Unable to have a second baby (6 egg collections - no blastocyst)

[JPxx]

I am looking for some support from anyone that has been or is in the same situation I am in as I am really struggling.

We are so blessed to have a daughter. She was ICSI after 3 eggs collections and only one blastocyst make, and that is her. A true miracle.

I have just had 6 egg collections, (back to back, no break) and we have not made one blastocyst.

We are male factor, using surgically removed sperm due to high DNA frag but also my AMH is 3, so I only get 3-4 eggs per round.

This last 8 months have been exhausting. I am thinking it just might not be possible to make another. We have spent nearly £70k but the thought of stopping devastates me.

Many would say, at least you have one, which I completely understand but it doesn't stop the pain for wanting a sibling for my little girl.

Has anyone done so many rounds and also had to stop?

Any advise on how to cope?

Should I not give up hope and kept trying?

Heart is breaking with the constant negative news and failed rounds, with nothing to transfer.

[JA-fnuk Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hope you get some replies to your post Just to say thinking of you- hope you have people around you for support while you make your difficult decision about what to do next Take a look at our website fertilitynetworkuk.org [main menu click Access Support ] for support during your fertility journey

Take care of yourself

Janet -Partner

[Nenad]

hi there, I’m not sure how old you are but would it make sense for you to take a little break before trying again? Back to back collections won’t yield drastically better results so it would be a good opportunity for you to give your body a break. Also my fertility doctor always tells me that you’re more fertile after an egg collection. Of course I don’t know your circumstances but thought I would share what I was told. I’d recommend giving your body a break for 2-3 months before deciding to go for another round x

[Orangeflowers]

Hello, I thought I'd reply as I have a similar experience to yours. I have a daughter and am trying for a sibling without success yet. I have done 6 fresh rounds in just over a year -all BFN, but I do have 2 frozen blastocysts.

I have highish AMH and a good follicle count for my age, so thought it might just be a numbers game and if I kept going I might be just in time. I don't think I'll collect any more now and will focus on implantation tests prior to transferring my final two.

I know it's time to stop as I struggle to produce blastocysts now. Also I read stats that showed that by 43, you need to test 17 blastocysts of suitable quality by biopsy to have one normal, which would have a 1 in 3 chance of implantation. HEFA also indicates chances are less than 5% for my age, though my clinic gave me slightly higher.

I have some hope that if it doesn't work I might try donor eggs.

I'm not sure how old you are, but if you are younger you might have more chance with your eggs. It is hard knowing when to stop. I normally work hard at something and eventually succeed, but we have little control over all this.

Maybe seek a second clinical opinion.

Hoping you find a way through x

[JPxx in reply to Orangeflowers]

Thank you for comment and sharing your situation, sending lots of love your way as well. It is tough.

I am 37, my AMH is 3, so I am only getting 3-4 eggs per round. They are often mature but they just dont make it past day 3, which is the sperm I am told. We have surgically removed sperm, but only 3 vials left, so maybe that will make us stop as I dont think my husband can have another retrieval. We have tested the surgically removed sperm and the DNA frag results are really good, so it is just luck in the lab selecting the best sperm to put in the egg.

I think a second opinion might be needed. Hard to start somewhere else, but a consultation cant harm.

Still cant decided if to take a break, think it is my personality that keeps pushing to do round after round. When maybe I need to listen to the toll it is taking on my body.

Good luck with your two frozen, I am assuming they have tested them and they are good?

many thanks again.

[C-a-t-m-u-m]

I’m so sorry to read your story, you are one very strong special lady ❤️❤️

Similar situation trying for a sibling after our IVF miracle little boy and it’s just not happening. I also feel heartbroken at the moment.

I’ve decided to do some counselling through my clinic.

Sending you a big hug ❤️ and thinking of you.

