Conceiving at 40 - Any tips?

[luckysb]

What are the chances of conceiving at 40? we've been trying for 7 months and I don't think we're handling things very well. I just feel down all the time and its a lot of pressure on our relationship. Does anyone have any tips on how to cope with the disappointment?

[jengi]

Oh i wish i did. It is really tough coping with that disappointment every month. Keep talking and communicating with each other. You could try some fertility acupuncture acupuncture.org.uk/ Wishing you every success. I have a friend who conceived naturally for both her pregnancies and gave birth at 41 and 44. So don't give up hope. You could also explore the book "its starts with an egg", there is some good advice in there. Wishing you every success XX

[luckysb in reply to jengi]

Thank you Jengi for your reply. It's really helpful to hear that you have friends who were successful. I've read the 'it starts with the egg' it's a really helpful read. I do now rattle because I'm taking all the supplements it suggests I'll have a look into the acupuncture. Thank you again xx

[Maisie234]

Have you both been tested for any issues? I'd say that if they came back ok, then there's no reason why you couldn't conceive naturally. I've friends who have. I started at 39 and IVF at 41 by then we discovered we had a male factor issue as well as my age so it was even more difficult.

As for coping, gosh it's so difficult. If you both are good at talking then it's half the battle. My other half sticks his head in the sand, which has been hard. My friends have helped immensely, and if you don't tell them, speak to someone else. Don't let it build up. Good luck x

[luckysb in reply to Maisie234]

Ah thank you for your reply and for your luck

I've have my tests done, I have a fibroid but they said that it isn't near the lining - so hopefully that won't be an issue. My partner has an appointment to drop his sample off on Friday. Fingers crossed that all comes back ok. I think it will help when we have all the information.

So far I haven't told many people, other than my partner the only person that knows is my Mum. I've been a bit worried about telling friends just in case they keep asking so I've been hiding all the worries a lot. Thank you for your advice, I probably should open up a bit more x

[Ketkoot]

Hi. My OH was finally ready to try for a baby when I hit 40! Initially it was fun, like when we first got together (over 17 years ago!) and we were ‘trying’ all the time. I got pregnant within 7 months, not bad considering my age but sadly MC after 6 weeks. Fast forward that first year and 3 MC later we were referred for IVF. All our tests are fine, we were added to the unexplained group except for my age. Unfortunately as soon as u hit 40 we get written off!

I am currently 5 weeks 3 days pregnant, we take each day as it comes and are not counting on anything.

If anything this process has brought us more together. Like most males he isn’t good at talking but I think seeing me inject myself daily and stick things where they shouldn’t 🙈has made him see me in a different light.

Don’t let ur age stop u from trying but so far we r glad of the little extra help IVF has given us. Please PM if you need any help. X

[luckysb in reply to Ketkoot]

oh gosh it sounds like you've been on such a journey. I'm sending all my best wishes for this pregnancy.

It's great to hear that you are closer now - that really gives me hope. I think I need to mend some bridges with my partner, maybe I'm putting too much pressure on him at certain times. He's finding it difficult seeing me upset and just wants me to be my old self but I've been stuck in a worry loop.

Thank you again for sharing your hope and for the offer of help, you've really helped already x

[Hidden]

I started ttc at 37 I have 2 children already but my fiancé has no kids. We had 3 mmc at 12/13w which was devastating we had mc tests then fertility tests nothing wrong except low amh. We were told to just keep trying as that’s our best chance as ivf would be donor egg.

So that was nov 19 in Dec we had a chemical pregnancy then again in March by this time I had to emotionally move on. Friday I got a bfp I’m 40 now, I’m pretty terrified it’ll end in another mc but I have to have hope it’s the one.

[luckysb in reply to Hidden]

Congratulations on your bfp - I'm sending you all my best wishes.

I'm so sorry you've have so much pain. You've been so strong and I hope you have good news in the next few months x

[Hidden in reply to luckysb]

Thank you and good luck with your journey x