Hi there, I posted just over a week ago as I had a bleed at 6wks 4days after a successful FET.
I booked a scan the next day and they discovered a subchorionic hematoma around the gestational sac. At that point there was no heartbeat so they said I had to go to the EPU for a second scan in a weeks time. It was the worse week waiting but when I went for the second scan they confirmed there was no heartbeat and baby had stopped growing around 6+3 wks. This will be my second miscarriage and we’re both just so lost and utterly devastated. We thought that maybe it was out time since in between these miscarriages I had a failed fresh transfer too.
I was put on clexane (blood thinners) and I read that being on them can increase the risk of these subchorionic hematomas, so I am now upset I was in them as it was only precautionary - I have a genetic predisposition for developing clots but never had one.
I’ve decided to wait at home for a natural miscarriage to happen and i stopped my meds about 2.5 days ago. I’ve had the odd cramps but nothing else. As heartbreaking as it is, I just wondered if anyone else has had this or similar and roughly how long it took for things to start happening? Just wondering how long is ok to wait for the meds to get out the system? My clinic haven’t been much help with sound advice unfortunately and feel a bit left to the wind now. If anyone has any similar experience or advice I’d be so grateful to hear as awful as this situation is and would have been for anyone. 💔
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Oh love I am so so sorry. My miscarriage came about a week after a scan that was inconclusice but at that point I was so uneducated - there hadn't been anything but an empty sac at 6 weeks but I was none the wiser and they didn't explain the situation to me and just booked me in for another scan 2 weeks later. I didn't make it to that point and yes, the MC came about a week after that for me - this was a natural pregnancy though, so not sure if it's different with IVF/medicated. I know for some women it can be fairly speedy but for others it can be a bit longer - did you get given any guidance on how to manage/deal with this? For a colleague of mine who recently went through this (no HB at 8 weeks) she said it took about 2 weeks for it to start happening.
I am truly sorry to hear this love, I really am. There are no words but I know you'll be OK in the end, you will. And armed with knowledge (and complaints!) for next time. Hope you can look after yourself as much as possible at this time xx
Thanks so much for replying, it’s really appreciated and the info and shared experiences/ advice are what help get you through sometimes.
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss and also the lack of information you needed at the time, that’s just not ok.
I’m going to wait it out and hope it all happens naturally- I’ll take the pill if nothing happens in the next couple of weeks. We’re going back to trying naturally for a bit again after this as the reason for IVF was due to my partner having cancer but all good now 💜
I'm so sorry. It's an awful emotional rollercoaster and hard to accept how much is out of your control.
When I was diagnosed with a blightd ovum (empty gestaiontal sack) at around 7 or 8 weeks pregnant, i stopped all medication and it took up to a week for me to have a bleed. It was a really tough time as I just wanted it over with. I was also told if a bleed didn't happen in about 10 days - 2 weeks then i could consider taking tablets for management.
Fortunately for me the cramps weren't bad and it felt like a heavy period. I hope you can get past this cruel blip as soon as possible and onto whatever plans are for you next x
Hi there, Thankyou and I’m so sorry for what you experienced too. It’s so hard after seeing that positive test which you find yourself in disbelief anyway! Then to be suddenly let down again is so hard.
I’m glad to hear it all happened naturally for you and wasn’t too bad. I guess that’s the best we can ask for in this situation.
I’m going to wait a while too and hope it happens naturally. 💜
Hey lovely, sorry to hear about your experience. I had red bleeding around about the same time as you due to a subchorionic hematoma, but I was told they don't affect the baby and I'm now 34 weeks pregnant. Please don't beat yourself up about the blood thinners. Subchorionic hematomas are really common in IVF pregnancies, with or without blood thinners (I wasn't on them but still developed it), and they aren't usually a problem if them happen in early pregnancy. It's unlikely that the blood thinners made the difference.
Prior to this pregnancy I had a chemical pregnancy and was advised to have at least one period before trying again. So I was told that I would need to go through the miscarriage, wait a month for my period, and try again the next month.
Thankyou so much for this info. I wish the clinic and hospital could have been more informative- here is always best for advice.
I have seen that many women don’t seem to be affected by it. I read somewhere that if it’s large and in the first trimester it can be more detrimental to the pregnancy which is why I was so worried. Obviously that info could be wrong.
