Fertility funding

[SR90]

Hi, has anyone got any advice regarding fertility funding/packages etc?

A little history... We took out a package with a well known company for a 2 cycle multi cycle but unfortunately both cycles failed. Although being told my consultant ‘not to worry about qualifying for the refund package, they don’t review your history’, we are now being told because we’ve had failed treatment in the past and have low sperm and amh, that we don’t qualify for the refund package. Leaving me to only purpose the multi cycle again and potentially waste another large sum of money if these also fail (we have had zero fertilisation both times so don’t even get to embryo stage!).

From start to finish I have felt like this is a money making process and absolutely no thought about the patients and the emotional rollercoaster. We have even been told by our clinic that price matching for medication is down to the judgement of the clinic manager. So basically if you’ve not spent a substantial amount of money with them, they probably won’t price match anything.

Can anyone tell me of some good stories because I’m losing faith here! 🙈

[AuroraXen]

I don't have good stories to share but wanted to say I feel your pain! The money involved in the IVF game is shocking. It's very very hard. I've also used the 2 cycle deals - I knew we wouldn't be eligible for any 'no baby refunds' but it still worked out considerably cheaper. Like 3800 for one ICSI cycle, without meds and hfea fees etc. Whereas doing a round solo direct with the clinic was 6 thousand and something for the same. So I do think it's worth it, but that must've been a nasty shock , if you thought you were eligible for the guarantee 😢😢. This is the awful thing about doing IVF privately... apart from gambling, in the traditional sense nowhere, nowhere else can you put in such huge sums of money with a good chance of walking away with nothing. Zero. With your hard-earned (or borrowed!) money literally going down the toilet. It's heartbreaking and seems so very unfair. But we do it, as long as we can beg borrow or steal because... the alternatives are also so hard 😫. For some, IVF is the only possible route to a pregnancy. For others, like us, we feel it's a better shot than just trying naturally. If IVF works for you, I'm sure everyone would say it was worth every penny and all the pain and humiliation and loneliness. But when it doesn't... well. It really sucks 😔😔💔 xxx

[SR90 in reply to AuroraXen]

Thanks for your reply huni. I think that’s half my problem (or more!).. they rinse us on the ‘hope’ of getting what we want, it’s torture! I’d spend every penny I had and more if I knew it would be the ending I want.Thank you for not making me feel like I was insane 🤦🏻‍♀️ x

[Ivfgotadream]

I was turned down for the refund package - not due to previous failed rounds but due to multiple miscarriages etc which made me a bad bet I guess.

Was there a reason why you didnt purchase the refund package first instead of the 2 cycle? I think a lot of times it’s just down to just not knowing? I admit I was pretty naïve about the whole thing really and did 2 individual rounds and 3 transfers which failed and then purchased a 3 cycle package of natural modified IVF. In total we’ve spent £35k and I wish we’d just done the 3 cycle Nat mod first - but no one - not the doctors or the clinic can predict how you are going to respond. The first cycle is often seen as a bit of a test cycle (although they aren’t going to admit that when you are paying £6K plus for what is effectively a trial run) and if it goes badly they don’t usually expect the second cycle goes the same way?

Has your clinic suggested trying something new if you went again? Did they offer any refund on what you have already paid since you didn’t make it to transfer? To be honest with 2 rounds of zero fertilisation I’d probably look at another clinic?

[Dreamscometrue1]

I totally agree, the clinics don’t seem to see you as a person they just see you as someone how is so desperate to make their dream come true that they will do anything. I’m starting to question some of the things my clinic is saying to me and wonder if it’s really needed.

[SR90]

To be honest, I was naive like you say. We were told there would be no actual reason why we wouldn’t manage to conceive relatively quickly because although my OH has low sperm and I have slightly low Amh, they are still both there And we have no other medical history. Obviously nothing is guaranteed and we knew that but maybe a little over optimistic because in 2 cycles... there’s all those frozen ones too right? So lots of chances.At no point did it ever cross my mind that we wouldn’t get any at all.

The first round they put down to wrong medication because I got a lot of eggs but poor quality. The second round they were even more shocked it happened and said the sperm sample was a lot worse that time but my eggs were much better! So in theory... third time lucky right 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️!

They have suggested using the egg activation next time. I was/am really frustrated actually that I wasted both rounds and with no mention of any refund. With the package company, as soon as egg collection has been done, 1 cycle is over.

I wondered about the clinic but I guess it’s the unknown with every clinic.

My clinic has some of the best results and things in the area and is no where near the cheapest and I just never know what’s best to do 🙈. They did say if it fails again we may have to look at sperm donors as they could be the main reason it isn’t working, (again, unknown really).