My story of hope (sensitive)

[Franco81]

I have been meaning to post an update for a while as I have been a member of this forum for over two years and the support and understanding I have received along with some of the friends I’ve made have literally kept me sane when I’ve been under the covers sobbing (again) dealing with the pain of infertility!

I do remember positive stories often offered me comfort and the belief that I too should dare to dream of reaching our goal of becoming parents. But they did also sometimes come with a pang of hurt when that dream felt so far out of reach.

Briefly(ish), my husband and I started TTC in July 2015, I was 34, he was 35 and after two years we discovered my AMH level was on the low side and his sperm count was slightly low although they still told us it ‘wasn’t impossible’ to conceive naturally (it bl*ody felt like it!)

Those earlier days were some of the hardest when I was still full of desperation and hopefulness mixed up with hopelessness and it really took its toll on our relationship. We had counselling at the fertility clinic - which I would highly recommend by the way - and began our first round of ICSI in September 2017. By February 2018 we had two failed rounds, no Frosties and broken hearts.

Life then went crazy with a big house move/renovation and then a scare of a rare generic disease which stopped round 3 in its tracks earlier this year.

With the all clear from that in April, we started round 3 (again), joined the rollercoaster of emotions and good/bad news at each stage to keep us on our toes then finally, somehow made it to a day five transfer with two top grade blastocysts (from 5 eggs collected and again nothing in the freezer)

Glastonbury festival portaloo, I finally got my magic moment!! and then sobbed for at least half an hour while I couldn’t look at the positive pregnancy test in my husbands hands!

That was two months ago and we’ve just had our first official NHS scan at just over 13 weeks where we saw our twins moving around. My heart could burst and again there were lots of tears.

I really hope I don’t offend anyone with this post but I honestly just want to give some hope when hope is gone and I truly wish none of us knew the pain of infertility but we are stronger than we know. I don’t think it will ever fully leave us, but I believe those of us who have gone through this and come out the other side, however that may be, are made of strong stuff and will be able to be so grateful in a different way for the positives we get in life.

Good luck to everyone still fighting, I really hope you get your dream xxx

[Tugsgirl]

Really happy for you xx

[Franco81 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Thank you so much. We still have a long way to go but I’m trying to enjoy this moment xx

[Strawberrychaos]

Aww congratulations, lovely story. I love a good update it’s what keeps everyone going. Hope you have a healthy pregnancy hun xx

[Franco81 in reply to Strawberrychaos]

Thank you so much, we’re taking it a day at a time but already this is a moment I never thought I’d see! Xx

[Noah1981]

Oh wow I don,t even know you and I’m so happy for you TWINS too how amazing Iwish you and hubby all the very best and good luck with double trouble it will be amazing xx

[Franco81 in reply to Noah1981]

Thank you so much, we’re so grateful to have got this far.

I hope things work out for you too xxx

[Livinginhope2019]

Congratulations, thank you for sharing your lovely story xx

[Franco81 in reply to Livinginhope2019]

Thank you xx

[Orla9298]

What an amazing story, congratulations xxx

[Franco81 in reply to Orla9298]

Thank you. We’re not taking anything for granted and know there are still lots of hurdles but getting this far is more than I dared dream!

X

[Lowamh]

Glad your scan went well xxx

[strong-girl]

Congratulations a lovely post x

[Rowly88]

That's amazing news, congratulations xx 💛💜💚❤

[Franco81 in reply to Rowly88]

Thank you so much x

[Shirazlover2013]

Congratulations!! I loved reading this post, I’m 3 rounds down with nothing to show for it so reading your story gives me hope that sometimes you can get lucky! I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly and safely xx

[Franco81 in reply to Shirazlover2013]

Ah thank you so much. We’re taking a day at a time and know we have a long way to go but I’m really trying to keep positive and enjoy the moment I’ve dreamed of for so long.

We never had a hint of a positive before this one so I really don’t know why this one worked!

I really hope you get your miracle soon xx

[Picalilli99]

Awww what a lovely story congratulations! Aaah glasto ports-loos - there aren’t many things that would make them an enjoyable experience! Bet that was amazing (once it sunk in). Thanks for sharing. I am due to get back on the rollercoaster and begin round 4 later this month and so it’s lovely to hear a story like this as it gives me a boost of hope xx

[Franco81 in reply to Picalilli99]

Ah I am so glad you’re able to feel hope, somehow we pick ourselves up and keep going don’t we! Wishing you so much luck for round 4 xx

[Lots8788]

Many congrats! thanks for sharing x x

[AS100]

Such a wonderful update post 😍 massive congratulations!! 👶🏼❤️ 👶🏼❤️ I hope your pregnancy goes well and that you can relax a bit and enjoy 😁 Thank you for sharing the hope!!! xxxx

[Franco81 in reply to AS100]

Awww thank you, I’m getting really choked up seeing all these lovely messages!

I hope you’re doing ok lovely xx

[AS100 in reply to Franco81]

I meant to say, finding out at Glastonbury is just brilliant!!!!! 😎 💃 💫 💖 ✌️

[Franco81 in reply to AS100]

Doing pessaries and clexane injections in the long drops was an experience I’d rather forget though 🤦‍♀️

[Shelleybean]

Oh how lovely! And twins too.. what a blessing 💖 Huge congratulations and best wishes for a happy and healthy rest of your pregnancy xx

[Elynn]

Why would we be offended by your amazing news. Its wonderful congratulations. You are a warrior, l for one am proud of and for you. Bless you for posting. Enjoy your pregnancy.

[Franco81 in reply to Elynn]

Awww that’s so kind, thank you xx

[Judy18]

So happy for you and you give me hope. We have exactly the same situation as you. Thank you for sharing your journey and sending lots of love your way xxx

[Franco81 in reply to Judy18]

Thank you very much and good luck to you, I really hope things happen quickly for you x

[Millbanks]

That’s such a positive story, it gives me so much hope for us - thank you and congratulations 💖 x

[Franco81 in reply to Millbanks]

Thank you 😊

[Core]

Congratulations and thanks for sharing your story really does bring hope xx

[LittleMermaid1]

Congratulations ❤️ lovely post. Thanks for sharing your story xx

[Franco81 in reply to LittleMermaid1]

Thank you, I hope you’re managing to stay sane in your two week wait! Sending you lots of luck x

[LittleMermaid1 in reply to Franco81]

Thank you ❤️ xx

[Cinderella5]

Awww amazing news!! Huge congratulations!xx

[Franco81 in reply to Cinderella5]

Thank you so much. I really hope you’re doing ok xx

[emma-jane-30]

This is amazing congratulations to you both xxx

[Franco81 in reply to emma-jane-30]

Thank you, and congratulations to you too. What a wonderful birthday surprise! Xx

[Kempton]

Really pleased for you! Here's to a happy rest of pregnancy!