Thankyou so much for the advice. We were told that some research suggests you’re more fertile after this so we planned to try again naturally but as you say, best to wait for a natural cycle first. Thankyou so much, and I wish you all the very best for the rest of your pregnancy 💜
I went through this in June - I opted to pass the pregnancy naturally and nothing happened - after 4 weeks (and another scan in between) still nothing. I went to my local EPU (as my clinic also just abandoned me) and I then opted for medical management which was pretty horrendous I'm not going to lie. It was very painful, much like induced labour. I then bled for about 2 weeks but my pregnancy tests were still very positive, so I went back for another scan and they saw 3cm of retained pregnancy tissue. They offered me a D&C, medical management again (hell no) or to wait until my next period to see if that gets rid of it.
I'm now at the tail end of a 3 week period and there is still the faintest of lines which I'm hoping will have gone in the next couple of days.
To say it's been traumatic would be an understatement. The only thing I can learn from this is that if I were to go through it again I would opt for a D&C straight away and get it over with.
Hi there, I’m so sorry about this and it does sound absolutely horrendous- as if you need that kind of ending to an already heartbreaking experience.
I’ve actually taken that medical management pill before too and I remember the pain being so horrific I was sick. That’s why I wanted to see if my body does it naturally but I’m not going to leave the wait too long. I’ll certainly consider what you’ve said. I’m just so sorry this happened. Do they have any idea why the body doesn’t let go of it or why some remains retained?
I'm not sure why the tissue was retained - I wonder if it just stuck deeper than maybe others? Yes it was a medicated FET although I know others who have just miscarried naturally. I think the issue with a medicated cycle is that your body takes a long time to get rid of the hormones, like progesterone so it can take a while.
Perhaps give it a week and if nothing has happened have a think about D&C?
Thankyou, I will do. I was only worried about D&C due to the risk of scar tissue but it seems from many pairs it’s not as bad as it seems or has been made out to be. I had medicated and was on 3x cyclogest daily and one lubion, so quite a bit. Only had some mild cramping on and off. Boobs are still sore though so feel like I still have lots of Hcg! 😓
I’m really sorry to hear this. As you can see from the responses, it’s an experience far too many of us suffer as you have previously. It’s a life cut entirely too short and for us left here, a lifetime of what ifs. As you know, it’s not something you “get over”, but your lives grow around the grief. Babies can’t replace babies, but I do hope you can get your happy ending. My miscarriage took about 7-10 days to pass. It started with light spotting and then turned to heavy bleeding and then spotting again. Everyone’s is different. Thinking of you x
Thankyou! Every word you said is so true and resonates so deeply with me. Thankyou for sharing. I’ve had the tiniest bit of spotting today and discharge / on and off mild cramps so we will see. I just want it over with already and it’s only been 2.5 days off the meds and already feels like a lifetime in this wait because of the very nature of it.
Thankyou for your kind words and wishing you all the best x
I’m so sorry you have to go through this. I’ve had a similar situation recently and it’s been the worst time of my life. Not only finding your baby has passed, along with it everything you imagined for the future but then you have to make horrible decisions about how to manage passing everything. I really struggled but ultimately opted for an MVA. I waited a week after stopping meds and I had started bleeding and having what felt like contractions but the EPU said that could continue for days or weeks and I just couldn’t live in limbo wondering when it would happen, how much worse it would become and if my body would pass everything. The MVA seemed to be less risky than a d&c due to ultrasound guidance and suction rather than scraping. Not sure if it’s gel or not to have another potential option to consider. I hope whatever you choose, it goes as well as such a traumatic thing can x
Thankyou for replying and I’m so sorry to what you’ve been though this too; it’s just not fair. MVA sounds like a good option if this doesn’t happen after a week or so. I wasn’t told about that but I’ll look into it. Thanks so much. Insoen the first 6.5 wks worrying about seeing blood and now it’s all I want to see as awful as that’s sounds as I just want it over with now, it’s heartbreaking waiting it out.
The women in this group are incredibly strong and I feel if you can get enough something like this, you can do anything!
