survive : good afternoon, I wanted to... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

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survive

Eagleflyalone profile image
11 Replies

good afternoon, I wanted to thank you for your help, I wait for the repair service to contact me, no shower is terrible,

my physical condition worsens, now I hardly walk, but I have to force myself or I become a fossil, unfortunately, for months I have also been fighting with uterine fibroids, they have taken me several times to the hospital by ambulance, for haemorrhages and blood transfusion

Universal credit gives me the money, but after I pay, electricity, gas, rent, water, telephone, I have 300 clean pounds left, which for food, diapers, painkillers, in the end I have to borrow from a friend,not to mention that my daughter is 17 years old and needs clothes, she is good and does not demand, so I only buy things for her when the other clothes are small.I asked for help for my disability, because fibromyalgia, asthma and arthritis prevent me from working, now then with fibroids, blood and pain all month, I feel dying,I am ashamed to ask for help, I have always worked and now I feel useless

then if you count the fact that the fridge is out of order, the phone, the pc is dying, I have no idea where to turn my head. I don't want the government to believe that I am demanding, but I really need help. 3 pounds in the bank and I have no diapers, I lose blood and I have to use toilet paper, which will soon run out, I only have 2 underwear and, I wash one I put to dry, all night, without sleep

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Eagleflyalone
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11 Replies
Bluelabelle profile image
Bluelabelle

I’m so sorry things are so difficult. It sounds like you’re in a really hard place, and I really hope things improve a bit soon.

Do you get PIP by any chance? Or ESA? (I don’t know very much about these sorts of things but I did a quick google and they’re in addition to universal credit, and they’re the two I get) Is there any chance you could contact your local citizens advice or disability advice service? We went to them when I was turned down for PIP (apparently the people in charge of PIP turn nearly everyone down first go around, so if you have been refused for PIP the disability advice service or citizens advice are still worth reaching out to) and they helped me so much, they were really fantastic. Maybe they know some way you could get a little more help financially?

The way it’s been put to me is this. You have worked, like you’ve said, and you paid the tax and stuff that came with your pay, as well as taxes like VAT and whatever else. In doing that you've essentially put away money with the government against not being able to work. So now that’s happened it’s their turn to help you out.

Nobody should be made to feel ashamed because they can’t work. All that stuff you hear about people being demanding of the government and asking for too much, that’s not aimed at you.

You are most definitely not useless. I know it feels hard to believe, I feel it too, but you have a lot to offer the world. But it’s also the world's turn to give you a hand. It’s not demanding to ask for the help you need and I really hope things look up soon. Sending you a huge, gentle hug.

Eagleflyalone profile image
Eagleflyalone in reply toBluelabelle

pip is reject to me, thanks dear

Bluelabelle profile image
Bluelabelle in reply toEagleflyalone

So we were told the thing with PIP is the form is very difficult to fill in, they want it filled out a certain way but they don’t tell you that up front. Citizens advice or the disability advice service could help you out with that aspect. I really hope that’s somewhat helpful. Don’t give up hope!

Eagleflyalone profile image
Eagleflyalone in reply toBluelabelle

Thank you so much ,i hope you feel good

Bluelabelle profile image
Bluelabelle in reply toEagleflyalone

Thank you! I really hope things improve for you.

R-OD profile image
R-OD

Hi Bluelabella is right you most seek help from professional to either ask for a mandatory reconsideration for PIP if you have recently been refused or start a new claim immediately, this could give you extra on you UC also. If you have a social tenancy then the landlord should be able to help you. You can also get free sanitary products via period poverty, google it there will be a supermarket near you in the scheme. If you daughter is in education then she can see if the college has a discretionary hardship fund she might be able to tap into. There are also charities that can help you, you definitely need a support worker to help you, if you ring your Local Council they should be able to point you in the right direction. Good luck 🤞

Eagleflyalone profile image
Eagleflyalone in reply toR-OD

thanks

Are you aware that because you are on universal credit you can get free shopping from your local food bank?Find your local one and give them a call explaining your situation.

Don't be ashamed it's just hopefully temporary until you have pip approved.

Eagleflyalone profile image
Eagleflyalone in reply toIamthemedicalmystery

it embarrasses me to ask, I know that there are those who are worse off

Iamthemedicalmystery profile image
Iamthemedicalmystery in reply toEagleflyalone

Yes there are but you have run out of nappies and you all need feeding. Please don't be embarrassed the food banks are for people that are in your situation

NPR1 profile image
NPR1 in reply toEagleflyalone

Sorry for the late reply, OM goodness you sound a lot like how i felt last year and all i can do is urge you to get the help that we should all know about.

So get in touch with your doctors and ask to be referred to the social prescriber, they will give you a call and go through anything which you need help with, finances, mental health, a CPN, a housing manager this is the first step. If you find out where your nearest foodbank is they should also be able to refer you to the social prescriber. There is also a charity out there which will give you white any white goods which you need, fridge freezer etc not sure if anyone knows what this is. I would also advise you to go for the PIP it is extremely hard but i was helped through this with the contacts i received from the social prescriber and yes it was rejected but i kept appealing and finally ended up getting standard, it is hard but once you sort out everything else it's a must.

I get your feelings in connection with all of this i found it extremely hard asking for help and a little bit embarrassed having to use the food bank but as someone has already said you deserve this, you need this at the minute. I have worked my whole life and for me to ask for help, for me to be this broken, i just couldn't admit it or let people in I always used to say to myself there are people much worse off than me or i don't want to be a burden, well if you don't stop thinking like that this will just drag on and on. Please pick up the phone and ask for help it's hard, you do feel like a failure that's only natural but its a stepping stone for you it was for me, i had 3 trips to food bank, mental health training, finances sorted and a year on my heads is in such a better place. Communicating with your daughter on how your feeling is also massive, i used to bottle it all until i couldn't hide it any more, mine is 9, she helps me up and down stairs, she keeps the noise down when i can't handle it, its nice, she's not always that nice, ha. Maybe your daughter could become your carer and please don't think you will be burdening her, its good life skills and the main things she may want to take control of is possibly making the call to the doctors and getting you referred for some help.

Take care, be kind to yourself, seek help.

Oh and don't worry about how you may come accross on any of the phone calls, i cried and cried through most of mine but it gets easier. XXX

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