**sensitive** BFN - Is it me?!

[Pinklily2]

Hi All,

Back story of our first FET - Egg collection in February, ICSI resulting in 3 day 5 embryos, PGT done with 1 viable little embryo. Got booked in for medicated treatment cycle in August (prostap >buserelin>progynova 6mg>cyclogest 400mg x2) & transfer done 6th September - Thankfully our embryo survived the thaw and we were told it was looking really good and starting to hatch (6AB grade I think). On transfer day no issues, advised everything looked well. Continued vitamins and meds religiously as always, had acupuncture done for 2.5 months beforehand, last internal scan before transfer showed womb lining was 9.5mm, acupuncture done the evening before transfer and unfortunately we had a BFN after 2WW.

Having difficulty processing and accepting the BFN, IVF has been our journey through male factor infertility and I’m feeling like after all the hurdles to get to where we are, my body has failed our little embryo as I feel we “ticked” all the other boxes and it wasn’t successful.

Had to let all that out, so thank you for reading ❤️

Pending reply from our clinic about what happens next and just feeling absolutely defeated if I’m honest!

[Darcy1996]

oh goodness I’m so sorry. I know it’s hard when you need & want answers but do try not to bland yourself, there’s so many reasons the transfer may not have worked. Be kind to yourself & when you’re ready, have questions prepped for your clinic but sometimes as cruel as it feels, there might not be 1 answer for why. I’m so sorry and sending virtual hugs

[Pinklily2 in reply to Darcy1996]

Thank you! Don’t even know where to start with questions for the clinic tbh, and like you say, there might not be any answers which doesn’t seem helpful at all. Might be able to get myself in a more positive headspace once my period is done, that has just added insult to injury 🫠 x

[HedgehogMad]

Really sorry you are going through a bfn, it's really hard. The studies show that euploid (PGTA normal) embryos have a 65-70% chance of implantation, if they don't implant then most of the time it's due to something else with the embryo that wasn't quite right. After three euploid transfers the statistics say there is a 95% chance of having a live birth so it's very likely the doctors will say to keep going for now. It's unlikely to be a problem with you 🙏 hang in there xxx

[Pinklily2 in reply to HedgehogMad]

Thank you! Having difficulty digesting with how well that one little embryo was doing and from what I’d read spontaneous hatching was a good sign too so that gave us more hope that it would stick. Stressed but trying my best 🤞🏼✌🏼❤️ x

[Wishinandahopin]

hi lovely, I’m so sorry you experienced this. I have had similar experiences.

We did ivf ICSI for male factor infertility, did pgta testing and got 2 ‘normal’ embryos, the other 3 were mosaic.

Prepped everything perfectly, similar to you, and then had the first normal one transferred. BFN. Was told there was a 70% chance of it working with a euploid embro, still so still probably embryo issue. We went again without changing anything our second euploid. Another BFN. By this point the statistics of two in a row not working was 12.5% so I knew we were in the minority at this point.

We did another egg collection round and I got no more euploid embryos but I got 2 more mosaic.

My clinic said I would be best trying another transfer with a mosaic embryo (especially as they are now shown to have good outcomes). But at this point I was convinced there must be something wrong with me too to have been so unlucky with the transfers. I then went through a lot of tests and they did find some genetic immune issue thing which meant it was highly unlikely to work and if it did I would likely miscarry (this was quite rare though so we were v unlucky) The next transfer I was on different medication and did a different protocol. And my son is now 7 months and perfectly healthy.

So that is all to say- one failed euploid can be unlucky, 2 could be v unlucky or could be something going on and 3 failed ones there is def something else going on. With limited embryos and all ‘mosaic’ I didn’t want any ‘what ifs’.

So that’s just my experience. A lot will probably depend on how your next egg collection goes, number of embryos wise, and whether you have any euploid and mosaics etc.

keeping everything crossed for you! 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

[Pinklily2 in reply to Wishinandahopin]

Thank you! We are NHS patients and I’m sure that they don’t transfer mosaic embryos. I’ve started to browse additional testing and checks that I can have before moving forward to try eliminate another few things so thanks for your suggestions of what you went through ❤️

At egg collection I had 27 eggs to begin with but as you know the numbers significantly reduce, we almost had 4 available for PGT but the last one didn’t develop as we hoped. 2 were confirmed to have the gene my husband carries (apparently balanced reciprocal translocation) and discarded which left us with our 1 little approved embryo, was also gutting that we didn’t have more to freeze and were starting to become super hopeful that “it only takes 1”.

Congratulations on your son ❤️ People sharing their stories on here gives me hope! 🤞🏼

[Wishinandahopin in reply to Pinklily2]

It’s really bad if they won’t transfer mosaic embryos as all the research shows that some of them are almost as likely to work as Euploids. But I understand them not transferring Aneuploids (abnormal) ones as that is standard and v unlikely to work.

But from reading your experience it sounds like you had PGT-SR testing to test for balanced translocation? Did they also check whether the one embryo that did not have it was also chromosomally euploid?

And yes I imagine they def won’t transfer ones showing the translocation even if they are otherwise normal or mosaic.

24 eggs to 3 embryos is a fairly significant reduction, I’m so sorry you had that. That is a lot lower than average, alongside the balanced translocation does your partner also have very low sperm quality? If not I would say there may be an egg issue too with those numbers.

Unfortunately NHS tend to do a one size fits all approach, but hopefully they can help you with options!

