Being around pregnant woman while having fertility treatment

[Melsunshine]

I am going away with 2 friends, both who know my infertility journey and struggles with TTC. (PCOS, 18months TTC, 2 cycles of Letrozole for ovulation induction which I haven’t responded to).

We would all talk about being on maternity leave together, our future babies etc and are all very close friends. One of the woman has recently fallen pregnant after 1-2 months of TTC. I am happy for her, it’s how it should be for woman!

But equally so utterly sad for myself and it’s just a reminder of how unfair infertility is. I know my feelings are valid but I am worried about going away all together with the baby chat - which my friends are sensitive but we can’t not talk about her pregnancy. She gets to share her due date, preparing for a baby and I have failed infertility cycles and no certainty when or if I will be able to fall pregnant. And I’m struggling with how I’ll get through the trip without breaking down.

Any advice?

[CJohns]

I totally understand your apprehension about the trip, and it’s totally valid to feel like that.

You’ll probably find that the baby chat will be quite limited especially if she’s very early on in her pregnancy - there won’t be a huge amount to say. You may just need to distract yourself when baby stuff is brought up, or pretend you need a wee. It might also be worth mentioning to your non pregnant friend in advance that you may need to remove yourself from situations.

I’m not sure what type of trip it is, but if it does involve shopping then you may find them looking at baby clothes and that could be quite triggering? So if it does and you go to any shops with children’s clothes/toys etc you may just say that you are going to go and have a look at XX items that you really need and that you’ll meet them back at XX place in XX minutes. I remember going shopping with a friend who had two girls aged 3 and 4 while I was in the midst of fertility struggles and prepping for IVF, and we walked passed baby clothes in primark and she picked up a baby grow and awwed saying she loves it when they’re that small. It was never malicious, but crikey it upset me and stuck with me. xx

[JA-fnuk Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hope you have people around you for support at this time Please take a look at our website fertilitynetworkuk.org "Access Support " to find a group near you

Take care

Janet-Partner