I really appreciate the reply and advice/ sharing of experience. Wishing you all the best from here on in. X
MVA is a good option -just check what the pain relief is. You might be stronger than me but I struggled as the gas and air noted in the leaflet wasn't on the ward that day. Eventually I asked them to stop to go and grab it for me (before this I was given a stress ball in addition to the local anaesthetic. paracetamol and anti-inflammatory...).
I also highly recommend taking some co-codamol with you for after. The only options on my ward were paracetamol or morphine... It was worse than paracetamol bad but not opiate level!!
I had to wait a bit as needed an anti-D injection (I'm rhesus neg). So my initial paracetamol had totally worn off by then.
Don't let this put you off, I'd probably still go for that option again. But these are the things I wished I'd had a friend or older sister or whatever to tell me beforehand. All the bits sex ed and pregnancy leaflets leave out...
So sorry you're having to go through this. I think the most helpful thing to be told (other than the above) is that the pain really and truly does lessen and you do feel like a whole person again. I know that's hard to imagine right now, but it is true, I promise.
P.S. just saw your comment re: scar tissue -the pregnancy I had my MVA for stopped growing circa 6wk+5, and they were able to use a very tiny catheter, so very minimal risk of scarring (I think less than 5%).
No worries at all. Do feel free to ask questions -no one talks about this stuff and we really need them to!
I recommend a lot of shit TV and semi healthy takeaways/oven food. Gets the balance of not wanting to do anything but also not wanting to have to live with guilt right, or at least, it did for me. I ate a lot of Mexican food and a lot of Italian food...
It’s so true and there’s no support given apart from if you seek it out yourself like on here. Thankyou, yes we’ve had quite a few take outs but gone for healthier options with some nice Vietnamese etc.
I'm so sorry, this is a horrific situation to be in. For me, I finally got pregnant on our 4th transfer where two embryos had been transferred. I had no bleeding whatsoever although I was also on clexane as well as the progesterone meds.
We attended for my initial scan at 6+1 weeks to be told they could see the sac but couldn't see anything else and to go back in a week. My blood HCG was good (over 4500) so they thought I was just slightly behind in measurements.
The following week at 7+1 I had another scan at the clinic and was told it hadn't developed further and was referred to epu for miscarriage management and told to stop all meds.
My epu got us in 2 days later and, by some miracle, found a strong little heartbeat. They refused to call it and told me to get back on all meds, which I did. I had to go back again to epu the following week for monitoring on 21st December and that's when I had the news that the heartbeat had stopped and the pregnancy wouldn't be progressing further.
We were beyond devastated. To be told bad news, then get a miracle and have it taken away again was awful.
I came off all meds and miscarried naturally on Christmas day, so 4 days later. For me, it wasn't no more painful than a period, with a bit of cramping but not too bad, but the amount of blood coming out was a lot. I think I used about 10 pads that day, and then bled for about 9 days after., and following that it was about 6 weeks until I got a period again.
I had a follow up scan at epu on 3rd Jan and they confirmed all had passed. The clinic allowed us to try again with our final embryo from that batch at the end of march (negative). We then took a break and are now about to embark on another egg collection round..
One thing I will say, and I also brought this up with the epi clinic, they told me to read the stories on the miscarriage association website, don't do this. They are the extreme cases and scared me more than anything, I don't think they are representative of most people's experiences.
I hope that all goes well for you and wish you luck ok the future. Xx
Thankyou so much for replying and I’m so deeply sorry for what happened to you that’s just absolutely devastating and although no one’s fault it just feels so cruel. As you say, to get that miracle and then have it taken away like that is just awful. Had the clinic said anything about what they think may have happened? I didn’t do any PGTA testing as I only had the one day 5 embryo, did you have any of that done? It’s so hard as you feel like you want some answers but I guess we never really know what’s happened. I’m so sorry the final one was negative. We are going to go back to trying naturally for a bit and as I’ve had two miscarriages now and what i feel may have been a chemical on my fresh transfer in between, I’m going to get my uterine environment checked and maybe test for immune issues too as I have always suffered with bad allergies etc - if no success naturally by a certain point, we will also do another egg collection too. It’s such a rollercoaster. I’m wishing you all the very best for the future and hope you can have your rainbow baby soon! X
Thank you. I am sorry to hear about your miscarriages and chemical, this whole journey is so hard at times, but the rewards if it works will be worth it!
