Heartbroken......: So yesterday I was... - Fertility Network UK

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Heartbroken......

Lilli79 profile image
51 Replies

So yesterday I was officially 12 weeks and I had a miscarriage overnight. It was so quick I don't think calling my midwife/gp would have helped. Everything was going so well, I felt like my body was handling the pregnancy so well. Myself and my husband were on holidays camping when it happened, so it was doubly hard that we weren't at home but at least we were able to cuddle & comfort each other through the night without any distractions. We are both devastated, I have never seen my husband so upset. Came home early from holiday and very tearful in the car home but nice to be able to talk it out. Taking a break now for 3 months and just going to see what happens. I have called my midwife but could only leave a message, where else can we get advice about next options? We will be self funding on next round and there are so many options which are all very expensive and don't know what would work for us. I know I shouldn't be posting so soon but it's good to get it all out, we are trying to see the positives of getting this far xxxx

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Lilli79 profile image
Lilli79
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51 Replies
Hormomalmess profile image
Hormomalmess

So sorry to see this. Big hugs xx

LisaMV profile image
LisaMV

Hugs. No words I say will make it better clxxxx

So very sorry. Take care ❤️X❤️

louisear profile image
louisear

no words anyone can say will make it feel any better. From someone who's been through it several times, just wanted to say thinking of you. Take time to grieve. It is a process and you'll have good days and not so good days. Take comfort in each other and support from those around you. Virtual hugs xx

Lilli79 profile image
Lilli79 in reply to louisear

Thanks Louise, you are incredibly strong to go through this several times and still be so supportive. Thank you so much, I am keeping my chin up. Having a well deserved glass of wine tonight xx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Oh my, I'm so so sorry xx

Hollibob profile image
Hollibob

:-(

X

AllWeNeedIsluv profile image
AllWeNeedIsluv

So sorry hun it's, heartbreaking. Be good to yourselves xx

So sorry to hear this, thinking of you xxx

Newqgirl1 profile image
Newqgirl1

Oh no I'm so sorry to hear your news, sending love and hugs xx

Aleelilook profile image
Aleelilook

So terribly sorry, my thoughts are with you xxx

Littledee88 profile image
Littledee88

So sorry to hear of ur loss. Thinking of you. Xx

CountryCat profile image
CountryCat

Absolutely awful news Lilli, dreadful. 😢I am extremely sad to read this and my heart goes out to you both. Thinking of you with love xx

So so sorry for your loss Lilli. Thinking of you xxxx

Sweets1 profile image
Sweets1

So sorry, take care xx

So sorry to hear this, sending you both huge hugs xx

_MrsC profile image
_MrsC

Oh gosh I am so sorry to read this. Thinking of you at such a devastating time. xxx

E_05 profile image
E_05

There are no words but I'm so sorry for your loss x

C_L_A_I_R_E profile image
C_L_A_I_R_E

lilli this is so upsetting, this is such a hard journey and it feels so unfair. Look after yourself and your oh x

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

I'm so sorry to read this! Big hugs!xx

itsworks17 profile image
itsworks17

Very sorry to hear this. Stay strong. Lots of love to both of you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

I'm so sorry to read this xx

N_M_10 profile image
N_M_10

So sorry to read this. Sending you love. xx

Sorry to hear this big hugs xxx

7AVA profile image
7AVA

I'm so so sorry to hear this Lilli. I had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks and it was devastating. My thoughts are with you at this hard time. Please try to get some counselling - you can usually access this through your GP. My heart goes out to you and your husband. Xxx

Lou9 profile image
Lou9

This is very sad news and I am so sorry for what you and your husband are going through. Xx

Bluebelle1 profile image
Bluebelle1

I am so so sorry to read this. It seems so unfair. Look after yourselves the both of you. xxx

Fredaflintstone profile image
Fredaflintstone

So sorry you to hear tour heart breaking news. 😢 Hope you're ok xx

theblondeone profile image
theblondeone

Oh no I'm so gutted for you both.

I don't think your posting to soon it's good to get support. I know there's nothing anyone can say but sometimes just sharing helps a little. Sounds like you have a really good attitude even though must be devastated.