That said, the likelihood is you got unlucky first time round and next time it’ll work! I just had such an awful experience that I tend to look at everything and every possible thing that could be an issue 🙈 but yes it gave me hope to hear similar stories. So keeping everything crossed for you - and sending you strength xx

[Pinklily2 in reply to Wishinandahopin]

Mosaic embryos can be a question that we can ask for a definitive answer! It was PGT-A we had done (I’m not well educated on all the PGT stuff, my mind was blown when they told us what chromosomes had switched places and what the outcomes of that can be). Part of the genetic chromosome issue my husband has causes low sperm count & mobility which was why it was ICSI.

With those egg numbers as well that’s why I’m wondering if it’s an underlying “me issue”. 15 fertilised and 3 made it to day 5 then down to 1 after PGT. Initially with what was collected I was super naive and hopeful we’d have plenty to play with and plenty frosties too.

Thanks again for your advice and well wishes 🥰 x

[Tiger37]

Sorry to hear - it is so frustrating, but no it doesn’t mean there is an issue with you, it’s your first transfer and unfortunately IVF does seem to be a bit of a numbers game. We also had ICSI and after our first transfer failed our clinic had my Vit D, thyroid, lupus anticoagulants, cardiolipin and beta 2 glycoproteins tested to see if any were affecting implantation so may be worth asking about if you haven’t already had those tested.

Our first egg collection my body also responded quicker than expected so they had to trigger me early meaning not as many eggs were retrieved as they had hoped so they have changed my protocol going into the second collection. The first round does seem to be a bit of a learning round.

My husband also decided to see a private urologist before we tried again to see if anything other than lifestyle changes and supplements could be done to improve his sperm count. In our case there wasn’t, but it might be worth looking into.

Look after yourself, it’s a hard journey, all the best x

[Pinklily2 in reply to Tiger37]

Thank you! And thanks for your suggestions of additional checks and tests, I’ll be keeping those in mind! I’m curious if any of the extra checks you had done came back with anything if you don’t mind sharing??

Definitely feel liked we have muddled through in the dark with this first round, taking each stage as it comes! Waiting for a response from our clinic, and waiting seems to be all you do throughout this journey which itself is exhausting 🫠

Thanks ❤️ x

[Tiger37 in reply to Pinklily2]

Hi, my Vit D was low so I started on high dose over the counter supplements and my TSH was slightly raised so they started me on levothyroxine and it came down within 3 weeks. The last 3 were all negative.

It is exhausting and absolutely get what you mean about muddling through - there is so much to learn and it feels like you have to educate yourself a lot! X

[Pinklily2 in reply to Tiger37]

Thank you for sharing! I think if you have some additional things checked and there things to do to help get it sorted then it’s worth it!

Getting pregnant is not easy, not like we were led to believe growing up, zero preparation in life for IVF, guess we gotta just continue to muddle through it like we have been doing and hope for a happy ending 🤞🏼❤️ x

[Promisekeeper]

Oh gosh I'm so sorry. It is so shocking when everything looks good and logically you just can't think of a reason why it didn't stick. My first FET back in April didn't work as well and I just couldn't accept it. My embryo thawed well and it was looking really good and lining was good too. I was feeling so positive and it was a shock that the test was negative. When I finally saw my consultant she said sometimes it just doesn't work and to keep trying, there is no guarantee even when things look good.

Understandable to feel absolutely defeated. Allow yourselves to grieve and take good care of yourself. x x big hug x x

[Pinklily2 in reply to Promisekeeper]

Thank you! And it doesn’t help that the meds give you all the symptoms too, feels like your in your little 2WW wait bubble - Feeling positive and hopeful then BOOM - Bubbles burst! The day we got the BFN I felt physically ill, lump in my throat all day, sore head & eyes nipping from crying and since then I haven’t felt much tbh which itself is probably a coping strategy. Just need to go through the motions of it all I suppose. Think once my period passes I’ll be able to give myself a shake and get back into better habits again 🤞🏼

Thanks! ❤️

[Promisekeeper in reply to Pinklily2]

I felt the same as you! Literally I was convinced I was pregnant with all the hormones etc. It was so cruel. I even thought the tests were faulty!

Take your time with the grief. Everyone is different with it. I thought I was 'over' it after a few days and I went and got a new hair cut, had a weekend trip with hubby and went out and see friends etc.. but a few weeks later the grief just hit again and I was so demotivated with everything. I've taken a few months to heal and feel much better now. If you want to chat you can message me x x

[Pinklily2 in reply to Promisekeeper]

Thank you so much 🥰 I suppose it’s similar to all loss, comes and goes in waves. Think this journey can show us that we are stronger than we know, even with the days that are a big struggle ❤️❤️ x

[Kitkat10]

I’m so sorry to read this, I know how you feel, I felt the same 🩷 You’re body didn’t fail, you’re amazing just to navigate this IVF process. I fully expected my first transfer to work and felt completely devastated when it didn’t. It does feel bleak for a short while, try and give yourself some time out to let the feelings soften.

My clinic kept saying that the embryo wasn’t the ‘one’ and it seems that there is a lot that is unknown about why some embryos implant and others don’t. I didn’t make enough to ever have them tested.

It may help to write down any questions you think of over the next few days, to ask the consultant at the follow up. I hope this doesn’t sound insensitive, but to get 3 x 5 day embryos is good and it sometimes does come down to numbers and trying again. I had 3 cycles to get my son and each cycle, I only managed to get 1 day 5 embryo (we are MFI too) so you have done so much better than I did. Hang in there, you’ll get there, sending love and positivity x 🍀🍀

[Pinklily2 in reply to Kitkat10]

Thank you for this ❤️ Yeah I’ve been re-reading everyone’s replies and thinking about what questions we can ask, but like you say - Sometimes there’s no rhyme or reason as to why it doesn’t work unfortunately 💔

I’m so glad you got your miracle boy, it’s the posts and responses like this that continue to give me hope, thanks 🥰 x