Scan News / Limbo 💔: Hey, I’ll try... - Fertility Network UK

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Scan News / Limbo 💔

XOXO13 profile image
21 Replies

Hey,

I’ll try keep this short. After my miscarriage in June, we fell pregnant to our surprise and got a positive test end of August. My cycles average between 25-32 days and I ovulated on CD19. Therefore I could be anywhere between just shy of 6-7 weeks pregnant but based on my last period date, the EPU documented me as 7 weeks and I had a scan today.

The sonographer showed me that she could see the sac and yolk sac, but felt it was too early to see the embryo. I asked if it meant I’m going to miscarry and she said it didn’t mean that, it could just be too early and was a little more positive. I cried with a little bit of relief as scans are very triggering for me and walked back to the EPU.

The nurse was much more negative and said she expects things to change in the next week and that I’ll likely miscarry 💔 I asked if it could be that I’m earlier than expected and she said maybe, but for the size of the sac, she’d expect to see the embryo so told me to expect the worse.

If I miscarry, this will make it my fourth and honestly, I don’t think I have it in me to try again or go down the route of IVF again. I feel numb to the pain and I’m so tired of this journey and how challenging it’s been. I am SO incredibly blessed to have 2.5 year old twins from our fourth transfer and second egg collection, we just really hoped for a sibling and whilst they help to make all of this a little more bearable, it still stings my heart that this is how it is for us.

I know the next week could go either way but I’m not sure how to handle it all. It just really sucks 💔

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XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13
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21 Replies
Millbanks profile image
Millbanks

Oh my love, what a horrible situation.

You honestly never know - it’s so much easier to know the exact dates with IVF so with a natural pregnancy it could just be out a little bit.

Keeping everything crossed for you. When are you being scanned again?

It’s really is so shitty - losing one is bad enough but 4, I cannot imagine how strong you must be to even be here again xx

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toMillbanks

I went into the scan feeling anxious but hopeful and positive because I really thought this time would be different, we would be lucky. All that hope has been shattered because I’ve pretty much been told it’s unlikely to progress.

I have a scan again in a weeks time, so I should be between 7 or 8 weeks pregnant by then I guess if my dates are out which I know they could be. I just now have this overriding sense of doom planted there by the midwife so I feel silly for ever feeling like this time would be different.

I don’t think I’ve got it in me to go through this again. It’s making all the old memories and pain of everything before the twins resurface and I don’t know how to bottle that up 💔 xx

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks in reply toXOXO13

Please don't feel silly - we always have to have hope.

With my mmc they couldn't see anything at 6+4 except the sac, but at 7+4 they could see the fetal pole. Granted mine didn't progress but it was measuring 9 days behind. With yours you just don't know exactly where it should be, so there is definitely still hope.

I think don't bottle it up - allow yourself to feel it all - it's awful for sure but it's part of you and pushing it down probably won't help you. xxx

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toMillbanks

It’s such a hard, hard journey isn’t it 💔

Thank you. I want to be hopeful and I need the midwife to be wrong for my own mental wellbeing. It’s going to be a very tough, long week and I’m also doing it alone as hubby is away traveling with work for a few days 😭

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks in reply toXOXO13

It truly is so hard. All your emotion poured in to this one little embryo - it's exhausting.

Oh no! That's so hard. But at least the twins will keep you busy!! I know it's impossible not to overthink it but try and keep on a level. There's a good chance it could go either way so try to stay in the middle, hope but realism...

Sending love xxx

hifer profile image
hifer

Keeping everything crossed for you. It's so so tough

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply tohifer

Thank you 🤍🙏🏼

Chel91 profile image
Chel91

So sorry you're in this situation. My first scan the doctor was very negative, but it all turned out ok. Hopefully they just can't see properly or the dates are wrong as you said. I know the anxiety is awful though. I'm keeping everything crossed for you to get good news 🙏🏻 🙏🏻 xx

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toChel91

Thank you, I’m really praying things take a better turn next week and it’s positive news too 🙏🏼 It’s only been a few hours but I’m already struggling with the news that it may not be. I’m really glad in your case it turned out okay 🤍

Doodlebug23 profile image
Doodlebug23

I understand the need to be realistic but hope is a wonderful thing and it’s cruel to just take it away. I’m sending you positive vibes ✨

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toDoodlebug23

You’re right, thank you 💛 I’ve woken up feeling sick and just so tired, it feels cruel to have symptoms that may not be for good reasons but I’m hoping it’s a positive sign 💛

Doodlebug23 profile image
Doodlebug23 in reply toXOXO13

Every step of this process is just so hard isn’t it! Cannot imagine going through a pregnancy not feeling all this worry!

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toDoodlebug23

Definitely, miscarriages has robbed me of the innocence of seeing those two lines on a pregnancy test. It’s just short lived excitement turned to fear, panic and anxiety xx

Doodlebug23 profile image
Doodlebug23 in reply toXOXO13

I’ve only had 1 MC so I can only imagine partly how you feel. X

Daisy30Lane profile image
Daisy30Lane

Oohhh huni! 😓I really feel for you I do! It’s the waiting that’s the WORST and scans are so so triggering! I think you’ve got a positive and there’s a sac there so it’s all positive! 🙏🏽 maybe just too early to see the tiny embryo yet!? I’ve heard so many stories the same as yours, and they have gone a week later and can see the tiny baby then. Remember every pregnancy is so different! Doctors and nurses have to prepare you for the worst, but just cling onto any positives to get you through ( I know it’s easier said than done!) 😓 It’s so unfair we have to go through this, but we are here for you and sending positive love and hope your way! X

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toDaisy30Lane

Thank you so much 🥹 I’m really trying to stay positive and hopeful. The waiting is really, really hard and slow. A week feels like forever in moments like this, doesn’t it! Xx

Daisy30Lane profile image
Daisy30Lane in reply toXOXO13

Yes it does! More like 3 months! 😭 thinking of you! You’ve got this! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Aww I'm so sorry to hear your news. I hope that aggressive midwife is wrong. Huge hugs. Hope the twins are good.xx

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply toCinderella5

Thank you 🤍 twins are wild, definitely keeping me busy and he’s distracted. Hope yours are doing well too xx

minny_223 profile image
minny_223

I’m so sorry to read this, I’ve got everything crossed that you get positive news xxx

XOXO13 profile image
XOXO13 in reply tominny_223

Thank you so much 😢🤍

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