ectopic instead of a miscarriage

[Rainbowretrieval]

Hi guys. After a rising hcg and investigations all week for what I thought was a miscarriage, and a subsequent admission to A&E Saturday night, it was finally confirmed yesterday I had an ectopic pregnancy after my first ever ivf transfer (FET). It was in my tubes, and as it turns out was partially stuck to an ovary. One of my tubes and part of an ovary has been taken away. So currently sitting at 3am wide awake in my hospital bed. Feeling so upset as to how the hell this could have happened, probably in the angry ‘why me’ phase. Feeling a tad defeated and wondering why I put my body through this new trauma. However, I am trying not to dwell on this unhealthy space and instead thinking of the small wins:

I was lucky enough to get pregnant, albeit in the wrong place

Surely the chances of another ectopic are lower as I now only have one tube

The reality is I wouldn’t have been using that tube anyway, it’s ivf or bust now for me due to my age

I can do an early reassurance scan if I miraculously ever get pregnant again because of this new history

I am fortunate to have other embryos in storage, my heart goes out to ladies having ectopics without that luxury

There doesn’t appear to be damage during the surgery to other areas and my waterworks are ok

I feel alright-ish so might be able to go home in the morning

I’m still alive

We all have to cling on to the small wins at the moment, right. Any positive post ectopic stories are welcome! Xxx

[Solly-44]

oh love, I’m so sorry. What a cruel situation to be in, sending you the biggest hug. Xx

[butterfliez]

Hi I am so sorry for what your going through. sending you strength, it is good to focus on those points you've listed as that will help , but also allow your self time to take everything in and grieve your loss. wish you all the best with your recovery take care xx

[ClaireB24]

I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this, it is totally heartbreaking seeing those 2 lines only for it to end that way. I had an ectopic with my second embryo transfer. I’m currently 38 weeks pregnant after transfer no 4, so it absolutely can happen. Give yourself some time to recover and I wish you so much luck for the future xxx

[AuroraXen]

I'm in awe of you, reading this. You must be very strong to think so clearly and positively in thr midst of this awful time. You've been really unlucky, I'm really sorry 😞 You make excellent points here though sweetheart, and the frosties are definitely a cause for optimism. Take a bit of time if you need it, to process this loss xxx

[Hidden]

So sorry to read this, I am so pleased you finally have some closure with all the confusion that has ensued but also so sorry for you that it's ended up like it has. Hope you heal quickly physically so you can start to heal mentally and get geared up for the next transfer. You are doing brilliantly with your positivity - sending hugs xx

[TexasRose210]

I’m so sorry for this terrible event to happen to you

[DG2022]

so sorry this has happened to you. It happened to me a couple of weeks ago. I find it bizarre it can happen in ivf?! Mine was a natural pregnancy and was advised I must have ivf next to avoid another ectopic but it can still happen obviously. It’s taken me a couple of weeks to fully recover post surgery. It’s sore absolutely don’t do what I did and attempt House work however light 🤦‍♀️ xx

[Rainbowretrieval in reply to DG2022]

So sorry youve had similar experiences it’s an absolute shock isn’t it. I have done some housework when I got in as the place was a mess 😪 wish I hadn’t though as tummy feels very tight. Apparently its more common in ivf so I wouldn’t be swayed by whoever advised that and do what you instinctively feel is right. Did you have any of your tubes taken if you don’t mind me asking? I’ve heard of ectopics before but not ones where you end up with it on your bloody ovary like I did, so can only think the placement must have been off kilter in some way when it was done. I feel bad saying it to the clinic but I don’t want the same lady doing my transfer next time. I know it’s probably totally irrational and not even connected but I am terrified of it not being done right next time and putting my health at risk again, I don’t want to put my remaining intact ovary in any kind of jeopardy

[DG2022 in reply to Rainbowretrieval]

I had my right tube taken but not my ovary. It’s rarer to be at the ovary so you were unlucky in that respect. However on a positive like you said - have reduced your chances of it happening on the right side at least. How many embryos do you have in storage? Im seeing a miscarriage specialist end of March so will ask about trying naturally and risk of further ectopic. Hope you’re feeling a little less sore today - the trapped gas at the shoulder pain is so rubbish Xx

[Rainbowretrieval in reply to DG2022]

I have 8 in the freezer so I know I’m very fortunate (but also there are no guarantees) my shoulder pain has disappeared now but yes that’s a random one you don’t expect isn’t it! I am a wee bit less tender today but very bloated. That’s interesting regards a miscarriage specialist I haven’t heard of that, might look into that…might give some pointers/ reassurance! X

[DG2022 in reply to Rainbowretrieval]

that’s a nice amount left Xx

[Twiglet2]

I’m so so sorry you are so brave! Sending love xx 💜

[Kmcdon]

Sending love, it sounds like you have been through such a tough time. I’m so impressed that you are able to think of some positives. I completely get it about next transfer, I would definitely not want the same person! It is great you have some frozen embryos waiting for you when you are ready. Not sure if it helps but my sister had an ectopic pregnancy and had a tube removed, she was able to get pregnant not that long after, the result being my lovely nephew. Hope that gives you some reassurance. Xx

[Rainbowretrieval in reply to Kmcdon]

Thanks so much for your good news story 😊 let’s see what the next couple of months bring x

[Kmcdon in reply to Rainbowretrieval]

Glad it helped. I'll be thinking of you. Xx