So my clinic got my test day wrong. I called yesterday regarding the bleeding I was having and asked them to check my test day ....originally given as fri 13th which I would be 15dp3dt. And it was incorrect, it was today!
After having some heavier and reddish bleeding last night i had lost all my hope.
After my transfer i was filled with happiness and hope and positivity, and really thought it might be our time.
We had 10 eggs, 5 fertilised, 2 3day embryos transferred and the remaining 3 didn't survive.
Our last round on NHS, nothing frozen to use, no money to self fund, we feel so broken and lost and numb. I thought we might have the best xmas present in the world but I was not meant to be.
This is unfair, cruel and emotionally draining.
Lots of love to you all, time for the sofa, wine, chocolate, sugar, hot baths, caffeine, more wine more chocolate and try to get through xmas the best we can.
No doubt I will be on action plan stations in the next few days asking you all sorts of questions ๐
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Italy300618
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Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear that ๐. I'm not feeling very positive too, my OTD is next week. Don't really know what to say, it's hard. Remember to be kind to yourself and look after yourself. This whole journey is really out of our control that's why it's so difficult. No amount of money or time can give you what you want. It all comes down to luck! Cry, let it all out and be sad for as long as you need and I hope that you start to feel better soon. Thinking of you xxx
Iโm so sorry to hear this. Nothing anyone says can help right now I know - you just need some time now to come to terms with it, spoil yourself with all the things youโve had to deprive yourself of recently, see Christmas through & start the new year with a fresh outlook which will bring some positivity and hope.
I'm so sorry. My heart goes out to you, it is truly soul destroying when you go through so much. My OTD 11dpt 3dt is tomorrow Friday and I know deep down its not worked. I have nothing left over, 1st cycle failed....our 2nd and last self funded cycle. Even if we found the money I cannot get time off work for appointments and I cannot afford to quit my job. It seems there is a sea of obstacles when we are already suffering and struggling to become mums. Take care of yourself. I wish you the very best. I do hope and pray that you do one day get your well deserved miracke. Xxxxx
Eat and drink all the choc and wine you want. Rest up and enjoy Christmas as much as you can and pick your journey up in the new year. Your heart and mind need time to recover xxx
Oh so sorry lovely. BFNs are such a shi*ter! Hope you have lots of support around you. Take it a day at a time and indulge in all the things you mention. We are all here to support you and you're not alone. Xx ๐
Iโm so sorry. BFNโs are so shit and this whole journey can really be so cruel. Look after yourself lovely and go for it with all those things you mention that would otherwise be denied. Sending you lots of love and hoping someday soon you get your so longed for miracle xxx
So sorry it wasnโt good news, BFNs suck. I think Christmas can be really difficult, mine last year after my mmc was terrible. Be kind to yourself and enjoy all those lovely treats you can indulge in ๐ xx
Iโm really sorry to read this. Life can be so cruel. I hope you can enjoy your Xmas as much as possible with your loved ones and wishing you all the best for the future ๐๐xX
So so sorry to hear this, thereโs never a good time but this feels like a particular difficult time of year for heartbreak. Treat yourself with all the Christmas drink and food and if you donโt want to socialise donโt feel you have to xx
Thank you for your kind reply, will definitely be staying tucked away this xmas and see the year through. Hopefully the new year will bring us more luck xx
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