First cycle. What a rollercoaster. How do you do you cope with the highs and lows?

[Aansey]

This is our first round of IVF and we are already learning so much. The first thing is how absolutely amazing this community is, we have so much admiration for the resilience and strength of everyone going through fertility treatments.

It’s been a rollercoaster. Stimulation went well and we collected 7 eggs last week, 5 of these fertilised normally and were all doing well at day 3. Transfer went ahead on day 5 but we were disappointed that it was a low grade blastocyst and that the other 4’s progression had slowed. On day 6 we found out that there were none suitable for freezing.

This was such a blow. I’m so pleased we were able to transfer but it is so hard to hold on to hope knowing that the other embryos didn’t develop and so this one might not either.

How do you manage these highs and lows?

How do you cope with update phone calls during working hours?

What advice would you offer to someone at the beginning of their IVF journey?

[Daffodils1]

A great question, I wish after 9 years I could give you some great insight but I’m not sure I’ve got it figured out. It is still take each day one at a time. When / If you get knocked down, take time before getting back up again.

The strength everyone in this community finds is amazing.

Be kind to yourself, be selfish if you need to.

[Minminminminh]

Congratulations on your transfer, that is a huge win and I hope you find your BFP. from my own experiences, this is what I have learnt. Don’t keep any pregnancy tests in the house during TWW!! Very easy to spiral and test everyday but not feel better. Wait until OTD. Book staycation, go out with friends, start new series - anything to distract you. Second thing, don’t get too hung up on embryo quality- I’ve found poor quality has resulted in BFP and sometimes good quality in BFN. Lastly, no IVF cycles are the same. I’ve had no blastocysts in one round and in another I’ve had one to freeze. But I’m hoping this cycle is successful for you. All the best on this tough journey xx

[StarsAllAround]

1. Always wait till OTD, testing early is inaccurate and causes sooo much anxiety.

2. Stay away from Google it is not your friend and will only send down a rabbit hole of anxiety.

3. Communicate with your partner, don't bottle up your feelings.

4. Find things to occupy your mind while waiting for updates, like binge watching something, reading something, trying a new hobby.

5. Give yourself little treats for getting through each stage of treatment.

6. Plan nice things to do with your partner, like a day trip, meal out, cinema etc.

7. If your not telling people you are going through IVF try not to isolate yourself you can still go out with friends and family.

8. Keep living your normal life, don't let IVF consume you.

9. Don't be hard on yourself for how you feel. Going through IVF is not easy anyone who takes on this journey is an amazingly strong woman always remember that ❤️

10. And finally this community is here for you so post anything anytime someone will respond.

It took me a few cycles to work out most of the above. Good luck on your journey x

[Woody87]

Hi Aansey. I think you got it spot on there with the rollercoaster - that’s exactly what it is. I’ve found that anything I think of as a certain often becomes the opposite!

I’m on my first round too, with frozen embryo transfer taking place today, after what feels like the longest rollercoaster already, and I guess it’s only just beginning. Try not to overthink - Although it’s inevitable it takes up your whole brain continuously

Sending light and love to you,

[Aansey]

Thank you all for these words of wisdom. Wishing you all lots of luck on your journeys. ❤️

[Noahsmummy2018]

All I can say is take each step at a time. And each cycle at a time as they're all different. This is my 8th cycle - 3rd cycle I had a successful pregnancy and have a 4 year old son. It doesn’t get any easier with each cycle, but you learn much more about the process so it doesn't seem so confusing in some ways - in some ways though I guess it does become more confusing because alot of it is trial and error and learning from previous attempts. The 2ww is the hardest part for me every time personally and I don't feel that it ever gets easier!

Definitely don't worry so much about the quality of embryos - my little boy was a lower grade and is living proof that it can happen. I also was pregnant with a low grade embryo last year which unfortunately ended in a chemical pregnancy. Currently in the 2ww with two lower grade embryos, test date is Tuesday and I've had mild cramps, some spotting yesterday and itchy nipples 🤯😂 each cycle is very different I've never had spotting before or the itching 😅

[Aansey in reply to Noahsmummy2018]

All the best for your OTD! ❤️

[Kismet_x]

This might be a weird thing to say but don't put your whole heart into this and make sure you have other things going on in your life as you don't want the ivf journey to consume either of you. Basically don't forget to have fun in life and what ever will be will be. Thats how I handled it x