Morning all hope you all managed a good night sleep..
Yesterday I went to a MSK centre to see a physiotherapist.... my doctor has referred me after I had a hip X-ray that came back abnormal... the physio examined me and showed me my xray and said in his opinion the X-ray was normal for a woman of my age ... he then went on to say that my pain was down to my fibromyalgia and he couldn’t help me ... I burst into tears as once again another door shuts in ya face ...
This is the thing that I’m really struggling with is that when my husband and I got in the car he got so angry at the fact I was upset because I said I wouldn’t get my hopes up .... but I couldn’t help it all I needed was a hug...He then said I do t know if I can do this any ...
We’ve will been together for ten years in may and married for 2 years too...
We slept in separate bedrooms last night and his just gone out saying he needs to clear his head....I’ve read so many times that this illness breaks marriages and now I worried that could be me too...
Sorry to be ranting on but you all are the only ones that truly understand xx
I am so sorry maybe just give him time to calm down and he will be ok
I know its really hard to suffer from Chronic Long term pain but I do know that a lot of carers struggle as well ,thay see you day after day and as thay love you want to make things better .But the honest truth is thay cant.
That is so true it is hard for the carers and as time goes on it gets harder and harder for them ... thank you 😊
Hi
I do hope you both manage to sort things out, I know you really need him at the moment. The physio you went to see should at least have referred you for injections. Always here for you. Love and hugs Lynne xxxx
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Thank you oldham12 😊....xxxx
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You are very welcome. Love and hugs Lynne xxxx
Hi mydexter we are all good again ... got to realise more just how tough he finds it too... thank you xxx
Oh wow 47 years of marriage congratulations 😊 definitely not gonna make that long as didn’t get married until I was 49 lol ... xxx
You could try seeing your GP and ask for a referral to a Consultant-lead Pain Management Clinic at a Hospital. They will have experience of helping fibromyalgia patients. There are various treatments, and while they can't erradicate the pain, they do help a lot of us. The NHS website is a useful place to start reading about what might be recommended
Don't give up on yourself or your marriage. There are still options you can pursue, but for both of you, life is not likely to go back exactly to how it was before fibromyalgia, but it can get better than it seems today. Believe me, I've been to hell and back with my fibro over the last 25 years, but we are still together, even though at times it seemed like we might not survive this illness.
Fibro is a killer of relationships; if there is a crack, fibro will get in there.
Is your husband usually supportive? He may need help himself, counselling or something maybe, because Fibro affects the whole family in one way or another.
He may be feeling desperate because he can't help you, but doesn't realise he needs some support himself.
Thank you midori this is the thing he is mostly supportive but I realise now that he does struggle too... we’ve been talking and he said watching me day in day out is hard for him as he loves me so much ....I will give it a try and mention to him about getting support but knowing him I doubt he will .... thank you for replying 😊
Did you mention to hubby that he doesn't need to fix you or get sad or mad, he just needs to be there and give you a cuddle because that is what you need after a disappointment?
It is so easy to feel useless in the face of suffering when really the most powerful thing is to be there and be ready with hugs n cuddles and hand holding. Seems so little but it does a power of good hey?
AI10 it definitely does make all the difference .... I can see now that he suffers too which is why he plays golf that gives him that time not to really think or worry about anything ... thank you for replying 😊xxx
Oh so very very sorry Flower47 to learn that you are so upset and can understand how you must fee. Have you shown your husband this site which maybe give him some insight of how it all is. Although I’m not indirectly sticking up for your husband but can also understand and know that when your looking after the one that is ill, it does play a toll on the other person and this can also be very frustrating, as he may have felt the same as you in thinking your getting some help for yourself and just to be told they cant help you is a big knock back. Taking it out on you as we always do, to the people we love most. Don’t give up - when things are calmer maybe have a heart to heart talk about how you BOTH feel.
