Benefit Help Please

Hi all.

fI was a full time carer for my 86 yr old mom but she's sadly passed away in 27/7/15 i'd say it was co depency. We kinda looked after each other. She was my reason to get up, to to carry on regardless of how much pain i was in.

It's a long story but for now can anyone advise me please on what beneits i may be entitled with my medical conditions to as my head is all over the place as i am grieving at the moment after losing her.

1994: Diagnosed with Depression and on anti depressants since then.

2005: Diagnosed with Fibromyalgia n on meds. Lost my only sister too.

2007 Diagnosed with Inflammatory Arthritis. ( no RF) but later that year had RF so confirmed diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis.

Restless Leg Syndrome

Had endless joint injections in my knee and aspirations, More steroid injections in my left shoulder, both hands by thumbs but now my fingers are looking all crooked like witches fingrs as ffinger joints are swollen, same with my big toe and ankles it's sometimes so difficult to walk due to the swelling

I have Cervical Spondolysis

Dec 2009 had my left hip replaced due to OsteoArthritis.

June 2010 had my right hip replaced with OsteoArthritis.

Now chronic pain and depression is worse and my head is all over the place because i have just lost my nom on 27/7/15. No savings or income either, Should i apply for ESA or DLA?

I'm on:





Folic Acid

Arcoxia 120mg - For RA

Sufasalazine 2000mg-For RA

Quinoric 400mg-For RA

Methotrexate Injections 20ml-For RA

Rituximab Intravenous Infusion 1st 22/9/15 2nd 06/10/15-For RA






Thank you in advance

Last edited by

14 Replies

  • Hi cheekyminx,

    Firstly, please can I offer you my condolences on the sad loss of your mum, this must still be an exceedingly difficult period for you.

    Fibromyalgia Action UK have a telephone helpline for benefits which you may find useful, so I have pasted it below for you:

    Fibromyalgia Action UK Benefits Helpline: 0844 887 2450

    I have also pasted you a link to the benefits section of Fibromyalgia Action UK which is our mother site:

    I have also pasted you links to the GOV.UK cache on PIP (Personal Independence Payment which has replaced DLA) and ESA:

    It may also help to book yourself an appointment at your local CAB (Citizens Advice Bureau) as they also tend to have a benefits advisory section. I want to genuinely and sincerely wish you all the best of luck with whatever benefits that you apply for.

    All my hopes and dreams for you


  • Hi Ken

    Thank you so very much for your prompt reply. Aww thank you yes i feel as though my heart has been ripped out.

    Aww thank you so much for the links n help i really appreciate it, i will check them out asap.

    God bless u for being there to show me the way.

  • Morning Cheekyminx . I am so sorry to hear of your mums passing.. I can only imagine how you are feeling ..My mother had a heart attack two weeks ago and I was in a terrible state ,at the thought of losing her . She pulled through and is on the mend thank god .

    Hope you get the help you need .am sending you gentle hugs .

  • Sorry for your loss, must be tough when so much of your life is changed, and the loss of your sister. It is good that you were able to have a good relationship with her, something I envy. My mum died August last year but not a good relationship.

  • Sincere condolences. Try to get some support bereavement in the healthy can be exhausting so you must be totally fatigued try to eat hot meals

    Treat yourself to something you enjoy all of a sudden you have time to yourself & now concentrate in no.1

    We are all here for you

    Hugs to all

  • Hi sorry to hear of all your troubles. . . I would say you should qualify for benefits and maybe even some social care. The thing to remember to explain in any medical assessments is how your conditions affect you on a daily basis if you can not only perform tasks, but whether you can perform them reliably and accurately. Also a clear description of your worst day and your best with an idea of the ratio of good to bad. I would also advise you to get as much psychological help as you can to help you learn to live with chronic ill health. Talk to your doctor about pain management programs and CBT. You don't need to suffer alone there is help out there if you are willing to help yourself. You may even benefit from bereavement counselling Keep positive, find something to smile about every day, reach out to others; there are others who suffer as you do, appreciate all that is good and beautiful about nature in this amazing world we have. 😊 With all good wishes...

  • Hi cheekyminx, first I'm so sorry that your mum has passed, it's an awful place for you to be in , I remember it well. Perhaps your GP could refer you for some grief counselling when you feel ready? You have had some great info on your replies, can I just add the 'work and benefits' website is also full of valuable information so check it out. For £20 a year you can download all there guides to claiming benefits, its very helpful;

    Look after yourself

    gentle hugs

    Jo x

  • I am so sorry for your loss. Caring in such a fill time job I know and have been there several times and it leaves a big hole in your life when the person you cared and loved dies . I don't think people appreciate how it takes over your life and how it is really difficult to start building a new one especially when. You are I'll yourself.

    ESA and PIP are the two you should apply for. As other have so rightly said get as much he!p with the forms you can and also support for you with your emotions. Remember grief is normal and you have to work through all the various stages so be gentle with yourself. Please let us know how you get on and whether we can be ofany further help?😃

  • I am so sorry for your loss. I can't offer any help about services in England but I know when my mom was ill for 3 years and died, my symptoms got worse for some time. I can only offer my hope and prayers for you to get the assistance you need

  • Just wanted to say sorry for the loss of your Mum, it's worse when you are so close I lost my Mum in 2003 and still miss her every day, we were more like sisters, I was a carer like you and after she died I went downhill everything just went wrong, it takes time to adjust to a different way of life, Take care of yourself

  • Hi i been reading all the posts that come along so i have not disappeared just in case any one was wondering but i doubt that somehow.yes i know self pity LOL

    so what i was going to say is check to see if your council have a welfare rights or if you put that into google for your area it might come up with lots of different ones. We have one call mind and they help out with all the forms and explain things but also as they others have said the CAB is good to if you can get an appointment.

  • Hi you have my condolences,you can't replace a parent ,and they are never the right age or time , you have had a lot of advise from others on here but perhaps a disabilities advocate would also help you get eXgrid help and advice and they can come with you to any meeting for your general well being , to heads better than one etc . Take care

    Hugs Chris X

    Ps also they can help with form filling and you can find them in your area by putting in your county or city name and disability advocate service .

    Good luck x

  • Hello Cheekyminx, I read your post and you have certainly been in the wars and continued to be so. I offer all my support to you and warm hugs, but gently given.

    Your question about benefits is simple apply for both ESA (in the support group of possible) or the work group will be given and the push to get you to go back to work.

    Apply for PIP (new claims go there and not for dla), get help and fill out all your conditions and medications, even in the order you take them,,,, you will see that many have been through the process and had to appeal or got good out comes, this is a very stressful thing to go through. Do you drive? or you can take taxi's, if so apply for the mobility benefit this either gives access to a car (high rate need for this) or take the cash and use it for taxi's or for friends to help you travel.

    Visit your gp,get any referrals needed and let them know you are applying for these benefits, and they will likely be contacted for medical details.

    Get all the support you can and as many contacts you can to keep you in good spirits, and look at the sun shine when ever you can.

    Everybody here is routing for you, blessings to you for the time ahead.

    ttfn from Karen.

  • It is hard when your world suddenly changes. My father-in-law died last Christmas. The advice I would give is to speak to the CAB or a Welfare officer as they will help fill in forms to support you. You could also speak to social services and see if you qualify for any help. In my borough we offer assisted bin collections which mean I dont have to drag it from the front of the house as I fall a lot.

    Check with your local library or check on line for your area and see if they have any free or low cost courses. In my area we have free knit and knatter groups, reading clubs and even writing groups. I find establishing a new routine helps me remain positive.

    Sending you hugs take care.

You may also like...