OTD - BFN: Hi ladies, As the title says... - Fertility Network UK

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OTD - BFN

JoP32 profile image
31 Replies

Hi ladies,

As the title says, BFN.

Totally not a surprise for me, I’ve been testing since 6dpt so knew it was inevitable. Have come to terms with it now - cried my tears at 6,7&8dpt so today is sort of an empty day’, emotions wise.

In other news, because we knew it hadn’t worked I had a call with another clinic on Saturday (I have to feel like I’m doing something to move forward in this process. The waiting, as you all know, sends us a bit loopy). Anyway, 2. things came out of that call

1) I’m glad I did it as it’s definitely helped this morning to feel way less shit as we’ve already started the process of moving clinics (as much as you can with this CV lockdown anyway 🙄), and

2) I was told I should have a Hysteroscopy to investigate the miscarriages (3) and BFNs (2). Does anyone have any experience with this - any idea how long the NHS waiting list is (under normal circumstances) or are we better off just going straight to private (again, when we’re allowed to leave the house etc), and if so, what kind of £££ are we looking at?

Sorry to all the ladies getting bad news atm. It definitely doesn’t help knowing we can’t progress with other cycles due to this CV situation. I’m thinking of you all and sending lots of virtual hugs. 🤗

Xxx

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JoP32
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31 Replies
Lots8788 profile image
Lots8788

So sorry to hear this Jo and for your losses too. Next steps sound positive xx lots of love to you xx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toLots8788

Thank you Lots. xxx

Rox1388 profile image
Rox1388

Sorry to hear about your BFN. It’s good that you have a plan in place for moving forward already.

I had a hysteroscopy on the NHS and personally didn’t wait long at all, I was referred for it in the September and I’m pretty sure I had it in the Oct/Nov. I’m based in the North East so it might vary depending on which hospital you attend. I don’t know exact figures but I imagine it would be quiet expensive to have it done privately. Good luck with your future treatment xx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toRox1388

Thank you Rox. Xxx

Italy300618 profile image
Italy300618

Aww Jo I am so so sorry to hear this 😥 I was so hoping this would be your time. I know you've known yourself it hasnt worked but it wont make today any easier. I am glad you've started moving forward with a clinic and next steps (it definitely helped me to feel more positive and proactive in this awful process) but just wanted to send a big hug to you, you arent alone and we are all here for you 🥰😘 xxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toItaly300618

Thank you lovely. sorry for the delay in reply, took a few days to myself and stayed off the forum just to clear my head a bit. I hope you're doing ok. Sending a big hug back your way!! xxx

Italy300618 profile image
Italy300618 in reply toJoP32

That's good I'm glad ☺️. I hope you're doing ok lovely, it's so hard 💞 thanks for the hug, take care of yourself and I hope you are able to continue your journey as soon as possible xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Sorry to hear of your results Jo! Its never easy but it sounds like making some plans ahead is giving you something to aim for, I find this helps. I would think that you'll wait sometime for a hysteroscopy on the NHS especially as all non urgent investigations have been stopped due to Covid-19.....this will just makes the lists even longer when they do start up again. Im not sure how much this costs in the UK these days however I had mine abroad and its cheaper, I looked at the costs when I had mine.xx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toCinderella5

Thank you hun. Sorry for the delay in reply, I took a few days off the forum to clear my head. Yeah, I tend to agree with you re. waiting on the NHS. I've been researching costs as well and think I'm just going to sign up to my work private health insurance and get it done using that. Failing that, I'll go abroad as you've suggested, it does seem much cheaper! xxx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply toJoP32

I had mine done under GA so they could fix anything e.g removing polyps etc. It would put the price up but to be honest having a hysteroscopy when you havent had kids yet can be pretty painful. Hopefully your work insurance will cover! Best of luck lovely. Hope your few days away helped.xxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toCinderella5

Yeah, I’ve heard it can be really painful. Definitely going to opt to be knocked out for sure!

The few days away helped a lot, thank you 💕 I feel ready to cheer people on and provide support again when needed! 🙌

Hope you’re keeping well & safe during this unusual time. Lots of love. Xxx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply toJoP32

Glad to hear it!! Yes all good at my end thank you, healthy and that's the best we can ask for at this stage!!xx

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx in reply toJoP32

I’ve PM’d you xx

KiboXX profile image
KiboXX

Oh Jo I’m so sorry to hear this 😢 I understand the need to be proactive though. I had a hysterocopy, after being referred by my doctor, I got referred in the feb and the procedure was in May so it wasn’t horrendously long but I did end up having to have two. First one they did under local and it was too painful so had to wait another few months to have another under general. Would definitely recommend pushing for general in the first place if you can xx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toKiboXX

Thank you lovely! Awwww, that sounds awful. Poor you! I will definitely ask for sedation - thank you for the advice!! I hope everything is still progressing really well with you! Sending lots of happy thoughts and cant wait to hear your next update! xxx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie

Hi my love. So so so sorry to hear this. Even if you're "expecting" it, doesn't make it any easier. This is awful news. 🙁🙁🙁 Thinking of you. Glad you're getting back on it and making plans, and have had a call with another clinic. Always feels good to be moving forward.

