Starting our IVF journey : Hey everyone... - Fertility Network UK

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Starting our IVF journey

lucyjaynehayes profile image
29 Replies

Hey everyone

I am really new to this - so here we go, I am 28 years old and have been trying for a baby for around 3 years now. We have recently gone through all the initial tests both at our doctors and local hospital and are now waiting to go back to the clinic in January. I am currently reading various books about IVF and the journeys of people who are in a similar position; but it would be nice to get feedback from others on a more personal level.

Look forward to hearing from you

Lucy x

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lucyjaynehayes
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29 Replies
destiny121 profile image
destiny121

Firstly i advise dont overthink everything about the process. I did this and when actually going through it, it wasnt that bad afterall. The thinking and worrying makes its feel worse but once you get going you’ll be fine. I havent had my bfp but knowing that thia journey is helping me get there helps you day by day. Good luck xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply todestiny121

Hey

Thanks for your quick reply

Sorry BFP? - like I said really new to this

Feeling pretty positive ATM and just trying to find out the sort of things that we should be asking when we go back to the clinic

What was the next step for you at this point and how long did it take to move onto the next phase in your journey

Thanks

Lucy x

destiny121 profile image
destiny121 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

Sorry i should have knew that... its big fat positive.... pregnancy test! Took me a while as well to learn all of the lingo. So basically once starting my first ivf cycle i had to take injections daily for around 2 weeks and in this time had to have around 3-4 scans ready for egg collection. On one of my scans they saw liquid in my fallopian tubes and said i should continue the cycle. My partner came to the clinic once on egg collection day and gave his sample. They collected 19 eggs of which 8 fertilised. Anyway cut a long story short i had my embryo transfer but it didnt work. So now im waiting to have a small operation to clip that tube. I had 4 embryos frozen and shoud have my next cycle before summer.

Im not sure of the outcomes of your tests, however you’re young and have plenty of time to see what works for you best. It does get very emotional and sometimes you will feel low, but this is life... and sometimes things dont work the way we want.

The doctors will come up with a plan that works for you. Believe me when i say this, before i started i panicke about everything.... say if they cant get any eggs.... will my partner leave me..... my family are disappointed... all sorts of horrible stuff...... so just keep positive and know when its your time it will be your turn.

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply todestiny121

Lol haha I'm sure I'll get the had of it soon enough

Thanks for giving me an insight into your journey and hope all goes well with your operation - do you have a date for this

ATM I'm trying to take every day as it comes and have only really told our closest friends as I don't want to tell family etc until we know exactly what were dealing with - how have you found talking to people about your IVF journey

xxx

destiny121 profile image
destiny121 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

I havent got dates for my op yet. Ive only told my mum and my brother knows that im having a couple of issues but not too much details. I havent told any friends yet. I find it easier this way.

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply todestiny121

I'm sure you wont have to wait too long, ah right I have been the other way round only telling a few close friends as I don't feel I really have anything to tell my family just yet although I think my mum knows that there's something that were keeping from her

xxx

destiny121 profile image
destiny121

Also, waiting times for me varies...... but on average around 12-16 weeks. Seems like a long time.... but does give you a chance to plan and prepar for whats coming next....

sanchia46 profile image
sanchia46

Sounds to me like you’ll need ivf. All the best x

E_05 profile image
E_05

Welcome to the forum! I think the unknown of the journey is what becomes worrying so although it’s good to read the books try not to panic yourself with them. We began treatment around 3 years ago and probably the best advice I could give is take each day as it comes try not to look to far ahead, ask any questions you have as nothing is silly and this forum is a massive support normally someone is able to answer xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

Hey

Thank you for your reply

ATM I'm just trying to take every day at a time and it's actually quite nice to have this short break especially over the Christmas period whilst we wait to go back to the clinic in January

Hence why I've taken to reading about the following stages as I think that sometimes its the unknown that tends to drive you crazy

Are there any questions that you would suggest asking, we have already started to make a list but would be nice for some extra input

All the best

Lucy xxx

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

Definitely it’s good that your still about to enjoy Christmas, this is the first Christmas in a while we haven’t had treatment and it’s quite nice.

Your right the unknown is the worst bit and unfortunately everyone’s bodies are so different if varies from person to person. Have you signed all the paper work to begin IVF or are you doing that in January? I found my clinic we’re really thorough with explaining the main thing I wanted to know was timings so I could plan my life around treatment and making sure I didn’t book a holiday or anything that would delay or interfere with treatment xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

Aww hopefully the festive period will be able to take your mind off it for while as I'm hoping t will with us too

No we've not signed the paperwork yet I think that is what we'll be doing when we go back in January

Yeh it's timings that I am most concerned about obviously with work, fortunately my hours of work are flexible and I am available throughout the main part of the day but it will be if I need to take time off that concerns me the most

