Emotional day

[boobooandtom]

Having a really emotional day. Been to doctors for high blood pressure and a ear infection. I know I am not on my own and there are millions of people out there with fybromyalgia. I like others have lost my independence lost my mobility just to mention a few. I can't stop crying I just feel I can't cope anymore. Anybody out there with any coping strategies would be really helpful.

[CM1EDSUK]

I can only speak personally (I don't have fibro but do have daily chronic pain), but feel when you have something else on top of your 'normal' it can feel difficult to cope with.

Some things I use, which I have also seen others with fibro mention; distraction (anything you enjoy such as listening to music, reading, watching a good film, or a hobby you enjoy). Try to reduce your stress by trying this breathing exercise; this will also help with pain: nbt.nhs.uk/sites/default/fi...  

Others try meditation, but for me this breathing exercise is something I use all the time, & to help me sleep. I used to teach it as a physio in things as varied as antenatal & back classes, & it has been my mainstay for years.

Coping isn't easy, but you can do it, & remember you have to think about the 'cans' you still can do, & not the 'cannots.'

[boobooandtom in reply to CM1EDSUK]

Thank you so much for your reply. I will have a go at the breathing exercises.

[Gigiruth]

Hi boobooand TomSorry to hear you are having a tough time. When we are up to max and something else hits us it can feel overwhelming. Ear infections sound like a small thing but hurt so much, affect sleep and that brings us down more.I hope you have help and maybe medication with that.

Take care of you.

Gigi

[boobooandtom in reply to Gigiruth]

Thank you so much for replying. Still a bit tearful this morning but I will plod on. Thank you.

[Shartaylor0264]

Hi sorry you feel so down .i feel the same i get so much pain and feel My life has changed so much to .I try to consontrate on something i like to do .i do knitting and crochet sometines it get a bit difficult because of ostioartheritis in my hands but i persevere. Please try and cheer yourself up by doing something you want to do . Sending hugs.

[boobooandtom in reply to Shartaylor0264]

Thank you so much

[Turquoisesummer]

Hi boobooandtom, I'm so sorry for what you're experiencing. I don't know if I have any coping strategies to suggest as I feel I'm not coping myself, I used to cry a lot because I just couldn't handle everything, but crying made the pain soo much worse I don't even cry anymore. I feel kind of numb like I've given up and am just surviving. I try to go to the sauna most days as I find the heat gives temporary relief which is better than nothing. Alternating sauna with cold showers I find helpful, like a short break away from the overwhelming pain. It's still there but a bit more bearable when I'm in the sauna or under a cold shower. Also swimming, but I can only do a few minutes at a time and float rather than swim if I can lol. This hurts my neck a lot though, but I love the water especially in the mountains near me or at the beach (I'm in Australia, I don't know what the water's like where you are?🙃). Spending time in nature is relaxing for me and can help so if I can spend a day at the beach or at a waterhole in the mountains swimming/floating and laying on the rocks or sand it gives me a day with a bit of relief, especially mentally/emotionally thus helps me to cope. So I suppose these are some strategies I didn't think of as strategies lol. I hope some can help you. Getting lost in a good book helps too but I have trouble reading unless I'm relaxing at the beach or mountain pools because my eyes ache heaps. I don't know if it's mental or physical but when I'm in these places I find I can read without eye pain which is like a miracle to me. Sorry this ended up so long. If it's cold where you are, an electric blanket can be the best thing ever, almost like a heat pack for your whole body. I can't do winter without one! Oh, one last thing, walking my dog when I can manage a walk and hanging out with my young nieces and nephew helps, even though I'm in more pain afterwards, and talking to my sister who is the only person I know who is understanding and empathetic. I feel like I'm drowning/being crushed/wading through quicksand every day and don't feel like I'm coping but these things give me momentary relief even if it's just mental/emotional and not physical. I hope you find relief and things that help you cope. Sending love 💖 and I hope the ear infection clears fast for you. I had one twice and it was probably the worst pain of my life and I've had a lot of pain as you would unfortunately understand..😕 I hope it doesn't get too painful for you, but I feel for you and I understand what you're going through. Take care xx

[boobooandtom in reply to Turquoisesummer]

Thank you so much x

[BlueTofu]

I think there are techniques like distraction and trying to do things you enjoy. Something I saw. Face, Accept Float ( let what is be what it is) Let time pass. I'm trying that with my current rib pain and others. But in the end I think it's connection with people, and doing what you are doing here. Saying I feel rough, and having people respond to you. Seeing people if you can, or talking to them , zooming them. Whatever is possible. It's always a better day for me, when that happens.

