Why I can't be optimistic or at least cautiously optimistic?

[Oxford_1985]

After some tests where I saw a progressive line, we got the official confirmation at our beta last Friday: I'm pregnant. Five weeks.

And still, my brain doesn't let me stay calm. My hCG level was 1001 mlU/ml (beta done two weeks after transfer). Today (2 weeks+4 days), I was bleeding a bit, and I lost my nerves.

First, the transfer was with a frozen euploid of 5 days. I did today another digital test, and I could read: pregnant. 2-3 weeks. Why is not 3+ if I'm five weeks pregnant?

I know friends who had babies, and they enjoyed their pregnancy. Why can't I be like them?

After four failed transfers, I'm susceptible to this topic, and I know until I won't see my baby's face, I won't be calm...

[Millbanks]

Firstly congratulations!

Secondly, don't trust the digital tests - you have a good BETA so don't look at those. They are notorious for stressing people out!!

Thirdly, it is so hard after failed transfers to be excited - but as your pregnancy progresses I promise you will. You will start to believe it and as you have scans and see your baby you will start to allow yourself a bit of hope.

xx

[Oxford_1985 in reply to Millbanks]

Thanks Millbanks for your words. Indeed, you are right: after four failed transfer is hard to be excited. Me and my husband we are like, "ok, what's next?" everytime I spot a bit or I'm not feeling good. We just want some good news... :/

[Millbanks in reply to Oxford_1985]

I understand how you feel.

Our 6th transfer was the one that worked - I didn't fully believe there was a baby in there until I started to feel kicks at 20 weeks. Every time I went for a scan I just assumed there would be nothing in there. Everytime I saw something I cried.

Fertility issues rob you of the joy of being pregnant to start with because there are so many worries - but it does get easier.

I had a bleed at 17 weeks (lasted for 3 weeks) and I was convinced it was over - your mind just goes down that road straight away.

xx

[Oxford_1985 in reply to Millbanks]

Exactly... IVF gave me the hopes to be mother but at the same time it robs you the joy of being pregnant. Hope to update you over time with good news. Thanks xx

[Ginbaby]

I done them tests up until I was 6 weeks and they were still showing 2-3 weeks. So I stopped and booked in for a private scan and got to see a heartbeat. I’ve been bleeding pretty much since my OTD and baby is fine. I had my viability scan with the clinic today and it’s doubled in size and has a heartbeat of 156. Don’t get me wrong my anxiety is through the roof as I keep bleeding but everything is showing fine. This was my 5th transfer and 1st ever BFP. xx

[Oxford_1985 in reply to Ginbaby]

Baby is fine, and that's the important! Congrats 🥰 But yeah... our anxiety is through the roof when I was bleeding, during the test, during the ultrasound... Next week I've booked another ultrasound so I expect to see the heartbeat 🤞