Lucy xxx

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

Oh okay, at my clinic once I’d started the drugs it was just scans to check follicle growth but I always asked for mine first thing so they didn’t interfere with work to much. They EC I’d recommend taking that day and the day after off as it can be a little uncomfortable. ET is pretty quick so again you only need the morning/afternoon off and then can continue will life just taking it easy xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

Aww thank you for that advise

After ET I read that some people recommend taking the 2 weeks off until you go for a pregnancy test or do you think this is down to personal preference xx

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

I think it’s definitely down to preference and what job you do, I’m a carer so I’ve always had a couple of days off around ET but never the full 2 weeks xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

Aww that's good to know I don't really want to tell my employer why I am going to be off xx

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

I don’t know what your job is but sometimes extra scans can crop up when your not expecting them depending how you react to the drugs. If you’ve got enough flexibility in your job you might be okay not telling them but sometimes it helps xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

I have my own dog sitting business but alongside this I also do some cleaning, luckily I can be quite flexible throughout the main part of the day but as I work in a school in the afternoon this is the job that I would struggle to take time off from obviously during term time unfortunately x

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply tolucyjaynehayes

Oh okay yeah I understand, id just explain to your clinic that if possible can you have your scans in the morning due to work. My clinic try to help as much as possible xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toE_05

Yeah so far we have been lucky with our appointments so I am hoping this is going to be the case throughout x

Newyeae profile image
Newyeae

Hey I'm currently in my first cycle of IVF so not finished yet. I am 29 and had also been trying for 3 years before we thought things were not quite right and went to our doctor. As has been said take each step at a time as it is a rollercoaster. I am waiting to see if our embryos are going to grow enough in the lab for one to be put back inside me. It's hard but all I'm focusing on is them growing not if I will be pregnant soon. All the best x

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toNewyeae

Hey

Thank you for your reply and letting me into you journey. I think its definitely the unknown that tends to drive you crazy but I'm trying to take every day as it comes.

Have you spoke to friends and family about your journey

All the best

Lucy xxx

SeaChange profile image
SeaChange

Hi Lucy,

Sounds like you and I are in a very similar boat. I'm 27 (he's 32) we've been trying for over 2 years and have just finished all our tests and have our round up consultation appointment in January where I expect IVF will be on the table.

I can't help with giving insight on what IVF is like, but it would be lovely to keep in touch through our journeys.

wishing you all the best, xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes in reply toSeaChange

Hey

Thanks for your reply, sorry what's your name?

It's nice to know that there's someone at the same part of our journey, my partner suffers from anxiety and depression so don't always want to tell him every little detail - so it would be lovely to keep in touch throughout our process.

How are you finding things so far?

All the best to you also

Lucy xxx

Newyeae profile image
Newyeae

Hey Lucy. I have told my closest friends and family as I feel like we as a couple need support from them. I am a very open person so I feel better sharing my journey with them. I was anxious about starting IVF but physically it's been ok so far. It's the hurdles that we need to pass at each step and the emotional feelings that we are struggling with. So far it has gone ok but I am not getting my hopes up. However from what the staff have done for me and the medical help they have given so far I have lots of hope. As we are younger hopefully we have that on our side x Kirsty

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes

So far I have only told a couple of close friends as I would like to find out a bit more before sharing this with family as at the moment I don't feel like I've got much to tell them. We are also the same regarding the tests we have had as although the medical team can not give us our exact results they have been positive about what they have seen in scans etc.

Yeah definitely lets hope that age in on our side

xxx

Welcome to the forum!

Like you we are now both 28. We started trying in Dec 2013 as I knew the rules as I work in a GP surgery and I always had a feeling it wouldn’t be easy to get pregnant.

I have PCOS but not bad enough to cause a problem so our infertility was unexplained. We had our first cycle last Nov after being referred end of Aug and got a BFP but unfortunately had a miscarriage. We had a frozen transfer in May and had another BFP and I’m now 32 weeks pregnant.

I’m the most pathetic person I know when it comes to needles, operations and anything that might hurt but I’ve never been so proud of myself for being able to do it all and looking back it was no where near as scary and painful as I thought it would be.

Just try not to let it take over too much and make time for each other xx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes

Hi

Thank you for being in touch its nice to know that people around our age know exactly what were going through

Our infertility is also unexplained so far which I suppose is a good thing but sometimes it still doesn't make things any easier

Congratulations on your fantastic news

ATM I'm just trying to take every day as it comes and read around what our journey may hold

Lucy xxx

lucyjaynehayes profile image
lucyjaynehayes

Hi

Thank you for being in touch

I've got to say that I am pretty impressed with the care we have received so far as we have had all the tests necessary in the matter of weeks when I though it would take much longer

Like I said we are now waiting to go through our results in January back at the clinic, so ATM I am enjoying the break we have got over the Christmas period before then; to which I am also taking this time to make connections through the forums whilst also trying to read more into the IVF process

Thank you so much, how far along the process are you

Lucy xxx

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