There wasn't really any answers as to why the miscarriage happened. On my last egg collection we made 7 embryos and are doing IVF due to male factors (failed vasectomy reversals) so we didn't do testing or anything and just expected it to work really.
My clinic are generally very good at letting me try anything I suggest, so for this next egg collection round we are doing PGTA testing and era testing. They are also going to prescribe me steroids as well as the blood thinners and do extra progesterone checks, although we did that previously and that was always fine.
I think sometimes it's luck to be honest. We know that the sperm wasn't the best quality, so my husband has been trying to improve that during the break. I have no children but my tests were ok but I've been taking extra supplements too and eating healthier etc. I think I went into it quite naive and just thought it would all work out, so I know what to expect this time and I think that will help too, less shocks and worry to an extent.
Also I am 40 next year so age isn't really on my side. We have been trying to conceive for 6 years, have had 2 failed vasectomy reversals and then moved onto IVF but got delayed because of the COVID shut down, but somehow we are remaining hopeful that it will work. Although I do now find a positive pregnancy test is more stress inducing than a negative as at least with that it's certain! Xx
That’s so true about the positive tests! And I think that unfortunately it will be that way after losses.
I’m exactly the same as you, 40 next year so that’s why i feel so panicked, although after all the work I did on egg quality (diet, acupuncture etc) I did see my hormones and levels in a better place at 39 than they were at 37/38 so you can certainly improve on that side of things.
It’s just the hardest when you get so close and then it gets taken away!
It sounds like your clinic are very supportive. Mine would always just say ‘it’s not standard practice’ when I’d suggest things. They didn’t actually seem very knowledgeable to be honest and I wouldn’t do it with them again. They also closed at weekends and shut at 4pm and the treatments were basic as in they rarely monitored anything including my hormones once on meds. They’ve never checked my oestrogen levels once in two cycles! It’s just not good enough. So I’ll certainly be moving on.
Sounds like you have a good solid protocol for next time and I wish you all the very best with it! I believe you will get there, it’s just so hard to know how long each persons journey will be 💜
I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I also had a miscarriage at about 8 weeks. It happened a week after I went for my week 7 ultrasound and they told me there was "no heartbeat" and little growth and that this was going to be a miscarriage. I chose to wait and during that week I hoped that somehow they were wrong. It's so cruel when this happens because I think that as women we bond right away when we find out we're pregnant and have all these hopes and dreams for our future baby. As for the actual miscarriage experience - it was similar to having a heavy period but with much stronger cramps. I had the option to get PGT testing done afterwards but chose not to because I thought what's the point of doing this? One week later I had to come in so the doctor could check my HCG levels and do an ultrasound to make sure there was nothing retained of the pregnancy that needed to be removed. Sending you strength and love. Hopefully you have close friends and /or family that you can learn on for support. Take care of yourself.
Thankyou so much for replying and I’m so sorry you’ve been through this. Was it your clinic who offered to test it? I known what you mean- what’s the point now!
I just hope it can all be over with soon as it’s such an exhausting and difficult time.
I really wish you all the very best with everything to come 💜
Yes my doctor from the clinic told me that if I wanted to test the tissue to see if the embryo was chromosomally normal- she could send me home with a vial. Part of me was in denial and just heartbroken so I thought what's the point. It's assumed that the majority of miscarriages occur because the embryo is not normal and wouldn't survive. It was comforting to me to read a recent study that showed fetal DNA (whether it's from a child you gave birth to or one you miscarried) stays with mom for the rest of her life. To know that a part of my baby that was never meant to be stays with me was a comfort.
It’s so sad. I have also read that many early losses can also be the cause of uterine environment and underlying silent infections which is always worrying as you wouldn’t necessarily have any symptoms. A fertility expert I was working with said that the embryo goes through some markedly rapid and important changes and apparently does so around the 6wk mark where the heartbeat needs to switch on (can do before this) and the placenta should ‘come online’ so to speak! I guess there’s always just so many things that need to line up for a pregnancy to develop (just like in IVF cycles) that’s what makes this so hard, the journey you’ve already been on just to get the positive!
Really appreciate you sharing your journey with me and I really wish you all the very best x
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