How soon to do FET again? : So I had my... - Fertility Network UK

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How soon to do FET again?

aamiller405 profile image
12 Replies

So I had my review appt today and my consultant said physically I'm good to go as soon as I have my next period. But said its down to me when we start again, he worded it as don't start until you're ready to face the disappointment again. Which seems a little harsh now I write it but Is probably good advice.

At the minute I think I'm wanting to just jump straight back into things ASAP. I'm still devastated by our loss but I don't think waiting will make it any easier for my personally. And I think I'll take better care of my body and emotions if I have to prepare for another transfer.

Just wonder what everyone else's experiences are, was getting straight back at it the best choice for you?

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aamiller405
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Livinginhope2019 profile image
Livinginhope2019

I had my miscarriage in July and have an action plan for a transfer in October. I think for me it helped knowing that I had things to plan (scans, medications etc) although at the moment it seems so far away! Don’t get me wrong there are days when I still feel extremely distraught, especially at work as one of my colleagues is pregnant and all she does is moan but I have hope for October. As none of my family know our plans I found it helpful to write in a notebook each day, how I feel and any old nonsense that makes me feel better. You do what you feel best for you , we are all different but you will make it one day at a time. Sending you hugs xx

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405 in reply toLivinginhope2019

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.. Aw it's so tough when it feels like other people don't appreciate something you're fighting so hard to have.. but thank you for sharing your advice, appreciate it xo

Livinginhope2019 profile image
Livinginhope2019 in reply toaamiller405

Thank you. I also bought a pair of angel wings with the birthstone for March which I hang On a wooden angel I have. My due date would have been March and it gives me some comfort as we never got to have scan pictures. Xx

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405 in reply toLivinginhope2019

Aw what a nice keepsake in the unfortunate circumstances. We had been calling our little one popsicle, I found out that build a bear have a bear called popsicle so bought one of those, good for a wee cuddle! Xo

Livinginhope2019 profile image
Livinginhope2019 in reply toaamiller405

That’s lovely xx

Kyell2 profile image
Kyell2

I guess it all comes down to whether or not you feel able to start again. You can only do what feels right for you. Sending hugs your way xx

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405 in reply toKyell2

Thank you, yeah need to really sit down and have a good think about it xo

I think only you can answer that but it’s a tough decision. I’ve always rushed back in (partly cause I had to) but I’ve really been struck recently reflecting by how much my body has been through in a short time and how emotionally exhausted I am. Could be good to give yourself a fixed ‘time off’ for fun, friends before getting back to it? Anyway, I hope you’ll know with a few days mulling it over. Xx

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405 in reply to

Thank you, appreciate your advice and hope you're well xo

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

For me, I would have liked to have had the opportunity to get doing after both of my early losses.....I feel so useless doing nothing that its not the best place for me. However my clinic think that its best to wait for a couple of normal periods and Im allowed to start meds on the 3rd one. I am a bit of a control freak so I like to move at my own pace and feel frustrated when I cant. Its different for everyone so could really advise as such but that's my feelings on it. Your consultant although it sounds harsh is right, you do need to feel strong enough for whichever outcome you may be facing ahead though.xx

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405 in reply toCinderella5

Thank you, I think in definitely edging towards getting stuck right back in, I think having something to focus on will be best for me xo

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply toaamiller405

Completely understand, Im exactly the same! Good luck.xx

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