Starting our IVF journey - age 38 and 40

[louisajane80]

We're about to start our IVF journey and I'm looking for others who are at the same stage, or have helpful advice having been through it themselves. I am 38 (39 next month) and my husband is 40. We have been trying to conceive for around 18 months with no success and neither of us have had previous children. Recent fertility tests show my FSH levels are high and my husband's recent sperm tests show low count and motility. Looking at statistics online our chances look really slim but we want to start a family so much. Any success stories out there or advice to give us hope?

[AmbK]

Hi there, firstly I want to wish you luck to get pregnant soon. Now onto your question... I haven't been through IVF yet but I can assure you that women at your age or say couple like yours do get pregnant successfully with IVF these days. Also, from the condition you mentioned though natural ttc might have a slim chance of success it's not the case with IVF. High FSH is because your ovarian reserves are low probably... but that doesn't need maor fix if you're going for assisted fertility. I have been digging a lot online over IVF for past 8 months to perhaps suggest that you could have better chances if you go for ICSI+IVF. When there's a motility issue or the egg quality is not at it's best the ICSI helps. Also, keep in mind that you might need to emphasise on twin transfer to improve your chances. In order to do that's it's always better to make healthy lifestyle changes and talk to the doc to deal with any age related insufficiency (if there's one in either of you). I think there's a video blog on youtube where you can find more info on the process and lots of stories for success of older women to reassure you about your own chances. Let me know in message box I'll share the link if you need it.

[louisajane80 in reply to AmbK]

Thanks AmbK. There’s so much to take in - your advice makes it a bit easier to understand. We have our initial consultation in a few weeks so will hopefully find out more soon.

[Yammie1973]

Hi Louisa, I am 46, my DH is 45. We have 9 healthy frozen embryos in a private clinic. My DH had low motility in his sperm but we still have 9 embryos. We will be starting the embryo transfers shortly, so I have to believe that there are miracles out there in the universe. Don't let people tell you that there is little to no chance after 40...each situation is unique and you may just be lucky. My brother and sister in law had only one embryo and took the chance. my nephew will be 3 next month...don't give up hope.

[louisajane80 in reply to Yammie1973]

Thanks Yammie. I’ve read so many times that chances reduce drastically after 35 and it’s so easy to start thinking it will never happen in our late 30s or 40s. You sound so strong and positive. I hope I can be too. Best of luck with the embryo transfers.

[AmbK in reply to Yammie1973]

Good luck to you!! don't worry if it got this far I'm sure there are better days ahead and you will make it.... or one of these viable embies. Did you guys need the ICSI or it was the normal IVF? Well, I've heard ICSI+IVF kind of increase success rate where there's some inconsistencies in the male SA.... but I guess it's not needed sometimes. Stay rocking and optimistic.... sending you love and loads of luck

[mgabri]

Hi, I’m 38 (39 in July). We had our 1st IVF ICSI cycle in January, low sperm count and motility - currently 18 weeks pregnant with my 1st. Don’t let statistics put you off. Keep positive and best of luck xx

[louisajane80 in reply to mgabri]

Congratulations! That’s the kind of success story I need to hear. Best of luck with the rest of the pregnancy. Fantastic news!

[Shola76]

Hi my husband and I are both 42, he has low motility, I have high prolactin and fibroids and next week I will be 7 weeks pregnant following 1 round of ICSI. Good luck on your journey x

[louisajane80 in reply to Shola76]

Congratulations! Thanks for the reply. It’s great to hear these success stories. It helps keep positive thoughts!

[Jen_jen]

Wishing you all the very best. Don’t give up, my lovely friend has her miracle baby at 46. 🤞🏼💕

[LunaLovegood11]

Me and my partner are similar ages, and at a similar stage, just starting out... I have high FSH too (they said it’s age?!) and my partner had 2 spent samples - one came back terrible on all areas, the next one came back fine in all. I think there are so many factors that can influence both egg and sperm quality (tiredness, being run down, he thinks being a bit nervous affected him first time!)

There are loads of success stories out there and everyone is so different, it’s almost as if stats don’t apply to fertility as it takes one sperm in one egg - and all the medical help nowadays improves our chances.

Take it one step at a time, there are some good books and podcasts about that I find really useful too (listening to BFN now, and just bought the Get A Life book). Both try and keep healthy, here is wonderful to talk to people and read about others experiences xxx

[louisajane80 in reply to LunaLovegood11]

Thanks Luna. It’s reassuring to hear from people going through the same thing. I found this site a few days ago and think it’s great for supporting others. Good luck on your journey.

[kvs22]

Hi. I’m 42 as well as my husband. We’ve gone with ICSI because of low motility but when it came to the day the motility was fine. The clinic still proceeded with ICSI though. We are on our second round & currently in the 2ww. The first round the quality was a 2cc so not ideal. We got a better quality this time (11 months after the first round) but I’m not focussing on it as many have proven this journey is still possible with lower quality embryos.

I made lots of lifestyle changes after our first attempt last year & we got better quality embryos our second round. I’ve cut alcohol & caffiene for many months. Started acupunture & we are both on organic high protein diet (its expensive but worth a shot!). A friend gave me the book “it starts with the egg” by Rebecca Fett. It really makes you evaluate everything (including skin products you use) & I found it insightful. I’m taking extra magnesium, B6 & also myo-inositol (I have PCOS). Then we are both on CoQ10 and Impryl - you can get this on amazon as well. The Impryl was recommended by different gyneas (from abroad) to three different friends who all struggled to get pregnant so I thought to add it on to my list of things to try.

IVF is such an emotional rollercoaster & it can mess with your head so mental health wellbeing is just as important. Ensure you have a solid support system even if small.

Good luck with your journey. I hope you have fantastic results!

[Keggles36]

My work colleague and her partner are similar ages (a little older than you) and similar results, and they had a BFP a few weeks ago and positive 7 week scan this week after their second transfer. Hang in there, there is hope!

[Keggles36 in reply to Keggles36]

Also I'm 36, and have low amh. My partner has poor sperm motility. We are currently 20 weeks pregnant after a fresh ICSI cycle! Just thought after mentioning my work colleague, i should probably give you our hopeful story as well though our ages are a little different we're in the same part of our 30s xx