I also saw a Physio when I was diagnosed with what they call a Bulging Disc but it didn’t do me any good either. Then paid privately for an Osteo and that also didn’t help. So unfortunately if its FM then I dont think anything helps really. The only thing that helps me is having a hot shower and get walking which eases all the aches and pains. It’s when I stop and sit down for a long period that it all comes back again. Pain Management is suppose to help which is what I am awaiting for only it got cancelled two weeks ago after a long period of waiting and now back dated to January next year!!!
I’m wishing you good luck and best wishes but dont give up!! Zipppy xxx
Thanks Jools56 I did have a Pain Management appointment 2 weeks ago!! Unfortunately it got cancelled by them been waiting since July! Not now till 9th January next year - I was so disappointed. I did complain didnt get me anywhere. Went back to Doctors for her to write again to them but she reckons it will do no good as the waiting list is so long!! I dont think it will do my fatigue any good though as that's what I suffer more from CFS Chronic Fatigue Syndrome🥺🥺 I get so fed up with myself as I like being active and now cant do the things I want to do!! Thanks again Jools. Hope you have had a good day!! xxx
Thanks for your good wishes Zippy09, fibro not too bad but shaking off a cold! I can hardly speak so hubby is pleased it's so quiet! If you're desperate to do PMP you might try this link, but you might have to pay unless your doc can refer you? My NHS pain specialist Kirti is in some of the videos. pathwaythroughpain.com/
I completely understand how you feel. I have felt alone many times and like a hypochondriac. I have so many things wrong with my body. I did do a lot of reading and learned that aspartame- fake sugars can really affect some people. So I quit and my pain levels went down from a let's say 10 to a 4. Then I learned that a diet really really helps me feel better. We started on a Paleo and now are on a Keto. My doctor also has me on Duloxetine Dr 60mg. I am also on other meds for Rheumatoid Arthritis that may help but I doubt it. I can always tell when I have been eating poorly because extreme fatigue and muscle pain returns. Also, if I over due it and work really hard then my fibro kicks in again.
Hi Nancy yes my body reacts exactly as you have described... since my Friday appointment and the knock back I have been reading more about fibromyalgia and read numerous times about how your diet can help so this is my next step looking and changing my diet ...thanks for replying hope you are not in too much pain 😊take care xxx
its a toughie n i hope u get thru this...ive gt fibro and arthritis as well as bulging discs in my neck n the pain is too often beyond words 😞😞..my feet n ankles r so painful and ive nw bn referred to the msk team n its like never ending ...my past experiences with referals hv left me so dwn n out bcuz nobody really hs a solution to offer a way bk to being pain free or even sum small relief ..its hd a knock on effect with my partner but its all about communication & support ..so dnt stress..thru sickness & in health for beta for worse ...sending u hugs n hope it settles dwn for u x
Thank you fiz16 good luck for the MSK team really hope you have better luck then me ... will have everything crossed for you .... that was an upset last Friday but thankfully my husband and I are all good now after chatting and explaining why he got angry with me crying he was worried that another knock back would set me back but luckily it hasn’t ... thank you for taking the time to reply 😊xxx
So sorry to hear that Flower47. I don't know if your local NHS trust runs a Pain Management programme, but I would suggest you have a look online. I'm in Somerset and I am half way through a 7 session course on explaining chronic pain and learning techniques to make life easier (not a cure but it is helping). This link might be a start somersetpain.co.uk/How-to-m... The stress of this is not going to help your pain - altho' places are limited we were told that partners may be able to attend some sessions. It might help your husband to understand things better and help him cope too. Best of luck and gentle hugs!
Thank you jools56 was referred by my doctor but it was quite a way away and couldn’t afford taxi there and my husband couldn’t get the time off to take me .... I’m awaiting my pip renewal and if I get what I had before I am going to go for a motorbility and get a car so then I could take myself and my mum would come with me .... so fingers crossed I will get my pip again ... thank you for replying and hope things are good for you at the mo 😊xxx
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