On the hysteroscopy front..... this is really going to depend on where you live. For a very recent personal experience (myself in Berkshire), my clinic told me I needed a hysteroscopy before continuing with my next cycle. This was back in November. I went to my GP immediately to be referred for an NHS gynae appointment (even though I had been seeing an NHS gynae back in 2018&2019 - I was no longer on their list as I had been referred for IVF and taken off. Not that IVF is the solution to all problems and you wouldn't have any further gynae problems you need help with!!!). I called round a few local private clinics for quotes on a hysteroscopy. A lot of places won't do it unless you are a patient there for fertility treatments. The cheapest place I could find was one in London. I had a consultation in December (reduced rate of £100) and a hysteroscopy first week of Jan (£900). NHS, however, my consultation to discuss a hysteroscopy is June (which I imagine will now be moved) and who knows when the hysteroscopy would have been?! I really think that NHS appointments after all this will be a lot worse as they will have a massive backlog of all the non-urgent stuff to get back through.

Sending lots of love. xxxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply tottcemmie

Thank you lovely. Sorry for the delay in reply, I took a few days off from the forum to clear my head a bit. Thank you so much for the info on the Hysteroscopy. I think I've decided to go private and just get it done, the waiting list after covid will probably be huge and time is not something we ivfers have on our side! And I think what happened to you is fairly common, referral in November not to be seen in June is not a timescale we can work with!!

How are you doing otherwise? Ive been thinking about you and I hope you're holding up ok. Sending you a big hug. xxx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toJoP32

Thanks Jo. I'm... okayish. Lockdown is fine, but the lack of baby (as we all know) is just the worst. :( Doing okay. xx

Khess124 profile image
Khess124

So sorry about your news hunny 😔❤️ really hoping you get some answers as I can’t help with your questions best of luck ❤️

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toKhess124

Thank you hun. xx

I hope you're doing ok. xxx

Khess124 profile image
Khess124 in reply toJoP32

Not doing to bad, my sisters just given birth so I suppose that set me off a little but other than that doing okay thank you, how you holding up now? Xxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toKhess124

Oh no, that's tough. sorry to hear that (obviously pleased for your sister but, you know...)

Im ok thanks. Feeling a bit brighter after having a few days of normality (as normal as it can be in lockdown at least!) - but enjoying not watching everything I eat / drink / do etc. have been painting the hallway and clearing the garden in the evenings which I wouldn't have done before due to fumes and heavy lifting etc. So, keeping busy :-) xxx

Jessy1280 profile image
Jessy1280

Think a clinic near me charges £350 xx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toJessy1280

Really?! That's so cheap! Would you mind if I PM'd you to get the details? xxx

Lu1u profile image
Lu1u

My london clinic cost 1200..you will have a looong wait for nhs! Good luck x

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toLu1u

Yeah, you're right. I'm gonna go private I reckon, or abroad - which ever option comes first I think! Thank you xx

Chel91 profile image
Chel91

So sorry for your disappointing news 😔 Always so hard. Big hugs to you! I had my hysteroscopy for something like 400 done privately, it might have been a bit more if I included the other fees like the initial appointment. Probably worth calling around if your new clinic doesn't do it and get a few quotes / timeframes? Totally understand wanting to have a new plan to focus on. I'll be thinking of you! Plus hoping for all of us that we get the all clear to more forward in our next treatments asap!! 🤞 xxxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toChel91

Thank you lovely. sorry for the delay in reply, I took a few days off the forum to clear my head. That's really cheap compared to the prices Ive seen so far! Would I be able to PM you to get the details?

How are you doing? When is your OTD? xxx

Chel91 profile image
Chel91 in reply toJoP32

Totally understandable hun! Sorry I should have explained better I live abroad so that might be why it's cheaper.

OTD has come and gone unfortunately. Currently have AF so just getting through that, and then hopefully looking forward to next transfer asap. I just wish I had a date set to aim for. Crossing fingers for us all 🤞 xxxx

Picalilli99 profile image
Picalilli99

So sorry to hear about your BFN. They are so so tough. Glad that you are feeling the benefits of starting to make a plan though. I hope you can find somewhere for your op and that you don’t have to wait too long. Big hugs xxx

JoP32 profile image
JoP32 in reply toPicalilli99

Thank you lovely. Sorry for the delay in reply, I took a few days break from the forum to clear my head.

Sending big hugs back at ya! xxx

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