tea xxxxx

[Hidden]

Carol Ann Duffy had better watch out I have a FB account but haven't used it for a couple of years as I couldn't cope with it. I sometimes check in just to see what my children are up to though. Jane x

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

Sung to You'll Never walk alone lol.

When you fill in your form

Hold your pen up high

And don't be afraid of the doc

At the end of the form

Is a place to sign

And the choice of the D W P

Write on through the tears

Write on through the pain

Though your truth be tossed and blown

Write on write on with hope in your heart

And you'll never write alone

You'll never write alone

When you read through your form

Hold the page up high

And don't be afraid of the doc

At the end of the form

when you've done all you can

And the truth will out in the end

Write on through the tears

Write on through the pain

Though your truth be tossed and blown

Write on write on with hope in your heart

And you'll never write alone

You'll never write

You'll never write

You'll never write alone

[Hidden in reply to Ozzygirl64]

Please can I have whatever it was that you had for tea Jx

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

Hubby made a shepherds pie lol. He used potatoes, carrot and turnip for the topping. Maybe it is the combination lol xxxxx

Lin

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

Just for you J to the tune of Whats new pussycat

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

condems, condems

You've got powers

And lots of hours

To spend with you.

So go and powder your cute little turned up nose!

condems, condems

I hate you

Yes, I do!

You and your turned up nose!

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

condems, condems

You're so chilling

And I'm not willing

To care about you.

So go and make up your cute little screwed up face!

condems, condems

I hate you

Yes, I do!

You and your screwed up face!

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

What's new condems? Woah, Woah

condems, condems

You're perniscious

And if my wishes

Can all come true

You'll soon be kissing your sweet little condem butts!

condems, condems

I hate you

Yes, I do!

You and your condem whips!

You and your condem lies!

You and your turned up nose!

[Hidden in reply to Ozzygirl64]

Oh for an OH that can cook (though I guess mine can do a mean Ulster fry). If this is what you do after a shepherd's pie just imagine what you might be capable of after hmmmm....I need some of that pie! J x

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

Lol J

I get moments of madness and I think the condems and everything they stand for is fair game for anyone suffering at their hands...right xxxx(hubby is an excellent cook, you should try his cheese filled mushrooms, to die for)

[Ozzygirl64]

I get angry with Fb at times. I used to go on a freebie sample site, and then the companies started saying 'like us facebook to get this free sample' so I gave up!

xxxxx

[julieevh]

You are a very talented poet / lyricist.

xx

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to julieevh]

Thankyou Julie, if it all makes people smile then job done eh xxxxx

Lin

[cobweb]

Brilliant, you summed it up really well. Really clever!

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to cobweb]

I think we could all do it if we sat back and thought about how we have been treated hun xxxxx

[Speedqueen9]

Another Brilliant post you really are very talented. Thank you for sharing with us and giving us a reason to smile xx

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Speedqueen9]

A reason to smile is a reason to struggle on and a reason to struggle on is a reason to keep smacking this government in the mouth lol xxxxx

[Midori]

Brilliant poems and songs!

Cheers, Midori

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Midori]

Thanks hun xxxxx

[electricjaws]

laughter is the best medicine! (don't tell the government though or they will tax it!!!) or take it away

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to electricjaws]

I agree EJ hun. Laughter is the best medicine, but I find since having all those nasty shooting pains in my face it has left me with a painful jaw which still has not recovered after 4 months, so laughing hurts. I am a miserable cow as I do not laugh very often at the moment. Hubby thinks we have had an eclipse if I crack a smile, and that is hard to do too xxxxx

[Hidden]

wow was really good and so so ture take care xx

[Ozzygirl64 in reply to Hidden]

So glad you enjoyed it hun xxxxx