I think a break is good to deal with things. You don't have to choose next step yet. Just concentrate on looking after each other for now x

Dreamingofbaby profile image
Dreamingofbaby

Sorry to hear this. Look after self x

Lucylu_88 profile image
Lucylu_88

So sorry to read this. Just wanted to send you love and strength.

xxx

Gem11 profile image
Gem11

I'm so sorry to hear your news, you are doing amazing to just get up at the moment. I'm sending you my prayers and love 😘

Hannah_J profile image
Hannah_J

Hold on, dear... It's hard and devastating... I share your pain. And your desire to go on and fight is admirable! And what's more wonderful, it's your relationships with your husband. I wish you both strength and mutual understanding.

Yes, there are many options in your fertility journey, but endeed it's your Dr's responsibility to assess your situation and help you choose the best one. I wish you to find it soon!

Hugs to you!

Daxi16 profile image
Daxi16

I'm so sorry for your loss xx

baby2016 profile image
baby2016

I'm so so sorry to read this. How tragic for you both. Have you heard back from the midwife as you really need a scan to check everything out. Sending you a huge virtual hug from one of many ladies on here who knows and understands your tragic pain xx

Lilli79 profile image
Lilli79 in reply to baby2016

Hi baby2016 no not heard back from midwife yet, but calling gp today for an appointment. First pregnancy miscarriages seem to run in our families so we're taking some hope that this may never happen again. We will get back on our feet, I am sure. It's upsetting but we have each other. All the kind words & support on here is lovely xxx

Allybally81 profile image
Allybally81

So sorry 😞 Xxx

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

I'm so sorry to hear this. I'd definitely make sure you speak to your midwife as they'll probably need to examine you. As for posting on here, everyone copes in their own way and if talking/posting about it helps then post away. That's what this forum is for. Take care of yourself x

Kyell2 profile image
Kyell2

I'm so sorry to hear this 😔take care of yourself (and each other) x

Hugs... sorry won't help but the pain will get easier day by day x

Linda78 profile image
Linda78

Am so sorry to read this - share your pain too having gone through a very similar experience. Would echo what someone else said about going to get checked out though. Look after yourself xx

Ems83 profile image
Ems83

So so sorryto hear this 😢💔

Heartbreaking, thinking of you both xxx

Grace30 profile image
Grace30

I'm so sorry to hear this. Take some time to grieve and build your strength up again! Don't loose hope. Thinking of you both x

winston1 profile image
winston1

Hi, lily......... It's very sad to know about this incident. But all I can say that It's a part of life. send you lots of virtual hugs my dear...... Now I just want to say that ........ don't think that much about it. I know it's not an easy but you have to be very strong. Take some time before going to take another chance. Everything will be fine as the time passes. Wishing you a Luck...... Take Care sweetie!!!

mupcake profile image
mupcake

So sorry. Seriously I don't have words. It's too harsh & difficult to accept when you were at 12 weeks. Take care of yourself honey there is nothing you could have to done to prevent it from happening. Hugs xx

Kelly-03 profile image
Kelly-03

I am so sorry to hear this xx it is devastating and such a journey, take time to work you mind out and what you want. Speak to your clinic and get an appointment to discuss options so at least you can think about it? Thinking of you take care xx

sorry to hear about your loss.

Leesara profile image
Leesara

Oh I'm so sorry, take care and be easy on yourselves oxo

Oh lilli I'm so sorry.

In terms of next steps, any good fertility clinic should be able to give you some pointers x

AmbK profile image
AmbK

So sorry to hear about your loss! :( I know the feeling... all I can say is you've got to look forward. Don't hold in - cry, shout, break a thing or two in house (I did break a vase) but just find a way to heal. It will never be completely gone though, just that you've got to prepare yourself to handle it like a bad memory. I had mine in February (8th week). I still cry sometimes at night thinking about it. Feels like a part of me has been burned down forever.

Men, they tend to hide and be strong to support us, but they are no less devastated with it. Imagine they have to cope with us going insane, plus their own despair over losing the baby. It will take time I know.. just make sure you make an effort to heal.

Hope this helps! Sending you lots of love and big hugs.

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