Fibromyalgia Action UK

understanding (not)

well i started to think that my mum was starting to understand how all this fibro can affect me but after a recent conversation i realised she has no understanding at all

she made me feel like i was lazy i was so dissapointed she is never going to understand how it feels no matter how much she tries she knows im in pain but

she doesnt know how else it can affect me or how much pain i get in or the fact i have the pain all the time just some days i can ignore it more i really didnt know what to say so just agreed with her.

9 Replies

i do that aswell :( its hard to make them understand i dont think anybody does unless they have it


Sara hun you need to sit her down with a nice cuppa and let her read some of this on the forum.She just might get the message.

Sending you love and gentle hugs,an exstremly fed up Butterfly,

They say buttterfly`s only last for so long and I know I can`t unfold my wings at the moment don`t even want to.

So I very much know where you are coming from,I just have a little yorkie to and thank god this wonderful site.

Don`t like to tell anyone but the couple of friends who know.;-(


Hi, maybe you could ask your mum to join this site and read posts and then she will understand. My mum is on here even though she is understanding, however she went through a period of time not being ab;e to cope with the blogs etc as it was too upsetting for her as she then realised the full extent of the illness. xx


Hi my mum asks questions then just says 'oh' when I try to explain, then ten minutes after she'll ask me to lift stuff so i sympathise, wouldn't mind but she has osteo arthritus and tells everyone about the pain all the time...I give up. xx


hi all, i find its close friends who understand the least. one of my best friends keeps saying i should try walking a little further each day to build up but does she not think i havent tried that already???? she would refuse to join a site like this as she has no patience with ill peeps. i have had fibro 4 yrs now so dont think i am able to help her to understand.


Hi Sarah

To be fair it is hard to see and hard for us to understand, Mu Mum says she understands but she hasn't got a clue she is always worse of than me or anyone else come to that lol, My DIL and eldest son don't either I took the trouble to print off loads of info for them to read and they didn't even bother was very upset, now I don't care I kn ow what I am going through every day and so does my hubby and that is very important to me.

But it might well open your Mum's eyes when she sees some of the posts and how badly it does effect us, even if she just reads some from your home page might be worth a try?

Take care Ruby xx


It is a very hard illnes to understand they see there daughter/partner or relative abnd they look the same but say they are this and that and it must be difficult to see, perhapsyou should put this on when they are round and let them have a read of few blogs ??? may change their outlook love to you diddle x


hi hun i know just how you feel my mum will say oh poor so an so my nice who has ME is so unwell but all i have to do is pull myself together . i have the biggest feet and legs with water retention and can't walk . But me just need to pull myself up and get a job and look after my house and i will be better . but my nice was so unwell and she needs moor help . So hay i know what you are feeling . sofft hugs and big big soft arms to hold you from me to you xxxxxx :)


The most truly helpful support I have in my daily travail with Fibro (I have a 'portfolio' of other conditions as well) is from my fellow sufferers in my local Pain Association Scotland Group which meets twice a month. I have gained more knowledge (yes, knowledge) about my condition(s) from the good people in this band than from ANY medic, specialist or otherwise AND there is such good feeling & humour spread throughout that many happy faces reluctantly leave & look forward to the next meeting with relish. Our co-ordinator does say that not every group is as warm & friendly as the group I attend (Rosyth in Fife) but seeing the regular 'weel kent' faces is a true boon.

I do have understanding from my wife but I believe she does find the condition most bizarre but acceptance is sought by everyone we encounter...even our caring persons.

I have now suffered Fibro for four & a half years with no real respite - watch out for the wierd switches such as wild shifts in blood pressure which bring unproductive visits to Cardiology as our symptoms can mimic many other ailments. I hope this message helps? We are told to be philosophical as this helps...ha,ha. What we really want is advice from someone who actually suffers the same condition as we do as how else can we take their advice seriously? xx


You may also like...