Heartbroken : Today was supposed to be... - Fertility Network UK

Fertility Network UK
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Today was supposed to be my transfer day for my first FET. We got the call this morning that our 1 frostie didn’t survive. We are completely heartbroken and devastated. I don’t know what to do with myself. I guess I’m looking for a little support from people who understand how I might be feeling xx

86 Replies

Oh lovely I’m so sorry to see this. I can only imagine how devastated you feel right now and I just wanted to send you big hug xxx

Thank you so much x I definitely needed a hug x

Oh Pinksunshine I can only imagine how devastated you are feeling! Its horribly cruel to be expecting to transfer then to be given this news, my heart goes out to you!! Sending massive hugs.xx

Thank you so much x cruel is exactly how it feels x thank you for the much needed hug xx

I'm so sorry lovely, sending hugs xoxo

Thank you for your kindness and hug xx

So sorry lovely. Sending love and hugs to you ❤️

Thank you so much xx

So sorry to hear this. Sending love & healing thoughts ❤️

You’re very kind x thank you x

I am so sorry to hear this. Sending you lots of hugs. Xx

Thank you for your kindness x

So sorry to hear that this has happened..sending you a virtual hug 🤗 ❤️Xxx

Thank you x I really need hugs xx

I’m so sorry to hear that lovely, it’s heartbreaking I know... we had one that didn’t survive the thawing process and it was just unreal, they always say the chances are really small for this to happen but it seems that it does happen way to often.... I’m really sorry and sending you loads of love and hugs! Just give yourself time to heal... 😘 xxx

Thank you x it’s just totally heartbreaking x we are going to give ourselves some time to regroup and plan our next steps x I really appreciate your support xx

I'm so sorry to hear this. I know exactly how you feel. We didn't make it to transfer on our first round. Our egg stopped developing and wasnt suitable and we had nothing to freeze. It's so awful when you build everything up just to have it all stop.

I know you must feel devastated right now. Try to look after yourself and don't blame yourself (I couldn't help this and it sucks). It will take time but you will get there x

Thank you so much xx

So sorry! Sending you hugs and healing thoughts xxx

You’re very kind thank you xx


I am so sorry to hear this. We had our FET on Monday and my worst fear was that the embryo wouldn’t survive the thaw so I can completely understand how you must be feeling, it must be completely devastating and I really feel for you! Sending lots of love to you xx

Pinksunshine39 in reply to Hidden

Thank you xx

So sorry to hear this. This is devastating. :( :( :( Thinking of you and sending lots of love. xxxx

Thank you so much for your support x

I’m so sorry to hear this. I can only think this wasn’t your time yet, but it will come! Sending you a big hug x

Thank you that means a lot x

Just wanted to say how sorry I am and how crap it all is :( nothing will really make you fell better at the moment, just remember to be kind to yourself, i have found hibernating for a few days in pjs and box sets has all that i can manage when similar has happened to me. Big hugs xxx

Thank you x you are all so lovely x

I’m really sorry, honestly I’m heartbroken for you, I really don’t know why we have to go through so much... I’m praying for you and sending lots of love ❤️

Thank you ❤️xx

Oh lovely, I’m so so sorry to hear this. Sending lots of love 💕 Rest up and look after yourself xxx

Thank you ❤️x

I’m so sorry, that’s heartbreaking. I am having my fet on Tuesday and this is my biggest worry. I can only imagine - sending you lots of love and strength x

Thank you x wishing you lots and lots of luck x I will have everything crossed for you xx

Oh thank you, that’s really kind of you. This isn’t the end of your journey, take care of yourself x

I am sorry to hear that you frostie didn’t survive😞

We were in similar situation me and my husband went through cycle of ivf and it had to be postponed to fet transfer due to high risk of OHSS, we only had one embryo from that cycle, going though all scans and prep for fet we had a phone call on the day of transfer that the only one embryo we had did not survive and we were already on our way to the clinic ! It’s a absolutely devastating, i can only suggest PGD next cycle, but it’s expensive and it may come back that non of the embryos are viable.

However for us it didn’t go well either and we our on a way to have fet donor embryo transfer.

Sending big hugs xx

Thank you so much for your reply x those are things we definitely need to consider for our next cycle x

oh! So sorry , i feel your pain and disappointment, sending you some hug and hope🤗🤗🤗🤗❤❤❤❤

Pinksunshine39 in reply to 12356

Thank you ❤️xx

You are coming to the right place... so many ladies here know exactly how you are feeling. My first (and only, so far) ivf cycle did not result in a transfer. So much to go through, so much emotional investment and it is traumatic when a cycle ends in this way. It feels so cruel and so unfair.

