*update* Showing already.....

Thanks to everyones advice below we are scheduled to have our pre-holiday scan tomorrow morning privately at 10wks 7 days.....just a reassurance scan so still have to wait for 13 weeks for the Nuchal scan to get the all clear (hopefully).

Usual pre-scan anxiety setting in.....trying to stay calm today/tonight.

Please keep your fingers crossed this little guy is still inside and heart beating away.

Fingers and Toes crossed.

xxx

Original Message -

Hey Guys,

I am 8 weeks pregnant this week - awaiting my viability scan and nervous as can be expected....praying it is all ok....

I am getting stressed about the fact that I feel like I am already showing a bit....The other symptoms I can hide, but we have a family holiday with my parents at the end of July and I will definitely be showing a good bit more by then if I am already showing now.....nobody knows we were trying let alone having IVF and then this shock natural pregnancy after the failed cycle....

I would not want to tell my parents until I get to 12 weeks stage and have my scan but my holiday is week 12 and so will not have the scan done at this stage and won't be able to hide from my mum as she knows my figure and I will be 3 more weeks ahead of where I am now....

I know this seems like a trivial problem - but my parents make me anxious and I am afraid they won't keep things secret and start stressing me out. And as we are so scared and careful to manage our expectations of this shock natural pregnancy.

We have been in a little bubble my OH and I dealing with trying unsuccessfully and then failed IVF and doing ok.....I am scared for all of this to be out in the open....

What do you guys think?

xxx

[jade1003]

You could book in for a private scan just before you go, might give you peace of mind before holiday that all is well and then you’ll be able to show and tell family on your holiday xx

[Hidden in reply to jade1003]

Yes I was thinking to do that - but I am particularly worried about the Nuchal scan.....which I don't know if I am getting anxious about this too much.....and I spoke to a private clinic and I am too early to get this done before I go. I suppose I can get a general scan to just reassure myself in week 11.....

My mind is too far ahead as I have not even had my viability scan! What a lunatic

xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

If you’re worried about the nuchal scan you can have non-invasive prenatal testing eg Harmony testing. It’s a scan and blood test that can be done from 10weeks onwards and is more sensitive for Down’s, Edwards and Patau syndrome that the combined testing on the NHS. (You can also find out if you’re having a boy or girl if you want!).

It’s so hard with parents- could you pre-warn your Mum before the holiday? Eg telling her before you’ve gone away that you’ve put on weight and feeling a bit sensitive about it?

Good luck xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi, Yes that is a good idea.

TBH my mum could keep a secret if I told her to just keep it quiet....so that is a good option actually....I can get the Nuchal scan the day I get back from holiday and could tell them then....

I feel like the Harmony test might be an option - just our funds are limited....Good Idea though.

xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Ps Do you know if the Harmony test has any risk to the baby? xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

No risk that I know of- it just involves an ultrasound and a blood test from you (I’m a doctor). That is why some people end up having it if their NHS screening comes up as “high or moderate risk” as it it not invasive like amnio or CVS. I had mine last week at 11 weeks and then had my NHS scan today. They’re not cheap though

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks so much Zoe - it is good advice. Just reading about it now. That would mean that I could relax on holiday and of course be sure myself until the NHS scan comes up.

Hope all went well with your scan today! Thanks for replying when you have your scan to think about

xxx

[Billywhizz10 in reply to Hidden]

We had harmony scan as my wife was over 40, it was amazing to not only know there were no serious issues with downs but to learnt the sex of the baby also ! We had it at 10 weeks, you wont see much at 7 weeks apart from hearbeat beating away, but at 10 weeks you can make out your little human ! Best of luck! x

[Hidden in reply to Billywhizz10]

Sounds good

[Cinderella5]

I was just going to suggest a private scan just before you go but I see someone else has menioned it. Its pretty rubbish that you cant trust your parents to keep a secret until you know everything is ok. I wouldnt tell them unless you have to....as in if they guess. Could you get away with just saying you have been over indulging or is it pretty obvious? Hopefully being away will take the opportunity for your parents to tell anyone else!xx

[Hidden in reply to Cinderella5]

Yes that is what jade1003 is suggesting....a good idea....

I know - I love my parents but they tend to just go over the top. And strange as it may seem being isolated on this journey has meant I felt a lot less anxious and could be completely selfish. As soon as it is out in the open I get nervous....

I am pretty slim - and I have a bloated tummy that is showing up in dresses....even though it is not baby tummy yet....my mum will know - she is like a hawk

I know it seems crazy worrying when there are so many positives - but until everything is 100% confirmed ok we are being very careful to hope....

The scan before we go is a good idea though and will make us feel a little bit more confident maybe....

Thanks for taking the time to respond

xxx

[Hidden]

I completely understand your anxiety. If you have a scan before you go you will have that reassurance and you can get a v good indication of nuchal by 12 weeks. Mine was high at 12 weeks and increased to 6.4mm by 14 weeks. I’ve had 6 pregnancy losses but currently 16 weeks 🙏🏼 and cautiously optimistic. I think you should share with your parents and enjoy your holiday without worrying about them finding out or hiding not drinking/avoiding certain foods. God forbid anything went wrong you’d want to share it with your folks anyway and have their support. Either way, do what feels right and I wish you the v best of luck xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Aww thanks Natalia. I agree the scan before I go is the answer.

Glad everything is going well for you!

Thanks for taking the time to respond. So good to have support and help coming up with solutions. Xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

You can ask me anything, pretty much been through it all. Take care of yourself and have a safe pregnancy 🙏🏼Xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

💕💕💕

[lorraineb61]

Have you booked in your 12 week scan? They may be able to bring it forward to just before you go? Otherwise, as everyone has suggested - get a private scan done!!

We have our 12 week scan next week and I completely get the bloating - I had to go shopping at the weekend as I am so uncomfortable now with zips and buttons.

A private scan may reassure you anyway so that you may be able to tell your parents when you are on holiday xxx

[Hidden in reply to lorraineb61]

Aww thanks Lorraine. Once I get the viability scan all ok then will book a private scan like all you ladies suggest. It is a good plan.

Then I will just have to be patient for my 12 week.

I am just a bit worried how big I am....my cycle is messed up as I never got a 'Real' period after the failed IVF..

Fingers crossed for your 12 weeks - you are lucky to be at that stage!

Xxx