Sorry to moan and this isn’t all about fertility either so feel free to not read on.
So I have now definitely had an early miscarriage. Had a terrible and heavy bleeding night last night. Then heard from my grandma and found out she has got breast cancer which will be hard for them to treat as she’s 80 with other health conditions. Then found out my sisters puppy had to be put down today! They only had her for a week and four days!! Absolutely hideous!
And to make it even worse hubby and I have had a massive row and he’s really upset now. Just need to have some better days 😢💔 xx
Written by
KirstyC90
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Oh no! What a horrible week! I’m so sorry that you are going through all of this. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it must be for you right now.
I hope that things over the next week get a little easier and you have chance to properly grieve your loss. I really hope that your gran gets the care she needs and is looked after well.
Sending you massive massive hugs hun. So sorry. It never rains it bloody pours. In had the week from hell too hun. Sending you lots of love. Take as much time as you need to treat yourself and grieve. 😘😘💝💝
Oh gosh, what a horrible time you’ve had. Please look after yourself and your relationship as a priority - it will be easier to get through everything else if you have support at home.
I speak from experience as I had a similar time in May when I had an early miscarriage, my partner’s parents’ dog was killed and a friend passed away in the space of 2 days.
These things are sent to test us... I have made some positive improvements to my life following the death of my friend. I just wish it hadn’t taken losing him to get me off my backside...
Re:miscarriage, I found the best thing for me was to tell people - I know it’s a bit of a taboo subject but being open with those around me helped me to process. However, with your grandma so poorly, this might not be easy on your family, so just want to make you aware of the miscarriage association and Tommy’s, if you’re not aware already. Great websites and the MA have a phone line too I believe.
I’m so sorry to hear about all of this Kirsty. What an awful week for you and no surprise you’ve rowed with your husband. After my miscarriage, I had huge rows with my boyfriend, I think we were both finding it hard to process in different ways. With the news of your grandma as well, this is a very tough time for you and I would recommend getting some support as soon as possible. I left it 6 months before I got counselling after my miscarriage, I would try to get support sooner if you can. Sending hope for happier times ahead. Xxx
Thank you. My clinic has offered me counselling and actually I think I will as I’m finding it really hard this time. We’ve made up now but I feel awful I hate to see him upset as he’s such a lovely husband he never means to upset me. I think we need a break together. We were booked to go to Spain in the summer but we couldn’t as we had IVF appointments so he has used all his holiday up now. I work in a school so I get holidays off xxx
Good news that your clinic has offered you counselling, your husband may even want to go to (although I know most men don’t like the idea). Glad to hear you’ve made up and are considering a holiday, that will do you the world of good. Take care of yourself and each other xxxx
Yes you have had a shitty week I think u have the right to moan. I can understand why u and your partner ended up in a row he’s probs upset too and remember we tell men in our society that it’s not ok to be upset so he is doing the only thing he knows how - lashing out. I don’t know either of you so prehaps once you have both calmed down you could have a chat and work out what you’ll both do next time. 😕
Yeah we went for a walk with the dogs last night and have calmed down. I’m going to get counselling for both of us at the clinic because he’s very good at hiding his feelings and that worries me a bit. He’s so ready to be a dad and he’ll be fantastic I just wish it would happen for us 😔
I’m so glad. I think sometimes in harder on men. We have to go through all the pain and meds etc and their job is to sit back and watch. My husband really struggles with that. Plus I’m emotional so cry all the time which prevents him from doing it because he feels like he has to be strong for me. 😞 that sounds like a good idea I’m looking into counselling too. This journey is so shit. We do anything to fall pregnant 🤰
Oh my god that’s a horrendous week, I’m so sorry, sometimes life can be bloody cruel 😞 that’s really good they’ve offered you counselling, I would have well and truly lost the plot by now! We’ve had something similar where we miscarried recently after round 6🤦🏼♀️ then my father in law (also 80)! Was diagnosed with lung cancer, life can be shit (understatement). I’m glad you and hubby have made up, perhaps try and do something nice together today, go out for lunch or something xxxx
I’m sorry you’ve had a shit time too. You’re right it just all comes at once it’s like we get three things so we can distract ourselves from one with the other or something. I have lost the plot a bit I feel so awful after the row we had hopefully we’ll be ok after all this blows over. Got to find out our next steps now xx
I’m sure you will, remember your hormones must be all over the place which literally makes everything worse🤦🏼♀️ always here for a moan if you need it! What are you thinking next steps wise? Xx
Thank you! I’m thinking I’ll phone the clinic and maybe get a counselling appointment for my husband and me. Then hopefully start talking about frozen transfer. I have no idea how frozen transfers work. I don’t know if I have to have medication or anything xx
Frozen transfers are so much easier, just some pills for around 3 weeks, then cyclogest leading up to transfer and then they pop it in! I found I went a bit potty on the progynova but there’s no injections, unless like me you need extra progesterone, but that comes later xx
That sounds much better! I’m hoping that they did freeze our embryos as they said they would but said they’d phone to let us know and never did! I’ll find out soon enough! What do the pills do? I’ll be glad of no injections! Xx
I’d give them a buzz and ask, or drop them an email so you can plan. The drugs stop you ovulating and build up the womb lining, they’ll scan you on the second day of your period, and one 10 days later, I generally have 3 scans and then transfer. You’ll continue on the progynova and cyclogest up until (fingers crossed) your 7 week scan. That’s the way my clinic does it, some clinics vary in the drugs, but they’re all pretty straightforward in comparison to growing the follicles! Xx
Why on earth do all these awful things happen in one whallup! I'm so sorry about your miscarriage and all the other sadness for you right now hope you hubby have made up as you need each other sending my love to you both and hopes for future happiness x
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