Don't use the toilet it's for people ... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

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Don't use the toilet it's for people with disability.

francesco-P profile image
38 Replies

Been told yesterday at a store don't use the toilet its for people with disability.

I have a hidden disability Autism & epilepsy & fibromyalgia and a blue badge holder.

Most of pains are inside they hidden.

Should I have to wear this logo.

My Dad has spoken to the store ASDA'S and apparently Autism & Epilepsy & Fibo are not classes as disabilities the toilets are only for noticeable disabilities and would look rather odd if a so called Normal Person came out of the loos it would look suspicious that's why the security told me off.

The store manager head office now have copies of all the disabilities plus my blue badge my travel pass and medical exemption to prove that I was not lying.

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francesco-P profile image
francesco-P
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38 Replies
desquinn profile image
desquinnPartnerVolunteerFMAUK Trustee

I would send a polite feedback letter to the store

Mdaisy profile image
Mdaisy

I agree with Des, and ask them to educate their staff with disability related issues and discrimination :)

francesco-P profile image
francesco-P in reply to Mdaisy

My Dad has spoken to the store ASDA'S and apparently Autism & Epilepsy & Fibo are not classes as disabilities the toilets are only for noticeable disabilities and would look rather odd if a so called Normal Person came out of the loos it would look suspicious that's why the security told me off.

KurtN profile image
KurtN in reply to francesco-P

Show them this -

asdagoodliving.co.uk/commun...

JDQuinn75 profile image
JDQuinn75 in reply to francesco-P

Like you Francesco-P I also have epilepsy as well as hydrocephalus and osteoarthritis. All of these need to be recognized as disabilities. Including autism and Fibromyalgia as well.

FMA_Reece profile image
FMA_ReeceFMA UK Staff

Hi there. Would it be okay for FMA UK to post this as an article on our social media sites? Thanks

francesco-P profile image
francesco-P in reply to FMA_Reece

Sure of course thank you

You could photograph your blue badge and carry that photo with you ( suppose you could keep it on a phone ) You shouldn’t have to, a store should know better and the person who spoke to you needs further training. Feel so angry on your behalf.

AllthatGlitters profile image
AllthatGlitters

WHAT! That’s outrageous.... I can’t believe someone acted in that manner. Not all disabilities are visible. I use the “normal” toilet but due to issues which are a disability when in urgent need I use a disabled toilet x

Bird88 profile image
Bird88

That is disgusting my daughter is autistic we always use the disable as there is more space so she dosent feel uncomfortable or theres only one light may sound daft if u want to use that toilet you do so hun peopke are 2 quick to judge u take care x

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman

While I don't dispute the fact that you have a disability, you have to ask is it one that requires this concession? If you read it does then go ahead and use it, but remember there may be a guy behind you who has IBD or IBS, who really can' t wait and ends up having an accident due to a misuse or misunderstanding of the facility offered.

opalfruits profile image
opalfruits in reply to FRreedman

If I can manage then I'll use the standard toilet facilities. But if I'm exhausted, in pain and there's a queue (as there often is for ladies loos....), I simply can't stand long enough in line to wait. However, I still look 'fine' externally.

carol789 profile image
carol789 in reply to FRreedman

Hi Freedman

I find with my fibro I have little control over my muscles in the peeing and other motions. I thought this quite common with fibro . When I need to go, I need to go, I do wear pads but toilets more hygienic don't you think :) also as my local ASDA toilets upstairs - yes there's a slow lift which I could take - my wee and other motions are often quicker and there's always the stairs hah , my mind sometimes may be willing but my burning aching knees and burning aching feet and balance unfortunately arnt. Fibro is not my friend, I often feel ancient and decrepit. My husband has a colonoscopy bag, that's hidden, when it's full,as often happens very quickly and of course no bladder etc to give indication when needing emptied would at times need to empty it quickly, after all that's the point of a blue badge to make our disabled lives that little bit more manageable, irrespective of the disability. My mum on the other hand lost use of both legs and arm, was in wheelchair but did have control of muscles for peeing and other so could tell when due to "go" and often waited patiently for the disabled toilet to be vacant. I suppose it depends on ability and urgency but let's not judge or be judged . I always fall back on don't assume - as it makes an ass out of u and me. Staff training a definite requirement at that ASDA, disability and equality and diversity I would say.

carol789 profile image
carol789 in reply to FRreedman

I also have ibs amongst other problems, I wouldn't say that puts me in a priority situation over others who are disabled for disabled toilet, disabled is disabled first come and all that. Depending on level of autism their need and that of their carers can be much greater than mine. I have pads and clearer understanding of situations. Perhaps we need more disabled toilets ? AND to increase our knowledge on hidden disabilities such as autism and aspergers and many more don't you agree?

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman in reply to carol789

Of course I agree that more disabled toilets would ease the problem, as would more education.