[JPxx in reply to C-a-t-m-u-m]

Thank you for your message, sorry to hear you are in the same situation, I hope you find some comfort in that you are not alone in this. xx

[Ivfgotadream]

so sorry - I did 5 almost back to back and 3 egg collections to give my eldest a sibling

In terms of the male factor what medication is your partner on to help with this? X

[JPxx in reply to Ivfgotadream]

We use surgically removed sperm, because he has very very high DNA fragmentation. Our urologist believe it gets damaged on its way out naturally and the surgically removed sperm we have tested and the results are good.

However the lab select one sperm by eye, therefore they could just be picking the wrong one, or my egg quality is poor. (37 years old) Lab say my eggs look fine though. But something is going on, as we are not making any Blasts.

[McQueeny]

I’m so sorry you’re in this position. It’s horrible. And people saying ‘well you’ve already got one’ don’t really get it - having one is amazing, but it doesn’t make the failures less painful…. Desperately wanting another child doesn’t mean you love your ‘one’ any less!

Our journey has not been quite as gruelling. Our son is the result of 2 egg collections and 3 transfers - when we went to try for a sibling we had 2 more collections and 6 transfers, and no baby.

I then decided I had one more egg collection in me - it’s very personal, only you can know where your limits are, physical, emotional, financial. You’re an absolute hero for going through so many. For us, if a 5th collection wouldn’t give us anything, then it’s either move to donors or stop. So we changed clinics (went abroad - to feel we are doing something different, rather than because there was anything wrong with the clinic we were with) - took a couple of months off treatment, made sure hubby was on the right supplements too, took a breather and went again.

We were incredibly lucky and we got our BFP (currently 16 weeks 🤞).

I do agree that giving yourself a break might be a good idea…. Back to backs are so tough on your body.

Sending you strength, you’ll figure out what’s right for you 💪 x

[JPxx in reply to McQueeny]

Than you for sharing your journey and providing the hope! Well done you for all your efforts and sending a lot of love during your pregnancy.

I think a second opinion is wise, I am so stuck with our clinic as know them so well and they know me and I feel it is a mission moving but a consultation else where could help a lot.

thank you

[Siba12]

Hi,

I had my son 2 years ago via ICSI male factor issue aswell.

I have been through 2 failed rounds this year and am on my 2 week wait window currently on my third round .

I completely understand that you want to give your child a sibling and I think that is enough to keep going. Well for me it was and fingers cross round 3 is a success!

[JPxx in reply to Siba12]

Everything crossed for you!!

I really hope you get there, I ended up having 10 collections last year and beginning of this year.

I prob should have in hindsight given my body a break in between each collection, but when no embryos were made, I kept on doing them back to back.

On my last collection, which I had said would be my last go, for mental and financial reasons, we used fresh sperm with Zymot and then PISCI, followed by usual Isci ivf. I got one embryo that I genetically tested and it was a good one.

Transferred on a frozen round, medication free.

I am currently 20 weeks. With everything crossed.

An actual miracle.

If I can get there, you can!!!

[Vassi in reply to JPxx]

That's so wonderful congratulations! I'm glad I read til the end. Your post is exactly how I'm feeling and where I am at right now its so hard to keep going. You are one strong lady and this gives me some hope. All the best with your pregnancy ❤️

[JPxx in reply to Vassi]

It is so so so hard. All I can offer is hope and strength. I tried to keep hope that if it had worked before it will work again, it might just take a lot of time, heartache and unfortunately money.

Push your clinic to provide you with more tests, different approaches. I didn't take no for an answer. It only takes one to work!

I struggled to keep positive and actually decided the best approach for me mentally was to just ride with it and not get my hopes up. People say be positive but I had lost all of that. I expected negative results to protect myself.

Wishing you so much luck and sending so much strength.

[Vassi in reply to JPxx]

Thank you for your kind words and advice. I'm on cycle 10 and as hard as it is to keep going, in the end I want to know I did everything I could. I'm so happy it worked for you, its so much to go through but it makes it all worth it in the end.