I have been meaning to post an update for a while as I have been a member of this forum for over two years and the support and understanding I have received along with some of the friends I’ve made have literally kept me sane when I’ve been under the covers sobbing (again) dealing with the pain of infertility!
I do remember positive stories often offered me comfort and the belief that I too should dare to dream of reaching our goal of becoming parents. But they did also sometimes come with a pang of hurt when that dream felt so far out of reach.
Briefly(ish), my husband and I started TTC in July 2015, I was 34, he was 35 and after two years we discovered my AMH level was on the low side and his sperm count was slightly low although they still told us it ‘wasn’t impossible’ to conceive naturally (it bl*ody felt like it!)
Those earlier days were some of the hardest when I was still full of desperation and hopefulness mixed up with hopelessness and it really took its toll on our relationship. We had counselling at the fertility clinic - which I would highly recommend by the way - and began our first round of ICSI in September 2017. By February 2018 we had two failed rounds, no Frosties and broken hearts.
Life then went crazy with a big house move/renovation and then a scare of a rare generic disease which stopped round 3 in its tracks earlier this year.
With the all clear from that in April, we started round 3 (again), joined the rollercoaster of emotions and good/bad news at each stage to keep us on our toes then finally, somehow made it to a day five transfer with two top grade blastocysts (from 5 eggs collected and again nothing in the freezer)
Glastonbury festival portaloo, I finally got my magic moment!! and then sobbed for at least half an hour while I couldn’t look at the positive pregnancy test in my husbands hands!
That was two months ago and we’ve just had our first official NHS scan at just over 13 weeks where we saw our twins moving around. My heart could burst and again there were lots of tears.
I really hope I don’t offend anyone with this post but I honestly just want to give some hope when hope is gone and I truly wish none of us knew the pain of infertility but we are stronger than we know. I don’t think it will ever fully leave us, but I believe those of us who have gone through this and come out the other side, however that may be, are made of strong stuff and will be able to be so grateful in a different way for the positives we get in life.
Good luck to everyone still fighting, I really hope you get your dream xxx
thanks for sharing x x
A message of hope
Needing hope - poor egg quality
A story of hope for those suffering recurrent implantation failure 
Low AMH Hope... Our Miracle is here! **Sensitive**
Low AMH / One egg - success story (sensitive)