It takes time but you will begin to feel more like yourself again. Be patient, cry and take the time to process it all. You will come out stronger. ... Take care x x x

Thank you so much x

I know exactly how you feel as 2 of our blasts didn’t survive the thaw! They had told us going into the FET that the blasts were great and quality and 95% of blasts/embryos survive the thaw so kept stressing that this was incredibly rare. It was heartbreaking receiving the call on the way to the hospital. Felt so unfair after preparing mentally and physically for long for it to end at the thawing stage. Please look after yourself.. things will get better in time.x

This is so how I feel! Thank you x it feels better knowing I’m not alone x

So sorry to hear this sending love ❤️ xxx

Thank you ❤️x

I am so sorry hun I cannot imagine how devastating this is for you I am sending you the biggest hugs on ur way

Thank you x gratefully received xx

So sorry, this is heartbreaking in an already tough journey. Don’t give up, it will happen one day xx

Thank you for your kind words xx


I am sorry to hear that this has happened to you, I had the same experience last year, it is so difficult :( I was so angry and so devastated, all that preparation, taking all the meds etc and then that dreadful phone call 😒

Take care of yourself and try to concentrate on the future, I know not that easy at the moment ... but you will be able to move on and soldier on x

This process is so very hard, I felt that I can not do it any longer many times and I am still here (have been doing it for 4 years now).

Wish you all the best,

A x

I’m sorry you have experienced this too x it’s truly heartbreaking x thank you for your support x

I’m so sorry xx

Thank you ❤️x

I'm so sorry. X wish I could say something to make it all better but I cant. Please know that you are in my thoughts. X

Thank you so much xx

I’ve not been in this position but I just wanted to send a massive hug x

Thank you ❤️xx

Dear Pinksunshine...I am so sorry that your hopes were dashed this round. Cry and grieve and feel the pain and then let it go...please don't give up hope. Are you in a position to try again? If so, what would you do differently? How can you help your eggs and sperm be even better? I find it so comforting to concentrate on what I can control, and try to let go of what I can't. Sending a huge hug through cyberspace as you come to terms with this news. xx

Yes going to give myself a bit of time then make a plan to try again x thank you xx

I’m so sorry to hear this. Sending you lots of love xxx

Thank you ❤️x


I am so sorry to read this. I have not even started IVF so I do not know what you are going through but I feel for you.


Pinksunshine39 in reply to Hidden

Thank you ❤️x

I’m so sorry how devastating.💔

Thank you ❤️x

I'm so sorry to hear this, take care of yourself! Take a bit of time for you. Wish you all the best in the future. X

Thank you ❤️x

I’m sorry. It happened to one of our embies once. Luckily I had more than one but I was really upset and it really threw me so I can only begin to imagine how you’re feeling 😔 So sorry xx

Thank you ❤️xx

I’m so sorry you are going through this...I know only too well the heartbreak infertility throws at you. Last September, after nearly 4 years of ttc I got pregnant with twins after a FET. I miscarried in October. Then two weeks ago I transferred two more embryos, yesterday was my official test day, my beta came back at less than 2 (strong negative) 😢😢

At this point I don’t even know what my next steps are...I dread another stim cycle. Me handling the disappointment is one thing, but to have to watch my poor husband go through it breaks my soul, he’s such an optimistic, positive person and I’m afraid this will change that about him.

I’m so sorry for your losses x this journey is so heartbreaking at times x I’m dreading a full stim cycle again too x the emotional and physical energy it takes is just so overwhelming x take some time, no decisions have to be made today. That’s what I’m telling myself x sending you lots of love and strength to get through this ❤️xx

Sending love and BIG virtual hugs lovely, i'm so very sorry xxx

Thank you so much xx

Take care of yourself lovely, life can be so cruel. We're here for you ♥️

oh my god 😣 the pain is too much. i am so incredibly devastated for you two. to get that far 💔 we just did our first transfer, got a positive, and then lost it, so we, too, are grieving, and it is just so hard. i’m so sorry you weren’t even given the chance to see. we will get through it. one day at a time. we don’t need to have the answers or know a plan yet. just lean on your community if you can and allow yourself the space to grieve. i am so sorry.

Thank you so much for your support x this journey can be so cruel x I’m so sorry for you loss x sending you lots of love to get through this ❤️xx

Sending you so much hugs and prayers..just went through the heartbreak myself. So grateful for this platform to get the support we all need throughout this journey be it a good or bad outcome. Never lose hope. And love on eachother as much as you can..many blessings

Thank you ❤️x

I'm so deeply sorry Pink. Sending you massive hugs your way ❤

Thank you ❤️xx

I’m so sorry. Sending a hug xx

Thank you ❤️x

I am sorry for you loosing that. I am also waiting on my only blastocyst and worrying on how it will go xx

Thank you ❤️x wishing you lots of luck x I’ll have everything crossed for you xx

I’m so very sorry, my heart goes out to you having been in a similar situation previously. Sending you the biggest hugs. I know it seems impossible right now but you will get through this. xxx

Thank you so much xx

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