Claire133 profile image
Claire133

Omg, you need to write to Asda head office, and to the store manager immediately because the security guard was acting unlawfully, that is Disability Discrimination and they can be taken to court for this. The security guard probably has no education or knowledge of what he's actually just commited and the manager and HO will want to know about it.

I completely understand how you must be feeling, I have Aspergers Syndrome, Ankylosing Spondylitis and Fibromyalgia 😥

in reply to Claire133

Raise it on Twitter etc it's out in the open then .

Pbyllis profile image
Pbyllis

Hi same thing happened to me at a k t c the lady that was cleaning the toilets told me I could not use the disabled toilet so I showed her my disabled freedom pass which I have for many years I told her she should be aware that all disability s are not visible .

Vivalaviv profile image
Vivalaviv in reply to Pbyllis

Where do i get a disabled freedom pass ?

Pbyllis profile image
Pbyllis in reply to Vivalaviv

Hi I got my freedom pass years ago after a accident before I ever got diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

Makes me angry, ignore them Francesco. On 2 separate occasions I've seen asda staff members coming out of the disabled toilet. My partner asked him where the staff toiets are he said upstairs..."and?" My partner enquired he shrugged and walked away.. talk about manners some of them have none.

X hugs

in reply to

I would add that I use the disabled toilets because of my severe arthritis and fibro I need the height of the disabled toilet as I cannot get up off the standard toilets plus some of the cubicles are too small to move around in when you walk with aids. I do not agree with staff using the disabled toilets because they could have easily used the normal toilet they were too damned lazy to walk upstairs to the staff toilets.

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman in reply to

Are you sure they don't have an invisible disability? What makes you more qualified to judge than that security guard? As I have said, already, if you need it, use it, if you don't, please leave it for someone who does!!

in reply to FRreedman

I use walking aids and need the higher toilet

Who are you the disabled toilet police?

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman

I think, Ajay, that using a disabled service "because I can" and not due to need , will reduce the effectiveness of everything that retail outlets now provide. They do not have to provide disabled toilet for us, but if they do, then we should use them when we need to, and look after others who are more in need of this particular benefit than we are.

Vivalaviv profile image
Vivalaviv in reply to FRreedman

Building regulations now include disability access so we no longer have to rely on the charity of the 'retail outlets'

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman

Autism, on it's own, and dependant on the person concerned, does not always result or require urgent access to toilet facilities, however, as I stated above, I agree that, if it is necessary, then of course the facility should be used. IBD or IBS, however make urgent access to a toilet an absolute need, and that too, is an invisible illness, so I don't quite understand why you originally doubted my reply to Francesco.

I have autism and I use the disabled toilets. One for the space and so I don’t feel to enclosed, 2 for the fact I don’t want to be around other people witch causes anxiety some toilets are packed out and people lining up to use the cubicles, many reasons why. Sensory difficulties being another, needing help on the toilet . Some people with autism don’t know how to use the toilet at many ages, needing someone else in a small cubicle isn’t practical. My cousin is 21 and she doesn’t understand how to use a toilet.... maybe in the future think through what your saying

I know. I was referring to the other person lol

So how about people that have Stoma's and Catheters plus wear pads all walking wounded but all a Disability but not totally disabled

So many things count as a disability which is anything that wouldn't be with a normal life so you have to make changes/allowances with life.

Where as disabled is a more permanent functional thing like a wheel chair

And Lock your post!!!

Sue_64 profile image
Sue_64

Disgusted by this. I have bowel and bladder issues and because of a lack if public toilets I found the Website: bladderandbowelfoundation.org, on the site you can request a just can't wait! card. It's looks like a credit card and simply states the holder has a medical condition needs to use a toilet quickly, that's all, no further reason or explanation given or needed. I've used mine to show a manager in our bus station because the disabled toilet is always locked and I don't always have a 20pence coin for the other toilets. You can use it anywhere like to request to use staff toilets in a store where there no customer ones or even a Pub or Cafe which might be nearest to where you are. As Ajay says a Radar Key is a good idea and is only a small charge but I've had mine years so not sure of charge. All the best Sue 🤗🤗

Vivalaviv profile image
Vivalaviv in reply to Sue_64

Thx Sue followed the link & going to apply.

carol789 profile image
carol789

Totally with you on this Francesco. ASDA so in the wrong.

FRreedman profile image
FRreedman

What's the matter Ajay? Lost another argument? I am not judging! I didn't say the staff shouldn't use the loo! I didn't say the staff "looked" able-bodied!!!

Vivalaviv profile image
Vivalaviv

I have fibro & have noise sensitivity too. Those hand dryers send me into shock. One of the many reasons i use the disabled loo. Hand rails are pretty useful if you use a toilet frame at home. I also look 'normal' but using a stick helps

You are so right thank you Ajay x

Hi well posted about it on ASDA twitter feed!

Let's see what comes back???

waylay profile image
waylay

ARGH!

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