[boobooandtom in reply to BlueTofu]

Thank you so much x

[Alecinthesun]

Hey, I am really sorry you feel bad x Been to that place a lot just recently, I had an inner ear infection with dizziness and it feels like one thing after another. I try not to think about it, I try not to think about what I think I might have lost either. I just think, for *uck's sake, women up, I am alive, that is amazing! Then I watch something stupidly funny like faulty towers, probably not politically correct but it's so crazy it makes me laugh hard. I think when you laugh hard you forget everything, that works for me at least. I hope a good, hard laugh might help you too. Chin up sweetheart xxx

[boobooandtom in reply to Alecinthesun]

Thank you so much x

[Elaine200756]

Hi boobooandtom, so sorry to hear how tough things are for you at the moment. When I feel like this it helps me to think about the things I am grateful for and write them down. I tell myself that I am strong and I am going to climb out of this hole anyway I can.

I am sending you a big but very gentle hug. Don't give up, you can do this xx 🤗

[boobooandtom in reply to Elaine200756]

Thank you so much. X

[SlothMode]

Hiya booboo,

First of all I want to give u a huge gentle hug. We all get how u feel. None of us actually copes with fibro, we just have no choice but to go through it. None of us can get off this crazy fairground ride. There is no right or wrong way to treat fibro. U are allowed to have a cry, even a day or two of tears as long as after u get up ready to fight afterwards. Fibro seems to attract other health issues n that on top of fibro can feel like u can’t catch a break n everything is against u. I feel when u are first diagnosed u need to grieve the old u n reach acceptance just as u do a death. Then u can move on n try to make the best life for u. I try to look at my fibro with a positive mind however I do fall apart now n then. I write all my hurt n feelings into short poems n look for small achievements each day. On a bad day I cuddle up on the sofa under my weighted blanket n binge watch Netflix lol! I hope this helps n never forget we are all there fighting alongside u 😊🤗

[Tuscany]

Hi there. I am going through something similar. I think I might have Covid again so I am treating it as such. I have been kept awake for the last 3 nights by a terrible cough, pain going through the roof. I have recently split from my husband so feel totally alone. My daughter had to go and stay with him because I was too ill to look after her. I have a good friend who lives in Spain, and I know she cares, but she doesn't quite get it. She is supposed to be coming over next week and staying. She went out with a friend over the weekend and left me very loud WhatsApp messages and kept saying that we should go on a night out when she is back. For one thing, I will have my daughter, and for another, that is absolutely the last thing on my mind. People just don't know how it feels do they? As you have described, any additional pain or illness just pushes us over the edge and we can't cope.

Sorry to go on about my situation! My coping strategies are normally my electric blanket on my bed. That helps enormously. I also have a weighted blanket on my bed. I take long baths. My new house has a big corner bath and it is like a mini swimming pool. I do like swimming. I can swim for a short time. The only problem is, my local swimming baths are so cold it spoils it a little. Anything with heat helps me cope. Sending a gentle hug and hope you feel better soon xx

[fmlife]

Oh yes the cannot do's most annoying frustrating debilitating mood downer ever,

the best way is to plan 'only one easy task a day

that could be any one thing from rising out of bed, a trip to loo, or making a cuppa,

once completed, celebrate that achievement😁

remember everything else do in a day is a BONUS,

if do not manage to do anything, you have ACHIEVED something, look for the POSITIVES.

being unable to do something is only because have not had the light bulb moment on a method of how to do yet.

Perhaps have not instructed / directed how to do yet.

The hardest thing is to ask for help,

film Magnum force ' A mans got to know his limitations' its an old film convert to 'a persons got to know their limitations'

Its quite possible the tool using is just too heavy to difficult, need to locate something lighter and easier. lots of research may be needed.

break tasks up (PACING) into small amount and rest often,

use aids to help you, standing burns extra energy, think can you do the task sat down.

invest in yourself to make life easier for you. think of aids as transport that enable functions a to b, to c ect. using less energy will let you concentrate on the joyful things really want to do, like learning a craft or sewing, reading, planning gardening.

most important be kind to self, your in fibro life training.

gentle hugs its tough going through this, and having to deal with fibro,

Ask your doc if can do CBT, as you are also grieving your old life.

look up spoon theory,

keep warm and flexible

know your not alone in this journey, talk here as much as you need.

[dinkic]

We all have days like this. Sorry this is one for you. Like others I find distraction techiques help sometimes, others I just have time on my own, as I am not much company when having a really bad day, everyone is different, I know its goes against all the advice but some days I just go to bed and snooze (if I can - sleep is another problem) or sit and listen to music. I hope you feel better soon.